List of Wario: Master of Disguise quotes

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This is a list of quotes from Wario: Master of Disguise.

Count Cannoli[edit]

  • "I blow through like the gentlest breeze, then steal in with the greatest of ease!"
  • "Think I'm a threat? I'd have to concur! Lock your doors! I'm the Silver Zephyr!"
  • "Now...to business! What a luxurious ship! I shall steal its most dazzling treasures!"
  • "Oh, my aching... Who...who are you?"
  • "Oh! And that's MY wand! Give it back! Relinquish it NOW!"
  • "Star? No! You're nobody! Hey! Don't wave that!"
  • "P-Purple Wind?! You're a thief, too?"
  • "HA! I'm superior to you! Even without that wand!"
  • "Wait, no! Oh, my wand! Come back! I really didn't mean it!"
  • "H-Hey! What a foul man! Bring back my wand!"
  • "Oh, I'll strike when you least expect it...thief!"
  • "Last warning! Give that wand back!"
  • "The wand you hold in your filthy hand..."
  • "It's served my family for generations!"
  • "I'd be shamed beyond belief if I lost it! So give it back to me! Immediately!"
  • "Without it, I can't turn into the Silver Zephyr, a thief feared by all!"
  • "And I'll be stuck as myself...the utterly boring Count Cannoli...forever and ever!"
  • "You musn't steal my wand! Or steal my FAME!"
  • "I've got you now!"
  • "Hoodlum! Return my wand!"
  • "You're a slippery one..."
  • "But I'll get you soon!"
  • "Hmmm. Maybe you do have the heart of a thief."
  • "But, Wario, you're no Silver Zephyr!"
  • "Are you kidding? It reeks of inelegance!"
  • "And YOU'RE the dumb one! Just try to survive!"
  • "I've booby-trapped this whole ship already!"
  • "Give me back my wand and I'll let you escape."
  • "Well then, I shall dog your heels, you amateur."
  • "Well, Wario... You've survived a few traps."
  • "That's the last straw! No one insults Cannoli!"
  • "It's time to take back my wand. And my honor!"
  • "No, it can't be..."
  • "W-w-wait! You just want treasure, right?!"
  • "I can help you steal every bit of it from this ship!"
  • "You have my word! Just give me my wand back!"
  • "My family honor depends on keeping that wand!"
  • "It goes WAY back in my family...to my great-, great-, great..."
  • "So I hear. But I can tell that you're...not interested."
  • "You're kidding?! I mean...thank you."
  • "What a fool. That wand is priceless."
  • "I'll just string him along for now."
  • "Purple Wind, you'll soon breathe your last..."

Goodstyle[edit]

  • "Ah, not so hard, sir! Old Goodstyle begs you!"
  • "Oh, my! A NEW master! At your service, sir!"
  • "AH, yes, my new master! And I am known as...Goodstyle!"
  • "With merely a wave and a flourish, I've remade all of my masters!"
  • "Oh, I've changed paupers into princes! And I've turned zeroes into heroes!"
  • "I've even helped many former masters, such as HIM, turn into a master thief!"
  • "So whoever you really want to be... Goodstyle is at your service!"
  • "Ah, but I've jabbered so. Let me simply show you!"
  • "Good day, sir! Care to learn the secrets of thievery? Check out how to suit up. Oh! Check! So funny!"
  • "When disguised as Thief Wario, you can leap to tremendous heights, much like a cat burglar!"
  • "You should leap at every opportunity that comes your way! Your acrobatics are as quick as my puns!"
  • "You also possess a power that's rare among thieves: assault and battery! Fits you well, sir!"
  • "Bash anything that gets in your way! Put the "break" into breaking and entering!"
  • "If you ever need me to explain this all again, simply pause the action! I'll be delighted to assist!"
  • "But do you know how to open it?"
  • "What a novel way for a thief to open chests!"
  • "But it won't work, sir. They're too tough."
  • "Go get a closer look. I'll help pry it open."
  • "Indeed! I'll always tell you when we can begin."
  • "I'll use a picture to keep it short and sweet!"
  • "See? We're ready! Touch it to start!"
  • "Give it a try, sir! But first..."
  • "Hear me out, just a moment longer!"
  • "No, sir. I want every gem you find!"
  • "They're... They're...so delectable!"
  • "But more importantly, they're all Guise Gems!"
  • "Yes! The more I eat, the more disguises I make!"
  • "I can tell you're not going to like this..."
  • "Sir! If I may explain! If I eat those gems..."
  • "I can disguise you in ways that will help!"
  • "You can go more places with more disguises!"
  • "While your Thief Wario disguise will help..."
  • "More disguises will give you many more powers!"
  • "Think of it as an investment, sir!"
  • "I'll note your disguises on the upper screen."
  • "Eventually, you'll have quite a few of them!"
  • "Each gives you powers to start with..."
  • "Then superpowers after I get the right Mastery Gem."
  • "The Thief Wario outfit never upgrades, however!"
  • "Whew! Now go pry open that chest..."
  • "I think there's a tasty Guise Gem inside!"
  • "Cosmic Wario, low gravity awaits you! To suit up for service, draw a helmet on your head!"
  • "Cosmic Wario has the power of laser fire! Isn't technology magnificent? Try it! What straight shots!"
  • "Ah, and may I shoot from the hips with more ideas? Fire the laser at ropes and switches, too!"
  • "Spot on, sir! Attack the bag to get its coins!"
  • "Use different attacks to see which work best!"
  • "Ah, let me fill you in on a little detail about Count Cannoli, sir!"
  • "The Cannoli family also has access to a stockpile of high-tech trickery!"
  • "Good thing all of the machines have serious weaknesses!"
  • "Use your disguises and attacks to take advantage of the flaws!"
  • "I'll give you hints in the lower-left corner. Now good luck! I'm rooting for you, sir!"

Narrator[edit]

  • "We join Wario as he's searching his...er, mind...for ways to get rich."
  • "Our unlikely hero is about to be struck by inspiration from TV..."
  • "Ah, poor guy. And isn't that just the problem! Wario still isn't rich."
  • "A popular TV show about a master thief comes on the air..."
  • "In this show, a somewhat ordinary fellow walks up to a luxury liner..."
  • "Though Wario was trash-talking the TV thief, he really was insanely jealous."
  • "Wario keeps watching, drooling at the thought of being a master thief."
  • "And then it happened! The thief transformed! Wario drooled even more!"
  • "Yes, Wario had come up with one of his...er, brilliant ideas."
  • "Wario enters his secret HQ...er, back room, to make something."
  • "What a racket! What in the world is this idea Wario's come up with?"

Wario[edit]

  • "Bah! No treasure leads on the news!"
  • "Hmmm? What's this?"
  • "Who's this thief? This show looks good! Good way to kill an hour, at least!"
  • "This chump is a thief?"
  • "How's he gonna steal anything if he's dressed like such a bonehead?"
  • "Bah! I want in on the action! This guy ain't worthy!"
  • "Blech! What is this?! Amateur hour? If only... Yeah!! I got an idea!"
  • "I'm a genius! I'm so good I scare myself!"
  • "Yeah! It's done!!"
  • "Ta-dah!"
  • "If that moron can be on TV, so can I! I was born to be on the boob tube!"
  • "Behold the Telmet!"
  • "Television! Teleportin'! And, uh, it's a helmet."
  • "Let's fire this baby up!"
  • "It's meeee! On TeeeVeeee!"
  • "Whadda entrance! And for my big break in TV, too!"
  • "It worked! I'm a genius! I'm on that dork's show!"
  • "Hey, and ain't THAT extra-lucky! That Silver Heifer guy dropped his wand!"
  • "Don't know what this wand is good for, but at least I can scratch my back with it!"
  • "Or wait...it's good for somethin', right, shmancy-pants?"
  • "Who am I? ME?! I'm the star of this here show now...Wario!"
  • "Do I gotta beat it into your head? I'm Wario!"
  • "Wow! A talking wand! And it calls ME sir?!"
  • "Check out these duds! Now all's I need is a fancy name like the Silver Zipper..."
  • "Umm... Lemme see, I could be... No, that's not it. Maybe... Ha! Got it!!"
  • "The Purple Wind! Yes! Silent but deadly!"
  • "Good! Cuz you're not getting Goodstyle back!"
  • "Ah, bug off already! OK, Goodstyle..."
  • "Now that I'm all geared up, let's bust this ship open!"
  • "My first chest!"
  • "This Purple Wind stuff is already paying off!"
  • "Wha-! Oh, Goodstyle... It's you."
  • "These puny chests? I'll smash 'em open!"
  • "Then what do I gotta do?"
  • "Close enough for ya?"
  • "Spit it out! You want my autograph?"
  • "Guise Gems?"
  • "Who cares?!! This thief getup is good enough!"
  • "I'm keepin' all gems for myself. For ME!"
  • "Help Wario find MORE treasure?"
  • "I don't like the idea of losing treasure. But..."
  • "Count Cannoli? What a dumb name! Look who's a nobody now!"
  • "You're not getting this wand back!"
  • "Not gonna happen, chump!"
  • "What have we here?! A sack of cash!"
  • "What a dumb thief name! Purple Wind is better!"
  • "LET ME?!"
  • "I'll LET YOU keep that fancy hat, how's that?!"
  • "Traps? Those explosions? Thought I had gas? HA!"
  • "You fancy-pants freak! Just try it, Cannoli!"
  • "SMELL IT!"
  • "Silent but deadly! Smell the Purple Wind!"
  • "Bye, loser! I'm off to get rich!"
  • "This wand...instead of ALL the treasure?"
  • "Can it, Cannoli! Boo-hoo! Cry me a river! I don't care how great your family is!"
  • "I just want treasure! And lots of it! Hmm...you think there's a ton of it here?"
  • "Trying to read my mind, Cannoli? Don't bother! You'll find NOTHING!"
  • "But you got a deal. You help me get treasure. I give you the wand."