The 'Shroom:Issue 219/Pipe Plaza

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Director's Notes

Written by: Zange (talk)

Shroom2025 Villains Zange.png

Hello to all our wonderful readers, and welcome to EVIL Pipe Plaza, as part of our EVIL 'Shroom takeover issue! Mwahahaha~ I hope you all have been enjoying the EVIL sections and specials so far.

I'm nearly done with my contract for my carpenter / set building job at the theatre festival I mentioned last month and I'm really sad because I don't want it to be over. Going off of some of the horror stories I heard about last year, this year seems to have gone MUCH better all things considered which makes me happy. I may return next year if timing allows it, because I've had a lot of fun with this job ^^

We have two EVIL special sections this month in the form of LEGO Look (courtesy of Waluigi Time (talk)) and The History of Cozy Glow (courtesy of Sparks (talk))! We also have the rest of the super cool and very EVIL Pipe Plaza sections you know and love! Don't forget that you, too can write a Pipe Plaza section about nearly anything you want and send it in! Just head over to the sign up page to learn more!

That's all for EVIL Director's Notes, enjoy the rest of the month~ (EVIL or otherwise hehe)

Section of the Month

Congratulations to this month's winners! In first place, we have Yoshi18 (talk) with Yoshi18 Previews! Taking second place, we have OH BABY A TRIPLE: Shoey (talk) with What's in a Campaign?, Waluigi Time (talk) with The 'Shroom Report, and Hooded Pitohui (talk) with Poll Committee Discussion are all sharing silver this time! Thank you to everyone who votes for their favorite sections as well.

PIPE PLAZA SECTION OF THE MONTH
Place Section Votes % Writer
1st Yoshi18 Previews 7 41.18% Yoshi18 (talk)
2nd What's in a Campaign? 3 17.65% Shoey (talk)
2nd The 'Shroom Report 3 17.65% Waluigi Time (talk)
2nd Poll Committee Discussion 3 17.65% Hooded Pitohui (talk)
News and information
Mario Calendar
GPM1000 (talk)
Find out all about this month's Super Mario releases.
read more
To-Do Tracker
Camwoodstock (talk)
No clue what to do? Join the fun and see what's been done!
read more
Poll Committee Discussion
MightyMario (talk)
The best analysis of the polls around!
read more
Anniversary Announcements
Lakituthequick (talk)
The ongoings of the Mario Awards.
read more
The 'Shroom Report
Waluigi Time (talk)
All the latest writers and all the milestones of the current ones.
read more
A Section of Muppetational Origins
Zange (talk)
GO NOW AND LEAVE MEEEEEE
read more
What's in a Campaign?
Shoey (talk)
50 robots calls for Sumpthing special to celebrate!
read more
The History of Cozy Glow
Sparks (talk)
Cozy Glow? Maybe not so...
read more
LEGO Look
Waluigi Time (talk)
I find your lack of bricks disturbing.
read more

Mario Calendar

Written by: GPM1000 (talk)

Happy Pride Month, everyone!! I hope you are all doing great, and that everyone has had a fantastic start to their summers. And, big news… the Switch 2 came out!! Mario Kart World is here and, while I haven't gotten a chance to play it yet, I am extremely envious of everyone who has, and can't wait to get my hands on one. But alas… it's Mario Calendar time! Let's get into it!

Region Abbreviations

Abb. Region
ALL All Regions (JP/NA/EU/AU)
JP Japan
NA North America
EU Europe
AU Oceania/Australia
SK South Korea
CHN China
UK United Kingdom

Console Abbreviations

Abb. Console
NES Nintendo Entertainment System
Famicom Family Computer Disk System
SNES Super Nintendo Entertainment System
N64 Nintendo 64
GC Nintendo GameCube
GB Game Boy
GBC Game Boy Color
GBA Game Boy Advance
DS Nintendo DS
3DS Nintendo 3DS
Switch Nintendo Switch
Wii VC Nintendo Wii Virtual Console
3DS VC Nintendo 3DS Virtual Console
Wii U VC Nintendo Wii U Virtual Console
VB Virtual Boy
G&W Game and Watch
64DD Nintendo 64 Disk Drive
MS-DOS Microsoft Disk Operating System
CD-i Philips CD-i
IQ iQue Player
NVS Nvidia Shield
ACPC Amstrad CPC
ZX ZX Spectrum
Coleco Colecovision
TI-99 Texas Instruments TI-99/4A

And that's it for June! There are a few big highlights I could mention, including the original release of Super Mario 64 for the Nintendo 64 in Japan, but there's obviously one that is more important than anything else right now. The Nintendo Switch 2! The last time we had a Nintendo console release in June was with the release of the Nintendo DS Lite, and Nintendo has come a loooong way since then.

So what do you guys think? Is everyone enjoying the new console and the new Mario Kart game? I seriously can't wait to buy one, it's all anyone is talking about online. But yeah, that's really all the analysis I have for this month - the Switch 2 is out! It looks good! So I hope you enjoyed the Mario Calendar, and I'll see you next month :)

To-Do Tracker

Written by: Cam / Tori / Cecil / Claire / Macy (talk)

(You read the Pipe Plaza section, not expecting anyone to have followed the villainy theme...)

(It generally is a bit more high-brow than other sections of the newsletter.)

(Suddenly, you hear a printer in the distance, whirring and scratching about.)

(...)

(The paper jammed.)

(You meticulously free the sheet of paper.)

(Printed on it, is...)

(A single, really small image of a Pikmin enemy.)

Shroom 219 TDTracker Breadbug.png

(You smile, feeling as though you have not just seen an obligation satisfied, but have witnessed a devilish little critter grace your monitor.)

Hello, there! How are you holding up in this post-Deltarune Chapter 3 + 4, post-Switch 2 Launch world? It's... A lot! Over here! That funny white dog has had his whims with us! And to think that as this article releases, we're just starting the yearly Mario Awards season. 20 whole years of this wiki... How time flies, right? It feels like not too long ago, we were in elementary school, sneakily looking at random pages on the wiki just for fun. This website's grown up with us. That feels really weird, right?

...But, no matter what, through rain, snow, new console, villains, awards, sentimentality, or Dog, we will--nay, we must--make sure the to-do bar is properly accounted for. So, enough with a long-winded opening. Let's get right into it, shall we?

Note: All dates here were taken fairly late at night in EST; around 1-3 AM EST.

May & June To-Do Items
To-Do Item May 14, 2025 May 21, 2025 May 28, 2025 Jun 4, 2025 Jun 11, 2025 Jun 18, 2025
Spotlight focuses 2 5 5 5 4 4
Ongoing TPPs 19 24 29 30 27 20
Unimplemented Proposals 30+ 30+ 30+ 30+ 30+ 30+
Unresolved Discussions 252 258 256 250 258 260
Construction Projects 105 103 104 97 103 105
Rewrites Needed 120 121 126 127 130 131
Sourcing Issues 19,991 19,948 19,934 19,926 19,971 19,933
Stub Articles 656 657 661 664 670 674
Wanted Articles 1000+ 1000+ 1000+ 1000+ 1000+ 1000+
Requested Deletions 3 2 N/A N/A N/A N/A
Suggested Moves 56 55 53 56 60 63
Suggested Merges 76 70 63 64 67 66
Suggested Splits 36 36 39 41 43 44
Deprecated Parameters 2,418 2,170 1,106 N/A N/A N/A
Missing Parameters 993 N/A N/A N/A N/A N/A
Disambigs Needed N/A 1 N/A 1 N/A N/A
Duplicate Arguments N/A 1 N/A N/A N/A N/A
Note Trims N/A 1 N/A N/A N/A N/A
Reference Errors N/A N/A 1 N/A N/A 1
Unknown Meanings 237 13 13 10 5 N/A
Image Quality 3,925 3,923 3,938 3,951 3,951 3,953
Images Needed 725 723 728 716 720 724
Media Needed 217 218 219 232 255 289
Media Quality 6 6 6 6 6 5
Unused Files 200+ 200+ 200+ 100+ 100+ 100+
Files To Be Used N/A N/A N/A 77 77 73

For some observations for how the numbers have progressed, and some potential targets:

  • First of all, welcome a new category to the bar; Files to be used! This split was first enacted in the afternoon of May 31st, 2025, with 60 entries to its name. Unlike the unused files, these are for files that are expressly planned to be used by an editor in the future. Obviously, if you add onto these, make sure to take care of them accordingly, okay?
  • Ongoing TPPs have had wild fluctuations, and it's been a busy month for them. Despite this, unimplemented proposals has held steady at 30+ entries; some of those have been waiting years to be implemented, and could use your help!
  • Construction Projects, despite dipping early, ultimately rose back up to a net neutral. Rewrites, meanwhile, have only grown...
  • Out of everyone's favorite trio (citation needed), moves/merges/splits. the only clear winner is merges, who managed to lose 10 entries! ...Moves and splits, however, have only grown.
  • Sourcing Issues has managed to hold onto its steady decrease throughout the month; the only obvious spike being shortly after the Switch 2 released, which was quickly dealt with. Nice!
  • Deprecated parameters is clearly the big victory of the month, having gone from 2,418 entries to being completely empty by June 4th, 2025! Well done!
  • Also joining the victories of the month is Unknown Meanings, which was just barely able to eke its way from 13 on May 21st, to 0 by the cutoff date. (If you're wondering why we're ignoring that extreme start for Unknown Meanings, it's because it actually ties in with that week's missing parameters.
  • With increased music coverage per recent proposals, it's no surprise that Wanted Media has gone on the rise; just under a 50% increase from last month. Break out the old records and CDs!
  • Against all odds, despite how inactive the category was, Media Quality got another one of its entries taken care of at the eleventh hour. If you've played Donkey Kong 64, own either The Super Mario Bros. Super Show! or The Super Mario Bros. Movie in good quality, or know how to fix audio desync in a video, this category has your name on it!

Poll Committee Discussion

Written by: MightyMario (talk)

Hello, Shroom readers! It's me, the mightiest Mario around, MightyMario, here with some fresh analysis of the latest Mario Wiki polls! As the Nintendo Switch 2 has released this month, I hope everyone's been having fun with Mario Kart World, and looking forward to Donkey Kong Bananza next month as well! Let's switch gears and see what polls Paper Plumm and her Poll Committee have crafted this month!

Archives

2D Mario platformers have featured varying art directions and styles over the years. Which one has your favourite aesthetics? (Waluigi Time (talk), May 11th, 2025)

2D Mario platformers have featured varying art directions and styles over the years. Which one has your favourite aesthetics?

Super Mario Bros. Wonder 50.25% (1,319 votes)
Super Mario World 15.47% (406 votes)
New Super Mario Bros. Series 12.95% (340 votes)
Super Mario All-Stars/Super Mario Advance series 7.28% (191 votes)
Super Mario Bros. 2/Super Mario Bros. 3/Super Mario Land 2: Six Golden Coins 5.33% (140 votes)
I have no opinion. 4.61% (121 votes)
Super Mario Bros./Super Mario Land 2.59% (68 votes)
I do not like any of these art styles or would prefer another art style not on this list. 1.52% (40 votes)
Total votes: 2,625

Of the Mario games set to release for the Nintendo Switch 2, which one are you most excited for? (Paper Plumm (talk), May 25th, 2025)

Of the Mario games set to release for the Nintendo Switch 2, which one are you most excited for?

Mario Kart World 65.73% (2,461 votes)
Donkey Kong Bananza 18.14% (679 votes)
I am not looking forward to any of the titles listed above. 5.72% (214 votes)
Mario games on Nintendo GameCube - Nintendo Classics 4.54% (170 votes)
I have no opinion on this. 3.55% (133 votes)
Super Mario Party Jamboree: Nintendo Switch 2 Edition + Jamboree TV 2.32% (87 votes)
Total votes: 3,744

Analysis

2D Mario platformers have featured varying art directions and styles over the years. Which one has your favourite aesthetics?

Mario and the Gang celebrating Flower Kingdom saved
"This is wonderful, Mario! Oh, let's live in this universe."
"Gosh, it's pretty intoxicating, isn't it?"

Super Mario Bros. Wonder certainly has marked a turning point for the Mario series, introducing vibrant colors and backgrounds, more expressive character designs, and an endless slew of Talking Flowers that always want to talk your ear off. It's no surprise that this was the top choice in regards to which artstyle people preferred. I can certainly see why, I loved the artstyle myself! I'm so happy to see it return for Mario Kart World (it especially goes well with Donkey Kong's new design).

In terms of other artstyles, Super Mario World took the second spot, with the New Super Mario Bros. artstyle (the one the series had been using for quite some time) in third place. The All Stars/Advance artstyle, in all of its 16-bit/32-bit glory, placed fourth, the non-Super Mario Bros. 8-bit styles seemed to fall in the middle of the votes in fifth place, and the classic Super Mario Bros./Super Mario Land style took the last spot in the poll.

Of the Mario games set to release for the Nintendo Switch 2, which one are you most excited for?

Conkdor in Mario Kart World
They're letting anybody on the roster these days.

To absolutely no surprise at all, Mario Kart World takes the gold trophy in terms of how much people are excited for it, and by a country mile, too! Considering it's the only new first-party Nintendo game released on the Switch 2 (besides the Welcome Tour) as of writing, the game will have several weeks to take the victory lap for players before Donkey Kong Bananza smashes onto the system next month. Of course, if you're more of a classic game lover, the Nintendo GameCube - Nintendo Classics app was also released… with no Mario games at launch, but they're coming! And finally, the Super Mario Party Jamboree: Nintendo Switch 2 Edition + Jamboree TV game (that is a enormous mouthful holy heck) seems to be the least anticipated for and with that novel-length title, I don't blame 'em.

Conclusion

That'll do it for this month's Poll Committee Discussion: The Shroom Edition + Super Mario Wiki TV! Next month, everyone's favorite pony fan and Wiki Administrator, Sparks, will take on the next set of polls!

See you next time, reader!

Anniversary Announcements

Written by: Lakituthequick (talk)

“We voted Mario Party-e as the most forgettable game last year, and now we are worried too many people will remember it?”
—MCD (talk · Boards)

Good day villainous readers of The 'Shroom, it is fiendishly time for a new release of Anniversary Announcements! Evil! ...I got nothing else, let's get into it.

The polls have opened!

The most important thing to mention is, of course, the opening of the polls! Vote now!' Or, if you want to vote on the polls in a random order, just visit the wiki's main page and find the polls there. Note that you can vote in each of the polls once a week; if you already voted, you can vote again seven days after that.

But that is just the Mario and Fail awards! To vote in the Community awards, visit the dossier elsewhere in this edition of The 'Shroom. Note that you can select up to four nominees to vote on for each poll.

All poll categories close a week after this publication, on 28 June.

Tournaments

In this section of AA, I shall update you on all things tournaments, including new ones and progress in ongoing ones.

Last month we only had one tournament's finish to report; there are no other tournaments active at the time of writing.

The events and games thread can be used to discuss and gauge interest for future activities.

The awards

The following lists all discussed awards and notable changes and reasoning. Check out the full list for a complete overview of all additions and removals, and also check out the meeting logs and summaries for a more detailed insight in the changes.

New awards

These awards are brand new, or sometimes return from two or more years ago.

Favorite Non-game Media (new)
An award to highlight publications of Mario media that are not games.
Worst Title (new)
An award to spotlight games and media with cumbersome or non-descriptive names, among others.
Worst Game Aesthetic (new)
An award about games with bad visual design and presentation.

Updated awards

Awards that existed last year and have been updated based on recent releases or with high-ranking write-in votes from last year.

M9. Favorite Super Mario Bros. Wonder Level
Previously undecided, this award was ultimately kept and updated with high-ranking write-ins from last year.

Additionally, the following awards were amended shortly after the release of Mario Kart World to include materials from that game: Favorite Musical Track, Favorite Soundtrack, Favorite Game Mechanic, Favorite Mario Kart Item, Favorite Mario Kart Course, Worst Game Mechanic, and Worst Mario Kart Course Remake.

The bins

The blue bin contains awards that may have potential left, but will only be considered to be kept to fill up necessary awards spots. The red bin contains awards that have been removed entirely.

Favorite 3D Platformer (removed)
Previously undecided, this award was ultimately removed due to a lack of new 3D platformers. Note that more information about Donkey Kong Bananza was not yet available at the time of decision, and that the game has not been released yet. This makes it likely that this award will return next year with said game.

And that covers this evil edition of AA. Don't forget to vote, and be sure to check back next time. Adios!

The 'Shroom Report

Written by: Waluigi Time (talk)

Ah, 'Shroom readers, what an unexpected surprise. And by unexpected I mean COMPLETELY expected! Behold, my 'SHROOM REPORTINATOR! With this, I will compile the statistics for Issue 218 from Meta Knight's spreadsheets and finally take over the TRI-STATE AREA!

Oh no new readers or anyone needing a refresher, don't open that box below!

​
  • First-Time Writers lists everyone who wrote their first section for The 'Shroom in the previous issue.
  • New Sections lists recurring sections that started their run in the previous issue. This includes returning sections that previously went inactive.
  • Guest Sections lists one-off submissions from the previous issue.
  • Milestones covers certain section numbers reached in the previous issue. Writers are mentioned for every 10 sections written in a team and every 50 sections written overall, teams are mentioned for every 100 sections, and The 'Shroom itself is mentioned for every 500 sections.
  • Most Sections Written lists the current all-time record holders.
First-Time Writers
Writer Section
Golddude64 (talk) The Ghostly Dossier
New Sections
Section Writer
Game Corner Aomaf (talk)
The Ghostly Dossier Golddude64 (talk)
Rhythm Review Zange (talk)
Guest Sections
Section Writer
Shop Scout ClawgripFan9001
Quiz Waluigi Time (talk)
Passion of the WAH! ClawgripFan9001
Yoshi18 Previews Yoshi18 (talk)
A Golden Sun Review Finale Paper Plumm (talk)
Video Game Review Waluigi Time (talk)
Milestones
Writer Milestone
BBQ Turtle (talk) 90 Fun Stuff sections
DryBonesBandit (talk) 10 Fake News sections
Hooded Pitohui (talk) 150 Strategy Wing sections
Paper Plumm (talk) 10 Critic Corner sections
Shoey (talk) 90 Fake News sections
Waluigi Time (talk) 160 Fake News sections
Most Sections Written
Team Writer Number of Sections
Main/Staff Henry Tucayo Clay (talk) 142
Fake News Waluigi Time (talk) 160
Fun Stuff Shoey (talk) 157
Palette Swap FunkyK38 (talk) 208
Pipe Plaza Yoshi876 (talk) 128
Critic Corner Hypnotoad (talk) 208
Strategy Wing Hooded Pitohui (talk) 150
Overall Yoshi876 (talk) 747
'Shroom Trivia
The first villain ever mentioned in The 'Shroom was Bowser, in a section from the first issue titled From the Mushroom Vaults which provided game tips. The first villains to appear in each team are Wario (in Fake News' Poll of the Month), Shrooboid Brat (in Fun Stuff's Quiz), Bowser (in Palette Swap's Box-Art of the Month and Critic Corner's Marioverse Reviews), Fawful (in Pipe Plaza's Featured), and Donkey Kong (in Strategy Wing's From the Mushroom Vaults), each one in the team's debut.

A Section of Muppetational Origins

Written by: Zange (talk)

(once again I would like to thank the Muppet Wiki for being a valuable resource of information and images!)

Hello and welcome back to a new edition of A Section of Muppetational Origins! This is Zange, and I am here to tell you all about the origins and history of another wonderful Muppet. However, before we get into it I’d like to touch on something real quick. Last time, we covered everyone’s favorite cookie devouring Muppet, Cookie Monster. In that section, I mentioned that the earliest version of the Cookie Monster puppet was used for a sketch filmed for an IBM training tape. This sketch and many others used for IBM training tapes were developed in part by David Lazer, an IBM executive who would later go on to hold producer titles for many Muppet productions, including executive producer of The Muppet Show. The reason I bring this up is that it was announced last month that Lazer had unfortunately passed away in April of this year. Rest in peace to the man who was an integral part in making The Muppet Show a success and a great experience for all the guest stars.

In honor of this issue being themed around villains, I’ve decided to cover the Phantom of the Muppet Show this time. That’s right, we’re talking about resident spooky thespian turned fashion expert, Uncle Deadly!

Gargoyle Muppet… Color me intrigued…

As with many of the Muppets created for The Muppet Show, Uncle Deadly was designed by Michael Frith, who began his involvement with Jim Henson’s works during his time at Random House. When Random House was beginning to publish Sesame Street books, Frith was named the editor and art director for those books. Frith would later go on to design Muppets for several of Henson’s productions. As far as I’m aware, there are no dates anywhere indicating when the sketches designing Uncle Deadly were drawn. However, we do know there were at least two revisions, the first of which shows Deadly looking more like a gargoyle. It is interesting to think about what that would look like in execution, and if his appearance would have been changed at all after the original puppet was built. The second sketch more closely resembles Deadly’s current design.

If we are going strictly by production order, Uncle Deadly’s first appearance is in the Vincent Price episode of The Muppet Show, or episode 119 if using the production codes. Deadly appears as Price’s ‘beautiful assistant’ during a sketch where Fozzie Bear and Gonzo come to a haunted house in search of lodging. However, due to the WONDERS of television syndication, which was the distribution method used for The Muppet Show, this particular episode was the last one to premiere out of the entire first season. Deadly does receive a proper introduction in the Twiggy episode (episode 121, and yes this episode DID originally premiere before 119), in which he terrorizes the show crew under the guise of ‘The Phantom of the Muppet Show’. It is also here that we learn Deadly used to be a performer in his own right - that is, until opening night of Othello where he played the titular role and was killed by the critics. (His words, not mine…)

You’re a CREEPY COOKIE, Deadly!!

In all of his appearances in The Muppet Show, Uncle Deadly was performed by Jerry Nelson, the voice for which Nelson has stated is an impression / tribute to John Carradine, an actor well known for his hammy performances in horror films.

After the first season of The Muppet Show, Uncle Deadly would go on to make a few more appearances throughout the series, primarily singing songs and making appearances as the villain in the Muppet Melodrama segments from the third season. However, partway through production of season 3, Deadly seemingly vanished from the cast of Muppet performers. He did make a handful of non-speaking cameos in movies and specials after this point, and even appeared in some promo images for the PlayStation game Muppet Monster Adventure, but disappeared from projects altogether in the early 2000s.

There were plans for Uncle Deadly to have his own series at one point in the early 2000’s, titled Uncle Deadly’s House of Badness. This was meant to be a silly horror-type of show, along the lines of Goosebumps. However, the series never made it out of development.

To the shock of many, Uncle Deadly made a return in 2011’s The Muppets, in which he played assistant to Tex Richman, an oil salesman trying to demolish the old Muppet Theatre to drill for oil. In a dramatic scene near the end of the film, Deadly stops the second of Richman’s attempts to sabotage our Muppet performers, proudly proclaiming that he is a Muppet in his heart, before pushing Richman off the signal tower they were climbing. For this appearance, they rebuilt Deadly’s puppet, and cast Matt Vogel as his new performer, since Jerry Nelson was retired from performing for a number of years by this point.

From this point on, Uncle Deadly would continue to hold prominence in various other Muppet media. In the 2015 television series The Muppets (not a confusing name at all, nope…), Deadly was the wardrobe supervisor to Miss Piggy for her late night show - Up Late with Miss Piggy. He would continue to carry qualities of this in future Muppet media - namely the fashion sense and close friendship with Miss Piggy. Additionally, Deadly was the host of the Muppet Thought of the Week videos from 2017-2018, and has one particularly notable running gag of frustration in a week where the videos were posted every single day (though this posting schedule only happened in order to get caught up on missed videos). It will be interesting to see if this version of Uncle Deadly continues to stay similar to how he is now in, say, 10 or more years. Until next time, keep believing and keep pretending!

What's in a Campaign?

Written by: Shoey (talk)

Hello, and welcome to a very special What's in a Campaign! Why is it special, you might ask??? Because this is my 50th What's in a Campaign? and my 50th straight What's in a Campaign?! That's right, fifty straight months of metal-crunching, robot-cutting, bot-flipping action! So I knew I needed to do something special for the 50th What's in a Campaign?, so I decided it was time to cover a truly special robot, a long-standing competitor and a robot truly near and dear to my heart. This month we will be covering the entire career of the low-tech warrior Sumpthing!

It sure is Sumpthing…

Originally appearing in Series 3, Sumpthing was built by Richard "Mr. Dig" Dignall, Geoff Germaney, and John Lort, with Paul Bacon joining the team for Series 6 and Extreme 1. Team captain Mr. Dig (who was notable for constantly appearing, how you say, stoned out of his mind), built Sumpthing as a low-tech warrior built to fight against the high-tech computer age! Which… wait a minute, Series 3??? High-tech???? None of those words go together! Apparently, it took two years to build the bot and the team originally started building it during Series 1… HIGH-TECH??? SERIES 1??? THE SERIES WITH THE BLOB IN IT??? WHAT ARE WE DOING, MR. DIG???

Made from 100% recycled scrap, Sumpthing featured as a weapon a mounted pickaxe that was connected to the drive system. This meant that, every time they went forward, the weapon would fire… for some reason. Surprisingly fast at 20mph, Sumpthing was powered by four 800 car starter motors from Minis, with two of them being used to go forward and the other two being used to go backwards. Aw snap, guys, turns out it also has a forklift lifter on the bottom of its front! It's Series 3! OF COURSE it has a secondary weapon that will never work! Sumpthing was, as its mission statement suggests, a hunk of junk, but let's see how it does in the warzone!

As a reminder, all pictures are sourced from the fantastic Robot Wars Wiki. If you'd like to watch any of these fights, check out the videos. We've got one video for all the main series fights and the side series fights are in their own videos. Timestamps are provided in the section.

Despite apparently somehow having technical problems, Sumpthing successfully managed to qualify for Series 3. It probably made the cut because it was fast and Series 3 qualification was primarily through the gauntlet. Placed in Heat B against the hydraulic jaws of Pitbull, in the back the Pitbull team were apparently worried about Sumpthing, fearing that their jaws wouldn't be able to damage the armor on Sumpthing while the fearsome pickaxe could easily go through Pitbull's armor.

Pitbull pushes a dead Sumpthing.

But, uh, I've got a feeling their worries will prove to be displaced. The fight starts (1:38) starts with the faster Sumpthing charging in, launching a mighty pickaxe attack, and… oop, it's broken! Yep! Sumpthing charges, in launches an attack, misses, and breaks itself. The whole fight lasts about, I don't know, four seconds! Well… huh… It can only go up from here?

Sumpthing would return in Series 4, having successfully qualified by beating Banshee in a fight. Which, woof, I would not want to see that fight. For those of you that don't know, Banshee was a full-body spinner whose body spun slower than my buddy's two year old spinning in circles, so yeah, rough stuff. Placed in Heat K, probably the weakest heat in Series 4, Sumpthing's first opponent is the 28-seeded Weld-Dor 2, who was given the 28th seed with a stunning record of two and two, with wins over Robot Wars juggernauts The Iron Mask and Prometheus. In other words, a seed that again confirms you don't need 32 seeds in a competition with 96 robots in it! That's too many seeds, guys! The other opponent is Little Fly, a robot featuring a tiny spinning lawnmower blade which I'm sure is really gonna take it to 'em, boys.

Little Fly slices through Weld-Dor 2!

The fight (5:30) starts tentatively, with the three robots just kind of driving around. Finally, Little Fly goes in for an attack and actually seems to get its blade stuck in Weld-Dor 2? At the very least, it's on Weld-Dor 2! Sumpthing charges in on Little Fly and manages to land an attack without breaking itself, so, hey, progress! Sumpthing actually starts raining blows on Little Fly, including a pretty solid blow directly on Little Fly's spinner, which I thought was cool personally. Weld-Dor 2 charges in on Little Fly, but I don't think its lifter/flipper is working because it gets under them but does nothing. All three then do a meeting of the minds in the middle of the arena. AKA, they smash into each other. Little Fly gets its blade stuck in Weld-Dor 2 and drags it over the flame pit as Sumpthing, sensing weakness in something that's not itself, drives in and launches a successful pickaxe strike on Weld-Dor 2.

For a second, it looks like Little Fly just randomly died and Weld-Dor 2 comes in for an attack? I don't know; none of Weld-Dor 2's weapons seem to be working. Either way, that's when Sumpthing comes in from the bottom for an attack on the back of Weld-Dor 2! There's a lot of smashing around and I'm like, "man, this fight is long". Little Fly isn't really doing anything. I don't think they're dead, but they might be wedged on something or they could just be slow. They only have a top speed of 4mph. Sumpthing gets to the front of Weld-Dor 2, whose weapon system must be totally busted because they don't do anything, and Sumpthing rains blow after blow after blow onto Weld-Dor 2!

BLOW AFTER BLOW AFTER BLOW!

Sumpthing begins pushing Weld-Dor 2 around and, oh my god, Weld-Dor 2 has completely stopped moving! Has Sumpthing immobilized Weld-Dor 2??? Yes, they have! Weld-Dor 2 is counted out and, pack your bags, baby, because Sumpthing is going to round two! Oh, but wait… Despite the excitement making it look like it was Sumpthing that killed Weld-Dor 2, it was actually the blade of Little Fly that did the damage. Which, wow, imagine getting KO'd by a lawnmower blade in Series 4 of all places. Robot Wars was a mistake, guys!

In its startling second-round debut, Sumpthing faces off against the unique MouseTrap. The fight (10:10) starts with MouseTrap charging in at Sumpthing, with Sumpthing responding by spinning away. Sumpthing then charges in and ramps off MouseTrap's wedge. And you know what? I always think it's cool when that happens in robot combat! Sumpthing rams into the side of MouseTrap, landing a solid pickaxe hit before backing up and charging at them again, this time just ramming them as MouseTrap flees. Sumpthing pursues, getting to the front of MouseTrap. Sumpthing attempts to hit it with its pickaxe and misses because the front wedge of MouseTrap is too low, but before Sumpthing can recoil its pickaxe, MouseTrap drops the trap and catches the Sumpthing pickaxe in place! Man guys, MouseTrap's such a cool robot and this is such an awesome visual!

Man, robot combat is so cool, guys.

MouseTrap then lets go of Sumpthing's pickaxe and rams them forward, sending Sumpthing into a side spike! But Sumpthing gets away and just charges full-speed right into the wooden side of MouseTrap, sending splinters flying! The two robots begin trying to size each other up, with MouseTrap trying to use its wedge to get under Sumpthing, but the speedy Sumpthing gets away at the last second and sends MouseTrap into the waiting claws of Dead Metal.

MouseTrap gets away before Dead Metal can do anything (guess the claws weren't that waiting…) when Sumpthing charges in. But Sumpthing goes up the wedge of MouseTrap and MouseTrap launches the bladed axe into Sumpthing! Sumpthing gets away as MouseTrap pursues. MouseTraps charges at Sumpthing, but Sumpthing gets away. Sumpthing gets to the side of MouseTrap and down goes the Sumpthing pickaxe! MouseTrap seems to have stopped, but Sumpthing isn't letting up! It bears down with a charge followed by a pickaxe shot followed by a charge again followed by a pickaxe shot.

Sumpthing takes it to MouseTrap.

Sumpthing is pouring on hits in its quest to reach the Heat Final. After what seems like half a dozen blows, Sumpthing backs off the apparently-dead MouseTrap, but suddenly MouseTrap comes back to life, jerking forward in the arena. Seeing that the fight is back on, Sumpthing goes back on the attack, launching a powerful shove to the backside of the barely-moving MouseTrap. But there's still a little life in MouseTrap, so Sumpthing attempts to keep up the attack, charging in from a mighty distance for another attack. But they miss, and not only do they miss, but Sumpthing's pickaxe hits the arena floor. The force of the axe causes something in Sumpthing to snap. The body of Sumpthing is on the arena floor and the tires are just barely -and I mean just barley - in the air. Sumpthing can't move.

Man…

Sumpthing is counted out, and just like that, a sure victory turns into a sudden defeat. Robot Wars is a cruel mistress sometimes. This is a devastating fight to me. Not only is MouseTrap on death's doorstep at this point, but Sumpthing was winning this fight even if it went to the judges. And because the heat final would have been Sumpthing vs Little Fly and Little Fly sucks, I truly believe that Sumpthing would have beaten Little Fly and made the Series Semi-Final… where it would have been promptly mashed to paste by Stinger, but that's not the point of the matter.

Sumpthing would have been, at the very least, a Heat Finalist, and more than likely a Semi-Finalist. Who knows how history would have changed had Sumpthing made the Semi-Final here. They probably would have been given a seed in Series 5 and, you know, personally I like to think if Sumpthing would have made the Series Semi-Final here, the financial crisis of 2008 never happens. But sadly guys, we don't live in that timeline. Also, before we move on, Sumpthing was nominated for the "Most Original Entry Award", which… why? Sumpthing was in Series 3 with basically the same design. How can you get nominated for the "Most Original Entry Award" in your second series? It just don't make no sense!

Riding that momentum from their Series 4 performance, Sumpthing would make some changes for Series 5! That stupid pickaxe gone! Instead, it has been replaced by a swinging arm with circular saws attached to it. The arm can be modified for either a double or single blade system. Boys, I don't wanna be the bearer of bad news, but I've seen this concept used by a couple of robots, and it usually doesn't work out well! With their newfound respectability, Sumpthing was placed into Heat K, where they faced off with Widow's Revenge… Aww, man, how can the producers disrespect Sumpthing like this!?

You're probably wondering what I mean. The reason this is disrespectful is because Widow's Revenge is a piece of shit with a stupid gimmick! Widow's Revenge is built up as a robot built by the upset girlfriends of the Razer team, angry that Razer's team has been wasting their time on nerd shit like robots instead of cool shit like, uh, plowing women, I guess? But in reality, of the three roboteers that built this shitty Series 3-quality robot, only one of them had anything to do with Razer - that being Gillie Blood, the fiancé of Ian Lewis. The other two builders had nothing to do with Razer's team at all. Now, the producers desperately wanted Widow's Revenge to fight Razer because I guess they hate the idea of good television. But they didn't want to make it too obvious, so they picked Widow's Revenge to fight a robot they were sure it could beat, and unfortunately the robot they picked was Sumpthing! But you know what? Sumpthing is going to give it their all and hopefully prove these producers wrong!!!

The fight (14:57) starts with Sumpthing going straight at Widow's Revenge, "cutting" them with their circular saw arm. Sumpthing kind of parks in place and drops the circular saw arm on top of Widow's Revenge, which does, how you say, nothing! Widow's Revenge then hits the blade arm of Sumpthing with their rear-mounted spinning drum, which also does nothing. Then Sumpthing hits Widow's Revenge in the side with their saw arm which also does nothing again! The two robots meet in the middle, with Sumpthing bouncing off of Widow's Revenge before dropping the arm two more times uselessly on the top of Widow's Revenge. Both robots are getting a lot of attacks in, but none of them mean a goddamn thing! The two robots bump into each other as Sumpthing presses the pit release button. This fight must have been just awful, because the countdown clock is already going. Sumpthing is barely working and the fight goes to the judges. The judges rule in favor of Widow's Revenge on… maybe damage, I guess. I don't know. The fight sucked and poor Sumpthing proved the producers were wise in placing their trust in its failure.

After that atrocity, we move onto Extreme 1, where Sumpthing competed in a few different events. In the first event, Sumpthing would compete in a Mayhem (an Annihilator Qualifier) against Pussycat and SMIDSY (technically S.M.I.D.S.Y. but c'mon, lol), and I'm not even going to pretend like there's a chance Sumpthing is winning this fight, lol. The fight (second video) starts with our boy Sumpthing doing nothing as Pussycat and SMIDSY bash into each other. After about 10-15 seconds, Sumpthing decides to join the fray - big mistake!

Annnnnnnnnnd there goes your weapon

One strike from the custom-designed circular saw of Pussycat (the only circular saw that ever really worked in Robot Wars), and the wires to Sumpthing's saw are severed, rendering Sumpthing weaponless. While this is happening, SMIDSY pushes the pit release button and then nearly drives in. Then Sumpthing nearly drives in! Pussycat and SMIDSY battle it out as Sumpthing drives around. Sumpthing decides to go down swinging, attempting to attack both SMIDSY and Pussycat with its weaponless arm. Then, for some reason (probably because it's Extreme 1 the House Robots are just in the middle of the arena), SGT. Bash starts attacking Sumpthing because god forbid we just have robot combat! Sumpthing's spikes get caught on SGT. Bash for a little bit, but Sumpthing manages to free itself.

As this all happens, offscreen Pussycat disables, I assume, half of SMIDSY's drive, because they're spinning in circles. Sumpthing attempts to fight Pussycat which, hey, give 'em credit for the tenacity. It doesn't do anything because they just have an arm, but, still, they're fighting! Sumpthing manages to get one of their static spikes stuck into Pussycat, which does count for damage points as Pussycat drives around, desperately trying to get unstuck from Sumpthing.

Sumpthing holding its own against Pussycat!

As the robots are pinned, Sumpthing drops down its arm. That's right, boys, score those aggression points! Finally, with some help from Refbot, Sumpthing and Pussycat are unglued from each other. Pussycat then goes after the spinning-in-circles SMIDSY, 'cause fuck 'em, points are points. Seeing that this is a cheap way to get points, Sumpthing ALSO decides to go after SMIDSY, but are probably scoring less points because they have no saws. Finally, SMIDSY, who again is just driving in circles, drives just a little too close to the pit. Pussycat shoves them in, scoring mega points, babyyy! This leaves just Pussycat and Sumpthing left in the fight. But nothing more happens as the fight goes to the judges. To be honest, Sumpthing did a lot better than I thought they would. I thought Pussycat would just KO them quickly, but instead they managed to take Pussycat - Series 4 Runner-Up, Winner of the Extreme 1 Tag Team Terro,r and Annihilator 1 Champion, that Pussycat - to a judges' decision. And while it wasn't really close, Sumpthing was sort of holding its own against the far superior machine, so good work Sumpthing!

After that fight, Sumpthing and SMIDSY apparently got together and decided that they should team up and enter the Tag Team Terror together. Or they got randomly paired. I don't really know how that all actually worked! Their opponents in the first round are that sexist jerk lobster Thermidor 2 and its partner, the shiny dog of war, Cerberus.

GET OUT OF THEIR MOUTH!

Naturally being the better robot, SMIDSY would start the fight (22:39 third video) against, surprisingly, Cerberus, which is weird. SMIDSY immediately drives straight into the jaws of Cerberus… which, uh, guys, probably not a good start. The two spin in circles, trying to push each other around. Cerberus then lets go of SMIDSY before landing a broadside attack with its tail as SMIDSY attempts to reposition. After a little bit of bumping, SMIDSY hits Cerberus with its backside spinning disc, putting some dents in the shiny tail of Cerberus before deciding to tag in Sumpthing! Oh wait, nevermind guys, SMIDSY decided to just hit Sumpthing for no reason! SMIDSY then drives right back into the jaws of Cerberus, which, guys, stop driving into the crushing jaws! Drive anywhere else!

Sumpthing once again breaking itself

Apparently SMIDSY is having really bad radio problems, because they just drive right into the arena wall, stuck in forward drive and unable to move. So with SMIDSY dead, Sumpthing joins the fray in an attempt to salvage the situation. This doesn't last for very long because that misogynistic crustacean Thermidor 2 ILLEGALLY enters the fight and flips Sumpthing. The flip causes Sumpthing's spikes to drive into the ground. Because of this, Sumpthing is unable to move and both him and SMIDSY are counted out after a less-than-stellar display.

Despite a less-than-impressive résumé in Series 5 and Extreme 1, Sumpthing still managed to qualify for Series 6, defeating two unknown robots and Turtle Terror, which is, I kid you not, the only robot with a worse win-loss record than Sumpthing (no I will not be covering Turtle Terror)! Realizing that the saws were stupid, Sumpthing would go back to ole reliable, AKA the pickaxe.

Placed in Heat J, Sumpthing would face off with the 6th-seeded fellow axe bot Dominator 2, the combo lifter and spiked hammer bot Hydra, and finally Axe-C-Dent, who despite the name is using a hammer. Get your story straight!

The fight begins (18:26, first video) with Hydra quickly flipping over Axe-C-Dent in like two seconds, immobilizing it because, of course, it doesn't have a self-righter! That move leaves three robots remaining in this fight. Sumpthing really doesn't do a whole lot this fight. They attempt to face off against Hydra but are absolutely dominated by Hydra and pushed into the CPZ, where fellow axe bot Shunt shows them no mercy. As Sumpthing is being axed by Shunt and Axe-C-Dent is being counted out by Refbot, Hydra is kicking the shit out of Dominator 2. They're throwing them all over the arena and axing the shit out of them; it's really impressive.

Sumpthing's fight "highlight"

But back to our hero Sumpthing! They manage to escape the grasp of Shunt and attempt to get back in the fray. But I don't know what they do, because there's no real focus on them. Instead, the focus is on Growler picking on the counted-out Axe-C-Dent and Hydra and Dominator 2 slugging it out. Sumpthing finally manages to get something going, ramming the backside of Dominator 2 and pushing them slightly. At some point, Axe-C-Dent gets pushed back onto its wheels and Dominator 2 and Hydra land some blows on it before Hydra flips it back over. Sumpthing then launches itself at Hydra, ramming it, but Hydra quickly turns the tables on Sumpthing by pushing it into Growler.

RIP Axe-C-Dent, killed by floor flipper

Sumpthing and Hydra briefly team up against Dominator 2 when suddenly Axe-C-Dent is launched from the floor flipper. They actually hit Hydra while going through the air, nearly toppling Hydra over before just exploding when they hit the ground. It's pretty cool. Suddenly Sumpthing is being counted out because I guess at some point they lost mobility? I don't know when it happened exactly, but, yeah, one of their tires isn't spinning. So Sumpthing is counted out after a very chaotic fight with a very underwhelming performance from Sumpthing.

This would be the last time Sumpthing would fight in the main Series of Robot Wars, but Sumpthing would make one last appearance in Extreme 2. After the rousi