Prisma Times

From the Super Mario Wiki, the Mario encyclopedia
A Toad reading the Prisma Times

The Prisma Times is a newspaper that appears in Paper Mario: Color Splash. In Port Prisma, a Toad sitting near the Prisma Café reads the Prisma Times. He will read Mario a headline from it if he pays 10 coins, which serves as a hint for what Mario must do next.

After being defeated by Mario in the Sacred Forest, Kamek recalls that his magic was described as "a veritable all-you-can-eat buffet of chaos" by the Prisma Times.

Headlines[edit]

  • "Let's see here... Today's headline is "Port Prisma's Postal Toad Still MIA." Huh. I hope nobody tossed him in the recycling bin like a piece of common junk mail..."
  • "Let's see here... Today's headline is "Shimmering Blue Waters—Exploring Port Prisma's Indigo Underground." Bit of a mouthful, if you ask me. But the Indigo Underground... Isn't that place just outside of town?"
  • "Let's see here... Today's headline is "Suspicious Thing Found in Harbor District." They call this news? Harbors are a breeding ground for suspicion. Everyone knows that!"
  • "Let's see here... Today's headline is "Mountain Sage Madness on Daffodil Peak!" Hmm...that's that mountain beyond the Indigo Underground. The real steep and rocky one."
  • "Let's see here... Today's headline is "Hero Toad Loses Clothes, Mind at Cherry Lake." Hero, eh? We don't need another hero. Or...do we?"
  • "Let's see here... Today's headline is "Breaking: Bloo Bay Boat Broken on Beach." Someone needs to go help them! I would, but I have a sand phobia."
  • "Let's see here... Today's headline is "Oceanfest at Bloo Bay Beach!" Sounds like wholesome fun for everyone!"
  • "Let's see here... Today's headline is "Shipwrecked Toad Saved!" Hey, that's great news. I bet he's really grateful. Maybe he even feels like he owes someone a favor."
  • "Let's see here... Today's headline is "Crimson Tower Gate Closed; Weird Keys Needed." Weird keys? What the heck are weird keys?"
  • "Let's see here... Today's headline is "Fire Safety—Don't Get Burned." Well, that seems obvious. How about, "If you see a fire, put it out." There's a Fire Extinguisher on Ruddy Road, you know..."
  • "Big Paint Star Recovered—Princess in Peril! Well, that's a good news / bad news sorta thing, isn't it? At least you've got some experience rescuing princesses."
  • "Let's see here... Today's headline is "Scarlet Gate Scarlet Once Again." Glad that red gate got repainted. Now I can visit my uncle over in Sunglow Ridge."
  • "Let's see here... Today's headline is "Princess Missing—Professor Prone." Well, that Princess isn't like any kind of dog I've ever seen, but I heard she likes chewing on bones anyway..."
  • "Let's see here... Today's headline is "Track Attack: Kiwano Rails Crushed." Disgusting. Whoever crushed those rails should be behind bars! What's with that face, Mario?"
  • "Let's see here... Today's headline is "Bone Gone! Fossil Stolen during Excavation Caper." Apparently eyewitnesses saw masked bandits heading toward the Coliseum. What a story!"
  • "Let's check the classified ads... "Bone Wanted. I need it to win the Battle Royal. Will travel." Ooh! I heard about this! Apparently you have to wait for the enemy to line up, and then you drop the bone on 'em!"
  • "Mustachioed Bro Wins Big Paint Star at Coliseum! That's you! You're famous!"
  • "Let's see here... Today's headline is "Giant Coin Discovered in Mondo Woods. Finders Keepers Declared." Whoa. I think I need to take the rest of the day off and see if I can get my hands on that coin!"
  • "Let's see here... Today's headline is "Boo! Dark Bloo Inn Closed Due to Paranormal Activity!" I don't believe in ghosts. Do you think I could still make a reservation?"
  • "Let's see here... Today's headline is "White Water and Stranded Ships— a Port in Turmoil!" I don't know what any of thatmeans, but it sure sounds dramatic!"
  • "Let's see here... Today's headline is "Scientists Agree—the Floor Is Lava at Kiwano Temple!" I knew it! The floor IS lava!"
  • "Let's see here... Today's headline is "Large Turnip Turns Up in the Sacred Forest." I hear the Rescue Toads are working on harvesting it."
  • "Let's see here... Today's headline is "Mysterious Construction Project Begins on Cobalt Island!" That's one of the islands just southwest of Prism Island!"
  • "Let's see here... Today's headline is "Birdo Blabs; Balloon Secret Revealed." Huh. Apparently, if you're feeling sunk, Balloons can lift you up again."
  • "Indestructible Battleship Destroyed! Indestructibility Rating Lowered Significantly. Remind me not to get on your bad side!"
  • "Let's see here... Today's headline is "Fame, Fortune, and Treasure in the Violet Isles." The Violet Isles? Yeah, right! Those islands are just a myth."
  • "Let's see here... Today's headline is "To Sea! Hoist Your Sails and Wait for Wind!" Sounds exciting! But I guess you need some pretty powerful gusts to get anywhere in a sailboat. Like the ones that hit Bloo Bay Beach."
  • "Let's see here... Today's headline is "Get a Perfect Score in Snifit or Whiffit to Win a Fabulous Prize!" Sounds more like an ad than a headline, but I'm intrigued."
  • "Big Paint Star Found on Fortune Island! You should save this one for your scrapbook. That was some great swashbuckling you did out there!"
  • "Let's see here... Today's headline is "Celebrity Chef Closes Café—Line Gets Longer!" I heard that the chef who runs that Mustard Café is a real character. I heard he was taking a vacation right out front of his shop!"
  • "Let's see here... Today's headline is "Can Blue Rescue Squad Get Tracks Back on Track?" That Rescue Squad is a joke. Someone needs to help them out."
  • "Let's see here... Today's headline is "Engine Gets Moving, Gets Crushed." Well, that didn't last long. I hope Toad Trainworks can fix it!"
  • "Let's see here... Today's headline is "Crushed Engine Being Repaired at Toad Trainworks." Wait...they're repairing the engine while the passengers are still on board? That's got to be annoying for the people in coach!"
  • "Let's see here... Today's headline is "Train Arrives Late; Water Is Wet." Sounds about right. I heard the train was bound for Tangerino Grill."
  • "Let's see here... Today's headline is "Historic Train Waits at Station for Final Run." Aww...I loved that slow, terrible train..."
  • "Let's see here... Today's headline is "101 Ways to Use a Cork. #52 Will SHOCK You!" Yeah, I read the article. It's mostly about plugging holes so gross stuff can't get out, but #52 SHOCKED me."
  • "One Big Paint Star Still Missing! If anyone can find it, it's you, Mario!"
  • "Let's see here... Today's headline is "Fearsome Fossil Flies—Flees For Fiery Fountain." I think by "fiery fountain" they mean volcano. Silly writers always sacrifice clarity for cleverness..."
  • "Let's see here... Today's headline is "Watch Your Head! Fort Cobalt Cited for Unsafe Trap." Apparently the trap just drops a heavy object on your head. Crude, sure, but I bet it would be good for calming down a rampaging beast."
  • "Let's see here... Today's headline is "Dragon Eats Hamburger." Huh. Slow news day. Now, if he ate one of those super-spicy Magma Burgers from Fort Cobalt, that would be something!"
  • "Let's check the classified ads... "Bottle Opener needed to raise magma level. Must be willing to deliver to Redpepper Volcano.""
  • "Let's see here... "Giant Chunk of Ice in Tangerino Grill Freezer." Hmmm...even if you break it up, it just fixes itself? Maybe a hot wind on it would work."
  • "Let's see here... "Small Pipe in Small Forest." Wow, this is some small print!"
  • "Let's see here... "Green Energy Plant Discovers New Power Source." Now they're playing with power!"
  • "Let's see here... "Mysterious Tent Appears in Mossrock." Hmm... Why would someone set up a tent deep in those woods? Is there going to be some sort of event?"
  • "Let's see here... "Disco Ball Party Leads to Ice Pick Attack." So, wait for them to start dancing, and then use the Ice Pick to... break the ball? Is that a typo?"
  • "Mario, it's a special edition! Check it out! "Six Big Paint Stars Found! Legendary Rainbow Road Appears!" I'd heard rumors about a road made out of rainbows, but I didn't think it was real!"
  • "Let's see here... "Washing Machine Cleans Even the Toughest, Blackest Stains!" So even if something is pitch black with grime, a washing machine can clean it right up! Wait, this isn't news! This is an advertisement!"
  • "Let's see here... "Good Luck, Mario! Beat Bowser and Save Princess Peach!" There's an eight-page article about you in here!"
  • "Prisma Fountain Restored! Game Beaten! Not sure what "game beaten" means, but would you like to watch the Prisma Splash parade again?"