The 'Shroom:Issue L
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| Issue L | May 21st, 2011 | About |
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| MrConcreteDonkey | Turboo | Tucayo | |||
| Xzealio | Neurario | Xpike | |||
| Ralphfan |
Director's Notes
Oh wow, look at that awesome artwork that Edofenrir (talk) made for Issue L! This is a picture taken of how the planning for this Special Issue went for about the past month. No, seriously, it was crazy and hectic (but extremely fun) to get the issue out this month. Anyway, on to what I need to tell you all. This month, I have a lot of news to share.
I will start off with the Feedback Survey: it has started! This survey was produced with piles of effort and time from the Core Staff poured into it, because we feel that our users should get the best that we can serve. So please help us to improve the quality of the paper and take the survey! We will assess the results next month after the release of Issue LI, so we should start implementing whatever changes need to made starting then. A link has also been added to the {{Shroomfooter}}, so you do not necessarily need to go back to the Front Page every single time you want to view the article about it. If you need assistance with something on the survey, be sure to check in with Ralphfan (talk), who is in charge of this particular project.
To bring an update on the status of our pending affiliates, I must announce that Stooben Rooben (talk) is the new Affiliates Manager! From now on, he has the duty of representing the interests of the Core Staff to those projects and websites that are interested in affiliating with us. So if you feel you want to suggest some affiliations for The 'Shroom, he is the man to contact. He has already started carrying out the functions of his position by contacting the sites that we are considering for affiliation, so I am certain he will continue his great job.
The Section of the Month project has begun! Congratulations to Gamefreak75 (talk) for being the first writer to ever have their section receive the award, as well as Marioguy1 (talk) and MrConcreteDonkey (talk) for getting Honorable Mentions. It was a tough choice for the staff to choose between the three, quite honestly. But yes, for those who did not get this award: do not be discouraged! Now that this process has started, it will continue for every single issue from this point on. You will have many chances to achieve this.
Also, we have a new project that has come along for the paper: The 'Shroom Spotlight! The purpose of the project is to help increase user productivity on articles that cover the games in the Mario-series. This project will run independently from the monthly release schedule that the newspaper follows and will be managed by Xzelion (talk) (who pretty much fathered the concept behind the project), although there will be a monthly section in the paper that covers month-to-month updates on the Spotlight that Xzelion will also be in charge of writing. So if you have any questions about this, contact him!
As you can probably tell by now, the chat party that was in the planning stages as of last month ended up being cancelled. However, do not worry: in lieu of this chat party, the Core Staff is planning on investing time into a debate for the Poll Chairperson Election (information on the election itself can be found below). The date and time of this event is not exactly known as of now, but an update will be brought to you next month on the topic.
Some news on the 'Shroom Mafia II game: it will begin during the first week of June. This is so that Stooben's game will be able to run its course a bit longer, and so that a little extra time can go into planning our game. Tucayo (talk) is in charge of the game and also has taken up the responsibility of writing a section about the game. So if you want to sign up, be sure to head on over to the forum and make a post clearly stating that you are interested!
Another superb update to be brought forth: the Awards Committee has agreed to include ten 'Shroom Awards in this year's ceremony! It was after a lot of talking and bringing up suggestions that the idea was approved, and I am certain that this expansion will be in the best interests of both The 'Shroom and the Awards Show. So when the time comes next month: be sure to vote on all of the awards! This change will only remain for 'Shroom Awards III (which takes place in the 2012 Anniversary) if the additions prove to be beneficial!
Coming up next month is the Poll Chairperson Election! For those of you who were around last year during the first Chairperson election, you will probably remember how this process goes. For those who were not around, the Poll Committee is the group of users that decides which polls go on the Main Page every two weeks. The members of the Committee are selected by the Poll Committee Chairperson, who is elected by the users of the wiki in an annual election. The first election happened in June last year, and so it will have been a year when June of this year rolls around. The current Chairperson (who just so happens to be me) will have the option of running again. Although I have already determined whether or not I will run for a second term, I will not announce my decision until the Issue LI comes out (which also happens to be when the election starts).
Anyway, back to the topic of this issue. I am highly, highly impressed by everybody that helped make Issue L what it is, and I thank everybody that contributed to the project. An extreme amount of thanks and appreciation to the Core Staff, for putting in a painstaking amount of time, work, and effort into making sure everything got done and for helping me in what I needed to do. I thank the writers, for sending in their well-prepared and awesome sections this month. A special thanks to the Special Guest Writers, for taking the time to produce high-quality, significant sections for the issue. And a high amount of thanks to the readers, for who the entire newspaper is for. I feel that this is the best issue of The 'Shroom of all time, thanks to all of the participants.
The next issue will be released on June 18th, 2011. Be sure to come back and read Issue LI, which will contain updates on topics which will have updates in store, as well as some of the other various projects and events listed above.
Until next month,
Sub-director Notes
Fake News
Editorial
Hello there, readers.
I am pleased to see you found your way to this place. This is the Jubilee Fake News, here to celebrate the ’Shroom’s special month. From when the general idea was born in 2006 until now, fifty issues have been planned, produced, and submitted, thanks to a lot of ambitious people who decided to channel their craziness into something that people might find enjoyable. There were times when this worked out pretty well, and other times when it flopped horribly and left a somewhat embarrassing aftertaste. But all of this shall not bug us now. Did you know that, while there were indeed fifty issues of the ’Shroom, not every one of those issues had Fake News? This means that “Jubilee Fake News” is a huge misnomer, since this is not the fiftieth Fake News at all. Now, some of you will now say that this is lame. I say it is perfect. Because if you think about it, what is better suited for the Fake News than a fake jubilee?
Anyway, we have a huge number of various doodads and distractions around for this issue, some of which are a Mafia/Werewolf/Whatever‐you‐wanna‐call‐it on the Forums, a survey, and all that other stuff that SMB probably talked about earlier. And while all of that is nice, it cannot replace the things that make a strong issue, and what allowed us to last this long: the content itself. That’s what we’re here for this month: Good old‐fashioned writing.
If you browsed over this site already, you may have noticed a few things that are different. My personal objective in the past month was to give the Fake News a cosmetic makeover. It is not much, but I hope it will serve to make our issues a bit more colorful, as well as more appealing for both readers and writers. I have also assigned new names to most of our current sections, to give us the opportunity for a fresh start into the next fifty issues of the ’Shroom (that might or might not exist). I also substituted as a writer for some sections that currently have no writers, to make this incarnation of the Fake News as rich as possible.
So, to summarize everything I just said in a short statement, which I admittedly could have done in the first place to go easy on your nerves, although I have no idea what you’re doing here if you’re afraid of reading: This issue is gonna be big. Really big. We hope you will enjoy reading it. And a happy ’Shroobilee to everyone.
Written by: 
Gamefreak75 (talk)
On Thursday, 5/XX/20XX, Gourmet Guy held his first annual cook‐off, sponsored by Bowser’s 2011 Spring Vacation Getaway (tickets are still on sale). Many cooks, legends and amateurs, participated, but only three chefs made it to the final round. Before we continue, let’s get some background information on the finalists:
- Chef Kawasaki
- Age: Unknown
- Residence: Dreamland
- Hobbies: Cooking
- Chef Goomba
- Age: 35 years old
- Residence: Currently unknown
- Hobbies: Cooking, fighting bad guys, saving the Mushroom Kingdom from danger
The judges for the finals were hand‐picked off the street gourmet connoisseurs. Wario, that one bean seller guy outside of Zora’s River or whatever the heck it’s called, and Louie were the perfect judges, as quoted by Gourmet Guy himself. The contestants were given five hours to prepare a three‐course meal: one appetizer, one entrée, and one dessert. After five hours, the chefs had to stop and present the food to the judge. They were judged on taste of the meal and its general appearance.
First up was Tayce T. and her world‐famous Hot Shroom for the appetizer, a Shroom Steak for the main course, and a delicious Shroom Cake to top it off. The judges’ responses were rather positive.
Wario: The variety of the food is limited, but the taste is marvelous. It could’ve used some garlic. I give you an 8.
Bean Seller Guy: I agree with fatty on this one. I give you an 8.
Louie: This is a lot better than the crap they server on my planet. I give you a 10.
Gourmet Guy: And with that, we add the score, giving Tayce T a 26/30. Well done!
Second, was Chef Kawasaki of Dreamland. His appetizer was some mashed potatoes topped with curry. For the entrée, he created what appears to be ramen with some… rather off‐putting miscellaneous objects inside… and for dessert, he created what he claims to be pie, but it looks more like he scooped out sewage from the sewers and plopped it onto a pie tin. Is that even real pie crust he was using?! The judges’ comments… went about as well as you’d expect them to…
Wario: I should have you thrown into the dungeon for this crap! I give you a 1.
Bean Seller: Is this… is this pie even edible? Is this sludge not poisonous? Is this pie crust not fake? Is giving you a 1 justifiable? The answer to all those questions is “YES”.
Louie: YUCK! GROSS! NASTY! TASTELESS! TREEEEEASON!!!! I give you a 0.
Gourmet Guy: What a disappointment. Kawasaki finishes with only a measly 2/30 points.
And now for the final contestant: Chef Goomba. For the first dish, he created a lavish onion blossom. What talent! For the main dish, he made some lobster, served with a plate of fries and some lemon butter. And for dessert, the masterful chef created an extravagant tiramisu. The judges’ jaws dropped in such astonishment, it’s as if they could break a column of bricks. The judges’ opinions were…
Wario: Talk about showy. I don’t even have to try the food to know it’s going to taste good. I’ll have a taste anyways! Definitely a 10.
Bean Seller: What fatso to my right said. A well‐deserved 10.
Louie: DAMMIT! GIVE ME YOUR RECIPES!!!! A 10.
Gourmet Guy: Adding up the score, Chef Goomba gets a… wow… a PERFECT SCORE!
Chef Goomba was awarded 5000 coins for his win as well as a blue ribbon. The two losers got 100 coins for being good sports, though.
And thus, that concluded Gourmet Guy’s First Annual Cook‐Off. We hope to see you all next year.
On Wednesday the 11th, around 10:30 am, a young boy was sentenced to three years of prison. The charge: Leaving his home. Little Prince Mallow, son of the ruler of Nimbus Land, was running a shopping errand when the police force arrived and immediately arrested the cloud prince for copyright infringement. A Japanese entertainment company called Square Enix had apparently filed a lawsuit against him. According to property laws, Square Enix seems to be the copyright holder regarding Mallow’s entire existence, and as such, showing his face in public equals a severe contractual violation. The accused was quoted upon his apprehension saying: “I— I just went to the store across the street to buy a pack of bubble gum!! I didn’t know that was bad!! I was… I did… I… I… ” A more detailed statement could not be recorded due to a violent rainstorm that suddenly started. Unfortunately, some complications occurred while the prince was carried off to jail. The police car was attacked by Mallow’s acquaintance and fellow notorious copyright violator Geno. Together they managed to get away.
Both escapees are currently on the run. The public is advised to be extremely cautious, as they are both dangerous. Prince Mallow is known for his magical prowess that makes the weather bend to his will, and even more so for his infamous ability to detach his body from his pants. Keep him away from your frail old grandma. His accomplice, Geno, is a possessed doll, which is already unsettling on its own. He can also transform into a cannon and shoot the sun at you. Note: While both criminals are certainly threats, it should also be known that their level caps at 30. If you are not a character from Super Mario RPG or the first installment of Paper Mario, you can be at ease.
The police ask for the assistance of the public in apprehending the escaped criminals. If you come across any leads that hint at their whereabouts, please contact the authorities. Don’t engage in any vigilante activities, no matter how tempting the experience points may seem. Life offers much more precious things than stats, such as… and… uhm… bubble gum… Just don’t do it, ok? That’s all.
Welcome, readers, to the fake weather forecast, where nothing actually is fake except our apparent perpetual happiness! This month, though, we will also be the bearer of some grave news: The sun, beloved by millions, has stopped shining during the day, and is now lighting the sky exclusively at night. Expert Shine scholars have determined that the problem at hand has nothing to do with Shine Sprites at all. This leaves expert Shine scholars completely clueless, since they are only able to recognize problems that are related to Shine Sprites, and are otherwise utterly useless. A Toad mother later reported to the police that her daughter was to blame. The kid hadn’t finished her dinner and, according to her mother, might have enraged the sun that way. The police, rational as usual, immediately ordered their men to arrest every child whose plate hadn’t been emptied properly the previous day. Soon someone pointed out that the disobedient children theory did not explain why the sun would shine at night. The people, having run out of insane ways to make abysmally false but still somewhat entertaining assumptions, gave up investigating and just went and asked the sun. The sun then explained that it had a talk with the moon, the moon was angry, and it expressed its jealousy of the sun because there was nothing good on TV to watch at night. The sun then assured the moon that there wasn’t anything good on TV during the day either, and opted the two to change shifts to prove it. Their arrangement is set to expire at the end of the month, and things will presumably return to normal then.
| 1st Week | 2nd Week | 3rd Week | 4th Week |
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And now for the tv show weather forecast:
The quality drought of our overall program proves itself to be persistent and continues to hold our televisions in a fast stranglehold. The general climate is composed of old game show reruns, with the occasional soap opera precipitation. It is advised to keep an umbrella in close proximity (to switch channels in emergency situations when the remote control stops working). The clouds in the east still refuse to leave and yield reality shows about people like you and me that nobody wants to see. A morality low is coming in from the west and brings along a wave of TV scams and call-in shows. Please hold on to your purse and stay away from any telephone. As for the south: a huge talk show storm is brewing over Yoshi's Island. The whole place has therefore been put under quarantine. If you planned to go there, please don't, cancel your trip, stay at home, and don't look directly into your TV. That will be all.
Introducing a new sport that’s gripping the nation … Guntherball!
- audience claps*
- Gamefreak glares angrily*
The game, named after its original champion, consists of ten players. It is an individual competition in which one player tries to hit a football with a hockey stick and run around the four bases while the other nine players try to pick up the ball and throw it at the baserunner. The baserunner has to kick a soccer ball into a goal at first base, dunk a basketball at second base and roll a strike at third base while dodging sand traps and water hazards. Upon arriving at home plate, they must consume one (1) churro.
At this year’s world championship, held in the Forest of Illusion, Gunther once again advanced to the finals, hoping to win a third consecutive title. The championship match was a thriller, as Gunther outscored Wario, Yoshi, DK, Daisy, Toadsworth, Kamek and Waluigi, but there was one man that stood in his path, a man so glorious that nobody could defeat him…
We’re making a dramatic pause…
Kim Jong‐il! The Dear Leader is the champion!
Written by: 
MrConcreteDonkey (talk)
Deep in the sewers of Mushroom City are four crime‐fighting, pizza‐delivering, teenage Koopa Troopas, who somehow have a show – yes, I’m talking about Teenage Mutant Ninja Koopa Troopas.
The show has four main stars:
- Beethoven – The blue one. He is the leader of the team. He is described by many as “stuck in the 80s”, possibly related to the fact that he’s been sent back in time to the 80s (by a cursed radio program nobody from this time period likes), where he shared a house with Michael Jackson for six months. Look in the music video for Smooth Criminal, because he’s not there. He’s the third strongest of the team.
- Mozart – The red one. Worked for NASA in the past, performed MiRaClEs :o), blah blah. You probably don’t want to hear about that, keep moving people. Oh yeah he’s the third strongest.
- Tchaikovsky – The orange one. Picked on by the others due to his long name, which he finds unfair as the real composer, Tchaikovsky, never had this problem. Bullied by five‐year‐olds, to the extent that his mother had to write a complaint to Playhouse Disney. He isn’t the first, second or fourth strongest. And if you think he’s the fifth, you probably don’t even know the meaning of the word ‘math’.
- Debussy – The purple one. Often described as the ‘geek’ of the group, he is an avid collector of Star Wars figures and Star Trek episodes with no mention of the word ‘yellow’. He is between the fourth and second strongest.
In the most recent episode, an evil plumber has been jumping on the Shellcreepers and Sidesteppers in the sewers, so the Koopa Troopas decide to show him who’s boss. The show is shown on the channel that shows many other kids’ shows, Mushroom Kids, and is shown at 9:00, 10:00 and 11:00, being shown inbetween a couple of other shows on this channel that shows many shows. Don’t miss it, or else your name is entered into a competition and you could become the next villain the Koopas fight, and that will somehow bring humiliation. Thanks for reading, and see you next month.
After Mementoot – Death of a Trumpet and Low Blow, we are now about to witness the release of the latest album of known wonder musician Hully Bully. His new album is called There He Blows. Once again the musician's stunning performance with his iconic trumpet will bewitch you, and then haunt you day and night. Especially night. Song for song, the album tells a story about a young country bumpkin called Buck Blowhard, whose carefree life ends abruptly when a whale driving a tank waltzes through his farm and kidnaps his wife. Grieving over the loss, Buck decides to become Captain Blowbuck, a whaler who travels the seven seas and who hunts whales with his trumpet music instead of a harpoon. It just blows your mind.
This album comes with 13 unique songs for everyone who loves getting blasted into the ear by wind instruments.
- Peace Under the Hills with Silly Ol' Eyebrows
- One of Us Must Blow
- Hay Lady Hay
- Is It Blowing, Buck?
- If Whales Were Tanks
- Broken Blow Shuffle
- I Was the Boozer
- Blow Bird
- Ain't Got No Blow
- I'm Blowing On
- Four Whales
- We Need a Whole Lot More of Trumpets
- Commotion
So in conclusion there is only one last thing to say about this experience: It certainly blows.
DISCLAIMER: Before you cry Never Say Die, the game is already E 10+ for implying it.)
Hi, qrs22 here, with a new title for the 3DS – “Save Luigi”!
The story:
Lately, Luigi’s lack of love has left him lonely. (Try saying that five times fast.) To him, it seems as if no one pays him any attention – or would care if he never existed. One day, while Mario is napping, Luigi leaves him a notes and goes out for a walk. Later, Mario wakes up and reads the note.
Dear Bro,
I have decided to take a long walk – off a short pier. I’ll be hearing from you in that great Italian restaurant in the sky.
Love, Your Bro
Mario’s eyes fill with tears as he heads out to, well, save Luigi.
The game:
You (Mario) have to go through the original Super Mario Bros game from 1‐1 to 8‐4 with a different objective: protecting Luigi from, ahem, letting himself go. There are different cutscenes for different, erm, passings away. For example, when Bowser “does away” with Luigi with one of his fireballs, the cutscene shows Mario giving Bowser a dirty look, but Bowser claims to just be “doing his job.”
The end:
Luigi ― Wow, you went all that way to save my life?
Mario ― Mm‐hmm.
Luigi ― Oh, I love you, man!
*Luigi hugs Mario and starts to cry*
Mario ― Ha ha!
Well, that’s it for this month! See you next time!
Written by: Gamefreak75 (talk)
We have three special guests today who will be showing you three different meals! Allow me to introduce, Tayce T., Chef Kawasaki, and Chef Goomba! Let us first begin with Tayce T’s demonstration.
First, you’ll need:
- An Ultra Shroom
- An oven
- Some Red Berries
- It is recommended that the mushroom is as tender as possible. The more tender it is, the juicier it will be.
- Preheat the oven to 425 and place the shroom in it for approximately 30 minutes.
- While it is cooking, place the berries in a bowl and mash them until they form a smooth, non‐pulpy, mix.
- Simmer the berry puree in a pan for 10 minutes or until it is warm.
- Once the Shroom Steak is out of the oven, pour the berry sauce on it and viola, a delicious meal is ready for consumption.
Kawasaki will show us how to make his, uh, delicious(?) ramen:
First, you’ll need:
- Noodles
- Hot water
- Hot sauce
- A large bowl
- Seaweed
- Mushrooms
- Crab claw
- Onions
- Chicken
- Pineapple
- Any other items you see lying around in your fridge or pantry
- First, you should heat the water until it comes to a boil.
- Add the noodles and stir for a few minutes
- Add hot sauce for extra flavor
- Throw in everything you can find, it doesn’t matter what crap is in there
- Mix all the ingredients for a good 5 minutes until the noodles absorb the plethora of flavors
- Pour all the contents in a large bowl and serve with chopsticks
- Add a note to enlighten those who are insane enough to eat your food: 貴様よ、そのラーメンをお楽しみください。
And finally, we have Chef Goomba showing us how to make his dish.
You’ll need:
- A lobster
- A lemon
- Some butter
- Potatoes
- Seasonings
- A knife
- Boiling hot water
- A large saucepan
- An oven
- First, make sure the water is boiling hot and that the oven is preheated to 400. Add the lobster into the water once it is boiling.
- While the lobster is being boiled, cut the potato(es) into small fries.
- Once the oven is ready, add some seasoning onto the potatoes and stuff them in the oven. Set the timer for 30 minutes.
- When the fries are almost done, melt some butter.
- After the butter has been melted, add a dash of lemon into it to give it that lemon‐butter taste (this should be fairly obvious)
- Once the lobster is done, place it on a large plate, along with the fries and the lemon butter.
- Voila. A fantastic meal has been prepared.
Written by: Gamefreak75 (talk)
Hello, my faithful customers.
There is no better way to kick of the ’Shroom’s birthday with a bang than with Bob‐ombs. These small explosives are easy to carry and come in many different sizes.
Using the bob‐omb is very simple. All you need to do is light it and then chuck it at a designated object. It’s not rocket science, so even the most brain‐dead of creatures can use this versatile item.
As you can see, these spherical explosives pack quite a punch and can demolish nearly anything!
Is there a swarm of enemies that need to be taught a lesson? Rodents in your cannons? Are there some foes that need to be taught a lesson? What better way than to accomplish all these worthless tasks than with a Bob‐Omb!
Supplies are limited, so order them while you can.
Helpful Advice:
- Do not leave near any flammable objects.
- It is recommended children below the age of 18 do not play with these objects.
- Do not hold in front of face when lit.
- Do not place in microwave or oven.
- Do not try to cook the bob‐omb.
- The bob‐omb is not a toy.
- Use bombs wisely.
- Do a barrel roll.
Hey, everybody. This is PyroGuy6 with the next interview. This month, we will be interviewing Shy Ranger! ……………………… …………………………………………………………………………Get out here, now. Yeah, I know you’re rare. WILL YOU JUST GET OUT HERE?!?
Pyro: Finally. What were you doing in there?
Shy Ranger: Putting my camouflage on.
Pyro: Speaking of camouflage, why do you wear camouflage?
Shy Ranger: Back when I was just a boy in the Pipe Vault…my mom told me to wear camouflage in public for no apparent reason.
Pyro: Please, interviews are not supposed to include emo stories.
Shy Ranger: Sorry.
Pyro: Why do you usually run away from battle?
Shy Ranger: My worst fear is Geno. He’s crazy, man. He’s the whole reason us Shy Rangers are endangered.
Pyro: Endangered?
Shy Ranger: Yeah, endangered. Everyone beats us up to level up and learn Ultra Flame.
Pyro: What happens if you attack?
Shy Ranger: I’ve taken a lot of classes on rock firing, so I never miss. Want me to show you?
Pyro: That won’t be necessary, thank you.
Shy Ranger: Aww, I wanted to hit that annoying Goomba over there in the audience.
Pyro: How are you immune to Yoshi Cookies?
Shy Ranger: If I take my camouflage off, there’s metal. But that’s my private part.
Pyro: Why do you have such low magic defense?
Shy Ranger: It’s complicated. I usually took classes on special defense.
Pyro: Other Shy Rangers think “Transmitting information. Over and out”. Explanation?
Shy Ranger: Recent Shy Rangers have wires in them. No Shy Ranger is organic.
Pyro: You’re a robot?
Shy Ranger: Yeah.
Pyro: Well, that’s about it. I’m PyroGuy6, and this is Shy Ranger. See you next month, everyone.
Written by: MrConcreteDonkey (talk)
Toad Town, 200 years ago, was filled to the brim with criminals. Goombas, Koopa Troopas, Lakitus… these criminals were led by none other than the rogue cowboy, Plumpbody Wario, and his sidekick, Lanky Waluigi. A hero was needed to free the Toads in the town from these evil men…
Then, a man called Luigi came to town, and, due to a long series of events, became Sheriff Luigi.
When he arrived in the town, Sheriff Luigi was a lonely man. He rode in bravely on his Yoshi, and, being an alcoholic, decided to go to the pub. Little did he know that he was in the middle of a large robbery by the Wario & Waluigi enemy party van honk evil yellow whatever…… in other words, there were a couple of Goombas and a Shy Guy. The future sheriff, really in need of his beer, decided to jump on the three evil… thingies… the town then regarded him as a hero, despite having to clean up flattened Goombas and a man riding a Shy Guy.
Soon, Wario learned about Luigi’s interfering, grabbed his trusty shotgun, and ate it. Luigi then got a pair of trick handcuffs, went to Wario and handcuffed him to a post. Wario didn’t figure out how to get out, so he was there when Luigi got back, drunk, and freed him. But then Wario was transported to another dimension along with all his consorts and Waluigi. Luigi was then awarded Sheriff because of his fantastic Shy Guy riding skills giving him national fame.
Thank you for reading my section; I’m hoping to resign from Fake Characters, so this may well be the last time you see me writing it. Don’t worry, I’ll still be writing Fake TV and Should Have Been, and will still be around on the Wiki, forum and chat.
For this month, we from the ’Shroom Fake News are throwing our glance at a quirky shop somewhere along the confusing maze of streets and alleys that is Mushroom City: The Wall‐Mart. Here at the Wall‐Mart, one can find anything you need for your daily life at low prices. That is, if you are a Thwomp. If you’re not, most of the stuff they sell will be useless to you.
We spoke to the founder of the Wall‐Mart company, a Thwomp who goes by the name of Slam Fallton. We asked him what inspired him to create this project. “Grack! Thanks for asking, puny little water bag. When I was a little pebble, no kid ever wanted to play with me. Well, ok, some did, but then there were those accidents when we played leapfrog, and… anyway. My only real friend was a coin. He was always there for me, listened when I talked to him, and he didn’t mind me crashing down on him because he was already flat. But then there was that one day, I was very hungry, and so… I… I used him to… buy a sandwich… This is the one thing in my life I regret the most… And so, to atone for what I did, I decided to liberate all the coins that are currently forced into slavery by greedy people who shamelessly use them as currency! I can and I will not stand for this madness! Therefore, I created this shop where we sell useless trash to idiots who report stuff for newspapers! I will collect all the coins in the world to make them free! All of them! By the way, do you fancy buying something?”
Here is a random assortment of some of Wall‐Mart’s iconic articles:
| Image | Item Name | Cost | Description |
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Rust Shroom | 30 Coins | This metallic fungus is ideal for situations where a light meal just is not enough. It comes in a unique flavor and provides your body with a healthy portion of iron. Dental consultation is recommended after ingestion. |
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Concrete Flower | 25 Coins | Also known as “Flora of the Street”, this rock‐hard plant is a favorite among people with allergies and construction workers alike. It is not as wimpy as those other plants that succumb to frost, but it doesn’t smell as nicely either. |
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Crack‐a Cola | 60 Coins | A dark, sugary beverage that comes in stylish cans and is popular among the young. Its distinct color and texture comes from its secret ingredient: Coal. |
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Sandwich | 105 Coins | A tasty snack that goes along well with other delicacies such as sand cakes, sand pies, and sand castles. It originally cost less than that, but recent amendments by the princess have put taxes on all groan‐inducing puns in product names. |
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Brick Block | 10 Coins | I have no idea why we ordered these… A strange scrawny man wearing a silly hat and a yellow cape sold them to us about a year ago, claiming it as a big business opportunity. They have been here ever since… |
As you may have noticed, it is slowly getting warmer lately. In the near future, the sun will most likely intensify its light, the streets will fill with the sound of happy children, and Zingers will be all over your dinner. Indeed, summer is coming. As everyone should agree, summer is a most vile and merciless season who likes nothing more than torturing us because it is jealous of winter’s serene beauty and undeniable coolness.
For all those coldness enthusiasts who just can’t stand that hideous drought in between two perfect winters, we from the ’Shroom have checked out a lovely vacation spot on the outskirts of the Mushroom Kingdom: Fahr Outpost! In this lovely estate, temperature hardly ever rises above the freezing point. You can engage in fun activities, like building snowmen, hiding in self‐made igloos, or eating space food from the local hotel. Speaking of the hotel, the beds are exquisite and comfy. You will sleep like a frozen turkey on them. They are so comfortable, not even an obese man repeatedly stepping on your face will be able to wake you up, or at least unless he tried several times.
All in all, this is a unique vacation opportunity right here. In the words of one of the locals: “Huh. Oh, da, da, this is Fahr Outpost. Very boring. What? Travel? Tourism? Here? Nyet, nothing here for tourists. Why come to this place? It’s too cold. You would be mad to come here if you’re used to much sun. We also don’t like outsiders. Go away. This is Fahr Outpost and there is nothing here. Especially no giant cannon, nyet.”
Book your flight now, and you will receive your very own “Ice is Nice” t‐shirt for free. Nothing is more intense than standing in a blizzard while wearing nothing but this shirt.
Written by: 
MST3K (talk) (usually)
MST3K did not receive any questions this month and was therefore unable to submit anything.
If you have a forum account, please help the Fake News by sending questions to MST3K via PM
Fun Stuff
Director Notes
by Gamefreak75 (talk)
Hey guys! Today is the Shroom’s 50th issue! :O
I would like to thank everyone who added the extra time and effort in their sections for the 50th issue. I would also like to thank Edofenrir (talk) for his help and contributions to this month’s issue. Surprisingly, considering how lazy I am, I decided to do some fun sections as well. Can you solve all the puzzles and games without cheating? :o
Mystery ImagesHello awesome readers! I am your also-awesome writer, Tucayo! I have some issues I would like to address this month too. First of all, I want to thank everyone for their undying support towards me and the Mystery Images section. Why am I thanking you now? Well, because 3 years ago (May 8th) I signed up for this section, and since then I have gladly brought it to you for 36 consecutive issues. Thanks. And the other thing is a small apology, because my Paint acted weird and didn’t let me remove transparency from image 2 and on. Oh, almost forgot to mention this… This month we have 10 Mystery Images to celebrate the 50th Issue of the Super Mario Wiki’s ’Shroom!
Triviaby Mario Fan 123 (talk) Hello again, dear readers! This issue, we are celebrating The Shroom’s 50th birthday, yippee! It’s an honor to contribute on this lovely day. Now, to the trivia, this time in 10 parts instead of 5! Did you know that…
See you next-a time! |
Quizby Fawfulfury65 (talk)  This month’s quiz questions are from a variety of games! Good luck!
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Guess Whoby Reversinator (talk) OneI was created by a great inventor TwoMy only appearance is in a spin-off ThreeI am the final boss FourI am a phantom FiveI come from another planet
Crossword Puzzleby Gamefreak75 (talk)
Word Search
by Gamefreak75 (talk)
Find the Difference
Answers:
Hiding KoopaBy General bob-omb (talk)
Answer: [2] | |||
Music & Artwork
Director’s Notes (Fawfulfury65)
Hello everyone! If you haven’t noticed already, this month’s ’Shroom is the 50th issue. Therefore, to make Music & Artwork extra special, every section in it is filled in, even if no particular user has been hired for the writing position! So, take a look at all of the sections and enjoy!
If you would like to write for the ’Shroom, don’t hesitate to look on the sign up page. The vacant sections for Music & Art include: Character Artwork of the Month, Soundtrack of the Month, Box-Art of the Month, and Photoshopped Image of the Month. If you would like to write for one of these sections, please contact me about it.
Also, from now on, I am allowing anyone to write for the Sketch Related to Mario! If you send me a Mario-related drawing or sketch of yours, I will put it in the Sketch Related to Mario section. This way, you can find several different artworks from a variety of users each month!
Hope you enjoy the 50th issue!
Character Artwork of the Month (Fawfulfury65)
This month’s Character Artwork is a picture of Mario, Luigi, and Starlow during the events of Mario & Luigi: Bowser’s Inside Story. In this artwork, Luigi is mounted on Mario’s back, while Starlow is apparently startled at something. Ever since I first saw this artwork, I’ve liked it quite a lot. It has a cool art style and the characters are drawn exceptionally well. It seems to be extremely difficult to draw. I also like how colorful it is and how well shaded the characters are. The file is also very high quality and pretty big. This is definitely a great artwork for this month’s issue!
Boxart of the Month (Fawfulfury65)
This month’s Box-Art of the Month is from the North American version of the Super Nintendo Entertainment System game, Donkey Kong Country 3: Dixie Kong’s Double Trouble! As the game’s name suggests, it is the third game in the Donkey Kong Country series, which features Dixie Kong and her little cousin, Kiddy Kong, who both go on an adventure across the Northern Kremisphere. These two characters can be seen in the very front of the box-art, alongside a few enemies, a Banana Bird, and Funky Kong. Not only are a handful of characters on this fantastic box-art, but there is also a lot of detail and colors. You can see a few of the areas from the game on it too, such as a Brothers Bear cabin and Funky’s Rentals. Additionally, the picture is very big and high-quality. To sum everything up, this box-art is absolutely fantastic and is very fitting for such a great game.
Sketches Related to Mario (Fawfulfury65)
This month’s Sketch Related to Mario will now feature several drawings from a variety of users. If you would like your drawing to appear in the next issue, send it to me in a PM!
Artwork 1 by: Edofenrir (talk)
Artwork 2 by: Chivi-chivik (talk)
This is a Super Paper Mario related sketch. It shows Mario, Luigi, Peach and Bowser looking and talking about the Trial Stew.
Artwork 3 by: MST3K (talk)
Here’s a little something I doodled a while back. 
Screenshot of the Month (Fawfulfury65)
Welcome back to the ’Shroom’s Screenshot of the Month, with your host, Fawfulfury65! Since this month’s ’Shroom is issue L, I decided to pick an image with Luigi in it. This picture displays the mustached sidekick hero standing on a grassy planet during the events of Super Mario Galaxy 2. In the background, one can see a canopy and large amounts of sunlight that pass through it. The sunlight makes the image very flashy and cool. Along with these several neat aspects of the image, it is also very high in quality and big. Well, that’s about it. Tune it next month for another great Screenshot of the Month!
Soundtrack of the Month (Fawfulfury65)
For the 50th issue of the ’Shroom, I chose a piece of music from the recent Nintendo DS game, Mario vs. Donkey Kong: Mini-Land Mayhem! This is one of my favorite video game themes, which plays in the final world of the game. I find it to be very unique compared to the other themes in Mini Land Mayhem!, as it is a little slower and uses a lot of band instruments. I especially like the sound of the brass instrument (I’m assuming it’s a tuba or another low brass instrument) in the background that plays the bass part. It is a very exciting piece of music and fits the setting perfectly.
Sprite of the Month (FunkyK38)
For the ’Shroom’s 50th issue, I thought it would be good to go back in time to an era where 8-bit gaming was the latest technology… Here’s Super Mario from Super Mario Bros. 3. 
Sometimes it might seem that Mario’s gone so far forward from where he once was, but it’s always good to see a classic picture of him.
Music Factoid (SimeaMorgana)
Now, for the 50th issue of the ’Shroom, I present you the best of Super Mario music, with an impression of the old traditional Japanese/ Chinese music style! Here are six wonderful, master-rendered pieces!
1. Super Mario Land, Chai Kingdom
We all know it, we all love it. This is one of the Mario ‘classics’, it perfectly reflects the glory and majesty of the Chinese Empire! Just take your time, listen to it carefully and dive into the most intense feelings of nostalgia!
2. Paper Mario, The Master
A true martial arts master also needs epic oriental-themed fight music!
3. Wario Land: Shake it! , Mount Bighill
One of my favourite levels in Wario Land: Shake it! I just love the percussion that goes along with the melody. It becomes more intense as it progresses. Don’t you feel some kind of sadness and melancholy, yet related to strength and joy?
4. Mario Party 7, Pagoda Peak
I just love this board. This kind of music just makes you cheerful and gives you the resolve to climb up that mountain.
5. Super Paper Mario, Sammer’s Kingdom
Yet an another great oriental-themed song. You must feel the harmony, the peace, the calmness of the music.
6.Super Paper Mario, Sammer’s Kingdom battle theme
This music plays while you are facing and fighting the 100 sammer guys. You never get bored when listening to it, yet you are glad when you have finished the trail.
I hope you enjoyed this article. (:
Photoshopped Image of the Month (Edofenrir)
Hey there, everyone. This is Edofenrir, and I will be supplying May’s Photoshopped Image of the Month. Although I have to admit, the title is somewhat of a misnomer; I don’t own Photoshop, so I used The GIMP instead, which works out just as well.
Pictured above is Goombella, a major character from my favorite Mario game ever, Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door. She is one of my favorite characters from that game and the proof that Goombas do not always have to be pushovers. Respect the Goombas, or else… well, Goombella’s Tattle Log knows where you live…
I used normal Goomba artwork from New Super Mario Bros. as the base for my image. Then I recolored some parts, and added some things from other images as well to compose a Goombella. The final image is composed of a Goomba, and parts of Mario, Spooky Speedster, FLUDD, Princess Peach, and Princess Daisy. All in all it ended up being a pretty crazy mixture.
And I guess that is all I have to offer. Thank you for the attention.
Random Image of the Month (Ralphfan)
Welcome to Issue L’s Random Image of the Month! This is a screenshot of Daisy from the Nintendo 64 game Mario Tennis. Daisy was one of the five Technique style characters. Waluigi, one of the other Technique players, made his first appearance in the game.
Well, that was kinda underwhelming. I was hoping I’d come up with a better image but that’s what I got. I guess all that’s left to say is that the first 50 issues have been great, and I’m sure the next 50 will as well! Keep on ’Shroomin’! (Oh, cool. That word started and ended with apostrophes.)
Pipe Plaza
Director’s Notes (Marioguy1 (talk))Hey guys! Welcome to Issue L’s Pipe Plaza! This month is a great one for The ’Shroom, with the Spotlights, the Section of the Month and the feedback survey; lots of new stuff going around! More related to the Pipe Plaza, a new section – Anniversary Announcements (written by Ralphfan) – has been created, make sure to read it to stay up to date on the MarioWiki’s Sixth Anniversary! Now please take time to enjoy this picture! Anyways, we still have a few spots open in the Pipe Plaza so make sure to sign up: as always, my Pipe Plaza description page is still up – it has many interesting facts about the Pipe Plaza that you may not know. Aside from that, have a great Issue L! Mario Calendar (WigglerWhoopin'Warrior135 (talk))
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