The 'Shroom:Issue VI

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The 'Shroom
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Issue VI June 9th, 2007 About The 'Shroom

From the Mushroom Vaults
Review: SPM
Monty Mole
Upcoming Games
May Report
Great Gonzo
Fake News
Fun Section
TheGreatBlockyBoo, Plumber
Editor's Notes

From the Mushroom Vaults

by 3dhammer.gif 3D, late, as usual! 3dhammer.gif

FTMV: Super (Hard) Secrets and the Case of the Missing Section!

Yello! This is 3D, reporting for cheats and tips. Unfortunately, this edition is extra-small. Why? Because half was to be written by Max2. Due to personal issues, his section was not completed on time. So we'll just have to make the next one bigger to make up for it, won't we? Oh, and Max's section most likely will be in the next issue. If not, sue me for $3,140,000 already. Now let's move!

Are we done here? ~ Axem Green?

It’s Not Called Secret For Nothing

Yup. The long-awaited Secret World. If you puzzle through it long enough, you’ll discover its secrets, but why do that when you can have a super-cool guide?


A rather easy start to the world, you must climb up, up, UP… then down, down, down this level. Use the springboards and Magic Vines to the max. After exiting the first area, use the two P-Switches to race across the chasm. Don’t hit them both at once; hit one, carry the other, and hit the second when you see the Amazin’ Flying Hammer Bro. It’ll give you more time to conk him out and reach the exit.


This level is, by far, the hardest level of the game. Don’t worry; after some practice you should be able to get through it without too much trouble. About four years of practice should do it.

You need lot of strategy for this one. Smash the P-Block at the beginning of the level. After you come to the last pipe, leap off it, but hit the trampoline as you go down to hit the “?” Block and get a P-Balloon. Jump on the trampoline again to grab the Balloon. Now, soon you’ll come across a second “?” Block. Here’s a picture of the one you want to hit:

But there’s a catch. DO NOT grab the balloon after it pops out. Instead, keep going as it free-floats along the level. When you see the Volcano Lotuses, you should be flashing, as the P-Balloon wears off. The free-floating P-Balloon should be floating above a Volcano Lotus on a “?” Block. Now, this is the tough part. If you dawdle on this, the Balloon will float too high and be lost. Go below the Lotus, hit the block it perches on, then grab the Balloon before it soars into obscurity.

The rest is hard, but as a rule, try to stay obscured in the very, very top of the screen. If a Chargin’ Chuck starts kicking footballs too close for comfort, duck underneath him and bash his “?” Block platform to knock him off. It’s a good idea to have a cape, too, for this level, so you can float to the ending goal if you run out of juice too fast.

Way Cool

There is almost NO advice I can give for this level. Use the switches wisely. Practice makes perfect here. Stock up on lives for this high-up level. If you have a cape, use it wisely to get past the flying buzz saws and Fuzzies!


Just use a cape for this level. But if you don’t know how to use the cape, here’s a tip: wait to smash the P-Switch near the middle of the level until you’re at the area with icy platforms, then use the coin-platforms to reach a ?-Block with a Starman.


Use a Yoshi here to gobble enemies and berries. If you can eat all the berries, a cloud will appear with an item to make things easier. This is one of the most fun levels in the game. There are lots of items, enemies, and cool tricks to pull off. Using a Starman here can earn you lots of 1-Ups!


If you can get past the first Flyin’ Hammer Bro., you’ve got a good idea of the rest of the level. Use the tide to your advantage and avoid the Nippers! There is no info I cann give you to ease this level up. Good luck!


Hard. Very hard. If you can get a cape, you can fly across the whole level, but otherwise, you’re on your own. Jump off the Bullet Bills on the first part of the level to get leverage. Keep the trampoline you come across and bounce off the Bullet Bills to the pipe; use the trampoline to get over the tube. If you can do that, you’re pretty good. Luigi riding Yoshi is recommended, since Yoshi can spit enemies when Luigi rides him. The second part is brutal, but use Yoshi to gobble as many enemies as possible.


The final level! And one of the easiest, too! Just hope, skip, and jump over the enemies, and use Yoshi to eat the berries for a time boost. There’s a special message at the end, too!

Montly Challenge

Beat a Mario Kart Time Trial ghost. Any ghost. This might be a hint as to the next FTMV will be about, but you may never know...

~ 3D

Review:Super Paper Mario

by Phoenix Rider

What’s going on out there in gaming land? June is here, and you know what that means: summer. Now that you’re free, you’ll probably have a lot more free time. Here’s a look into a recently released game long overdue for a review, Super Paper Mario!

Gameplay- *****

Two words: Best controls ever. Er…yeah. The Wii Remote is held sideways for that retro Mario Bros. style-feel, the 2 button being the all-around action button. Each character has their own special abilities, and you’ll need to use them all to make it far in the game. It’s very innovative and fun. However, as you level up, the game gets a mite too easy. Bosses can be defeated faster than you can, say, zap up a TV dinner in the microwave. Still the Pit Of 100 Trials returns and does not disappoint. It’s not too easy, not too difficult, still equally frustrating should you lose. Great gameplay feels natural even with the added functions of the Wii Remote.

Sound- ****

The good news is SPM has a different tune for almost every place. The bad news is it doesn’t have a different tune for EVERY place. Still, the variety’s all here. Lineland has your run-of-the-mill music, reminiscent of Petal Meadows from Thousand-Year Door. Land of the Cragnons, meanwhile, uses drums for a prehistoric feel. Let’s face it, the game would get rather bland without the music there. You may not notice it when it’s there, but you would definitely notice if it wasn’t.

Sound effects such as Mario jumping and Peach opening her parasol add some ambience. However, Nintendo once AGAIN forwent voice acting. It seems they’re just not getting the hint. That alone prevented this section from getting a 5.

Graphics- ***+

Well, what do you expect? It’s Paper Mario, as I said in my review for The Thousand-Year Door. I’m not a big fan of the geometrical square look. Still, at least the character models look more or less unchanged from the previous installment. The vast variety of new enemies won me over, though. I’m a fan of the Megabites. They’re all drawn very well and look nothing like the blocky landscapes in which they appear. Still, some disappointed me. *coughMimicough* Anyway, the character and enemymodels were drawn and executed superbly.

Replay Value- *

Nada. Zilch. None. Unless you’re a die-hard fan of the series. For one thing, it seems like such a hassle knowing you have to pass things up that are right there because you don’t have a certain ability. SPM does this quite a bit. You might want to just play your old file and try and get everything, but there’s almost no reason to go through the whole story again. The ending was very, very horrible as well. Again, this is only this humble reviewer’s opinion but, take it as a caveat.

Overall- ****

SPM is a great rent or buy. The gameplay is good, there are more unpredictable plot events than an episode of 24, with plenty of in-jokes and laugh out loud moments. Breaking of the fourth wall is not uncommon. The Wii Remote allows you to really get into the game because, well, that’s what it was designed to do. And it succeeds. Great sound you can hum along to, and wonderful enemy and character animations. Just, no replay value.

Upcoming Games

by SaudyTalk!

I am unaccustomed as to how Grodus does this section, and he quit, so this is going to be very experimental this month.

Upcoming Games are:

  • Donkey Jet
  • Donkey Kong Wii
  • Donkey Kong: Banana Kingdom
  • Donkey Kong: Jungle Climber
  • Itadaki Street DS
  • Mario & Sonic at the Olympic Games
  • Mario Kart Arcade GP 2
  • Super Mario Galaxy
  • Super Smash Bros. Brawl

Okay..... Donkey Jet? Say wha.... Nintendo sure is original. I think it looks like a fun game. I might just buy it. That'd be the first new Donky Kong-centric game I'll have owned since Donkey Kong 64. Yeah, so the premise is obvious. You're Donkey Kong characters with Jet-Barrels on your feet, and you race to the finish. Sounds fun.

Donkey Kong Wii..... Is most likely a direct sequel to Donkey Kong 64, which would be cool. Not much on this one, and information is likely to change.

Donkey Kong: Banana Kingdom..... is a sequel to Jungle Fever in the arcade style. An American release is unlikely, but possible. More on this game next month.

Donkey Kong: Jungle Climber..... A lot of Donkey Kong this time around, eh? The thing about this game is that we know a little more about it. Its a sequel King of Swing, and is for the DS. Expect more on this one next month.

Itadaki Street DS....... I have no clue. This is one of those things that will get released in America only after I get to see Elvis: Live! with Big Foot on Stage. In fact, its a Japan-Only game similar to Mario Party.

Mario & Sonic go t-...... I'm not touching this one, sorry.

Mario Kart Arcade GP 2...... Is the sequel to the best arcade racing game EVER! I just hope Pac-Man is in this one, too.

Super Mario Galaxy..... Some of you think I dissed this game last month. I didn't. I'm looking forward to this game, I know Plumber and Bean are, I think everyone is, actually. Its the true sequel to 64. SMS was OKAY, but it just wasn't the same, and this game right here looks crazy awesome. Its been in the works for years, so they've definitely put a lot into this one. The game will be released sometime this year, probably in the third or fourth quarter.

Super Smash Bros. Brawl...... is nearing fruitation, and no one can wait. Its supposedly the best installment yet. To tide you all over, I suggest Super Smash Flash.

Well guys, I believe that's it. This was Hk, taking over for Grodus, if want this job, see Wayoshi or me about taking over next month.

“It is a mistake to think you can solve any major problems just with potatoes.”
Douglas Adams on Problems


by SaudyTalk!

And here it is. Welcome, all. Today, I'll tackle the subjects of cursing, Featured Articles, and Stupidity.

Cursing is nasty, and there are YOUNG CHILDREN on this site. Some of you don't get that. I can't understand it. Why would you even need to use those words in the chat, or on your page, or someone's talk page. I'm not saying you should keep it to a minimum. I'm saying it should stop altogether, except in that one situation on the Donkey Kong 64 article. That's it. No other exceptions are to be made or allowed, please. Its silly. Its nasty. Its not cool. No one wants to read that stuff. DB is twelve, please give him a break from this kind of stuff.

Featured Articles. They may be returning. But in a different way than you could ever had imagined. The new system is called PAIR, or Panel for Article Improvement and Recognition. Its a nice little thing Wayoshi and I came up with that will hopefully solve all the problems we have had in the past. Its similar to peer revisions, but not entirely. For more, check out the proposals page. There is a link there from PipePlaza, is you're lazy. Its also on the sidebar, if you're even more lazy than the seven guys who just clicked the link to PipePlaza because they didn't bother to look at the link right above it.

Stupidity. I, personally, am done with it. I'm sick articles like the Three-Hit Rule. That article was awful. It had bad grammar, it was not encyclopedic in the slightest. It was silly. It was stupid. I'm glad its gone. Articles like that don't survive for a reason. You know what else is stupid? The way people always say "PipePlaza is cool, revive it!" So I go and try. And no one sticks with it but me. Without that thing you ignore, there would never have been a 'Shroom. Please give it its props.

No e-mails this month, not even a fake one. If you want one next month, send it in yourself at

"Criminals are a superstitious cowardly lot."
Batman, Arkham Asylum: A Serious House on Serious Earth


by RAP.pngRAP...

Yo guys, welcome to the wonderful world of RAP with various entertainment known as me!!! You can also call me Ryan if you want. Here, I review usually funny Mario clips all over this crazy world of directing. Be advised that will contain blood and/or crude humor in these things. Also, I will review fan-made games, web-based or as in an application program starting with 2 reviews of the Mario fan-based games. So… LET’S GET THE SHOW GOING!!! *runs into the review chair*

Video Entertainment

Yoshi's Island 3 (VGDC)

This movie is actually the third series came to blast from the past since Yoshi’s Island (VGDC) came out into your hometowns called HI-V-TV. Yoshi and Baby Mario are back with a new adventure to humor themselves, anyone in Yoshi’s island, and mostly… YOU!!!!!!!!!. You can watch 3 new scenes to laugh at to blow your mind up!!!! They include three completely original scenes to laugh it... 3 scenes instead of the joke about enemies and other obstacles knocking Baby Mario to the pre-duction section. The Movie also contains some Easter eggs, like… At the title screen, when Yoshi sits on the grass after running licking at the frog; I dare you to click the Yoshi Head. This movie is created by ‘’’Randy Solem’’’, another guy from Newgrounds. He is also the webmaster of, which has also has a lot of Videos to laugh at; like comedy and BBs booming in your room!! So if you want blasting comedy with Yoshi hanging with Baby Mario around his neck in their various adventures… Go to your mom’s room; Err.. I mean here!

SMB: Game Over (1up)

Mario goes on a classical adventure on rescuing Princess Peach from Bowser… again… Additionally, it contains crazy humor that you might wanna watch it even though old things are clearly new things to people who haven’t seen an item before; yeah like the oldest movies in the world. As of; Luigi attempts to steal the fame from Mario by collecting Coins to be rich and rescuing Princess Peach for the first time. As time goes, things will get wacky… Hey, is that a cloud in the ocean?? What matter; Every time Mario encounters Luigi; Mario has to do something to knock Luigi like a snap to it. Additionally, there is very usual stuff occurred in the game; it won’t be in the actual game. As of, the graphics are pure-classic as though it came from the SMB+AS version. No wonder… This movie is created by the famous ‘’’Matt Morandi’’’ another user from Newgrounds (DUH…) and actually owns a website full of videos to watch for humor and pie!!! The website is… So crazyhead; if you want a classic adventure with Mario and the goofing off Luigi around in the video; go… Here!! Whoa, that time already??

Whew! I thought I’m not done with these oldies, OK guys and guy-yas! The for the new add-on for my section; THE GAME SECTION!!! Ta…ta-Ta-TA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! GAME TIME FOR THE RAPSTER!!!!!

Game Entertainment

Bullet Bill 2

This squeal seriously has no plot whatsoever (Duh, some games like Collapse have no plot just like simple puzzle games do for all humanity). The thing is that you can use the mouse to move the Bullet Bill on the screen, there; you will see a Score Bar which you have a dud ZERO. The player can gain points by crashing into Brick Blocks as obstacles pass by. The player can hit enemies to get points. Usually, in the middle of the level gives you a checkpoint. As of, the Bullet Bill also has to avoid obstacles like Warp Pipes or Ledges (or your TV in the way). Every end of the level you beaten will give you g password to continue playing the game. The main gameplay of the game is the interaction with enemies, for example in every castle it contains a Hammer Brother. At the end of the castle level, you fight a boss. After defeating it; you get a character password to unlock; not too shabby though. The biggest con of the game is there is not enough challenge in the game, like for instance; grass levels only contain Goombas. That’s dumbfully not challenging enough as off. For now, fans are pleased with this squeal as the game focuses on the Scoreboard. The game is created by ‘’’Psycosis91’’’ a guy from newgrounds and whatever they say about their life. So dude, if you want to play this squeal while having free time of your lazy life; Go to…

Infinite Mario Bros!

Yeah, like I’m goanna fall for it, but I did, I fell down into your PS3 called life, Eh? OK, back to your mom’s house I mean my review… In this game, it features a map like from Super Mario Bros. 3, but commonly it’s RANDOM! Yeah, that’s right, even the levels are randomly produced by process, that’s how that that’s the name of the game. Basically, there is just too MUCH RANDOM at fest! As well as the controls are pretty accurate. Some levels have different obstacles like in Fortresses, they have only Bullet Bill Cannons installed there and Underground levels only have Jumping Piranha Plants inside Warp Pipes. Also, since the music is played in MIDI; the music is well played like the Mario music (I wonder if there’s music in a Note Block BLEEP!!!!!!!!!!!). Unfortunately, the game is not finished as the creator made a source code incase anyone will remake the game and the programming. The game is created by ‘’’Markus Persson’’’, a game programmer who works in and the owner of Mojang Specifications. So, if you want powered fun and random things that can happen to you more likely… Go to that pit stop there!! I hope you will try to break the score because it WON’T work!!!

So guys, I hope you have fun with the new add-on I put in my section of Da Shroom!! In next time; I might review 3 game reviews and 3 video reviews waiting up for your next package of the day; MIGHT…. So… See-ya-late-ta-guy-yas!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *goes to making the card game*

May Report 

by Wa Yoshihead.png TC@Y


Two words sum up the statistics for May: below-average.
April Statistics
Statistic As of 18:45P, 3 May* As of 19:00P, 3 June* Total for May % of Change
Page Views 12,265,130 14,792,790 2,567,660 20.61%
Views per Edit 78.39 81.52 3.99%
Page Edits 156,462 181,453 24,991 15.97%
Edits per Page 7.42 7.83 5.25%
# of Articles 5,926 6,282 356 6.01%
# of Pages 21,100 23,175 2,075 9.83%
# of Files 6,571 7,113 542 8.25%
# of Users 1,595 1,797 202 12.66%
*All times EDT. I have decided to do a yearly comparison, instead of a biyearly.

New ACTIVE Users

Just 202? Not bad, still, but only one has really been a contributor (that is, working in the main namespace): Pokemon DP (talk) (*).


A lot of bad news this month. Let's get done with that first:

  • Two major sysops, Son of Suns, and KPH2293, left the wiki; SoS because of stress of working and school, KPH because of inactivity and feeling irritated from many users here (identities unknown). We are still chugging along, but it will take some time to adjust.
  • As shown above, stats are down. This can be partially attributed to the leaving of the preceding, but also just a slow month. It happens, if June is another bad month there may be some concern.
  • FAs were uplifted after they were considered "bad quality" and have been in confusion for the month.

Now the good:

  • New system "PAIR" (see Proposals page) may fix FAs by next month.
  • Great Gonzo is our 13th sysop. We now have 9 active.
  • Mario Award voting starts TOMORROW. 30 awards, many nominees for each. Be sure to vote, guest or member! Email likely required.

Keep up the good work on the wiki to get those stats back up to par.


by Mario riding YoshiXzelionETC

Interview with RAP

GG: How did you find the wiki?
RAP: When I first went around the Super Mario War Forums, I was thinking of ideas, but then I starting to ran out of ideas to make the game more good. SO I thought, why type So I did, and there it was; it has information about the Mario series; so I decided to cut off the Super Mario War Forums and join here.

GG: Why did you decide to licensees all the unliscened pics here at the wiki?
RAP: When I'm starting to think of new ways of helping the wiki such as Mario Party mini-game articles, I decided to attempt to organize the images while learning how to put licenses.

GG: Did you ever get welcomed to the wiki, and if so by who?
RAP: I got welcomed by 3D while making Mario Party series mini-game articles, he said that he actually like one of my articles.

GG: What was your first edit?
RAP: I believe my first edit is Game Guy Space, again I made Mario Party series articles when coming here. BTW, it is also my first article made by me.

GG: What’s your favorite article?
RAP: My favorite article would be Bowser, basically it has detailed summaries within it, I just wish it could be expanded it more...

GG: Why do you like Lemmy?
RAP: Basically I like eating much ice cream like Lemmy as he liked cold stuff, also I also like the rainbow hair he had and how wacky he is, like as me... *Smiles*

GG: Do you think this is the last question?
RAP: Yes, I think so

GG: Are you mad you got the last question wrong?
RAP: Wha??

GG: Well, thats it, Thanks, *Winks*
RAP: Thank you!

Interview with YellowYoshi398

GG: How did you find this wiki?
YY398: I believe I first stumbled upon it through a link from Wikipedia; one of those "Luigi's page at the Super Mario Wiki" links at the end of pages.

GG: What’s your favorite article?
YY398: I don't know... I like almost everything in Category:Implied, especially if the article's nice and bulky. I suppose I don't really have a favorite... I really like Hammer Bro., for one, though. Not that it's in the implied category.

GG: Is there a memory here that sticks out among the rest?
YY398: Definitely when Tonya Logan attacked, and how we all fought her... I loved that.

GG: What’s your favorite type of cheese?
YY398: Haha. Probably American... but pepper jack is good, too, especially since everyone seems to hate it.

GG: What’s your favorite article to edit?
YY398: That's a toughie... I used to edit Hammer Bro. a lot (usually adding to its History section), but I've kinda left it and it's been doing good without me. I don't really have a favorite article to edit; I just try to do my best with making edits all around.

GG: What was your first article you created?
YY398: Star Realm

GG: Who’s your favorite Marioverse character?
YY398: Yoshi... or Yellow Yoshi. I've honestly never even THOUGHT of dividing the two among my favorite characters.

GG: What’s your favorite Video Game
YY398: Super Mario World 2: Yoshi's Island, and I mean the original.

GG: What's your least favorite game?
YY398: That's pretty hard... If you're talking Mario, I found Yoshi's Cookie to be rather unsatisfying. I doubt that's my least favorite game of all time, but I don't buy many bad games... so I can't really think of anything else...

GG: What are your favorite two foods?
YY398: Cheese and chili dogs.

GG: Do you think this is the last question?
YY398: Ah-HA! I'll have to do some deducing for that... I'd say it is, since it was for KPH. Wink

GG: Yeppers it is, Thanks YellowYoshi398
YY398: Any time! 'Twas an honor.

Fake News

by Confused and the Fake News staff

Poll of the Month

Who is the strongest in terms of physical strength?

A. Donkey Kong
B. O'Chunks
C. Kudgel
D. Bowser

Vote Here!

Updated Info

Mario Party 8 Mini-games

This month, we cover the exciting new entry into the Mario Party series, Mario Party 8! We snuck into Hudson headquarters and got sneak peek at the developing game, although by the time we'll get to post this, the game will be out. Mario Party 8 introduces some of the most fun mini-games ever and we list the top five here. Note: Some games may not appear in final version, which is probably the version you'll be playing.
One game is real. Can you find it?

  • Mushroom Fighter – in this game, the player will have a boxing match with another player in a tournament style. The last one standing wins the mini-game and the cool looking belt.
  • Chomp 'em Up – in this game, the players choose Chain Chomps to pit against other Chain Chomps. Pick the one you think is strongest and let 'er rip! Whoever's Chain Chomp is standing at the end wins.
  • The 200 Yard Dash – players shake the Wii Remote and press the corresponding buttons on the screen to make your character run. Whoever can reach the end first wins the mini-game.
  • Spikes – spikes will appear all over the field, causing any players who touch it to become paralyzed. However, this paralysis lasts longer than the one caused by Earthquake.
  • Remix Battle – the players dance to the tune and follow the song. Follow the instructions on the screen step-by-step. Whoever is the last one dancing wins the mini-game.

News Highlight

This section is currently not available.

Local News


3dejong and Max along with their cheese.

In today’s big news two lucky people/friends 3dejong and Max2 won the Happy LuckyLottery. Collecting 2,000 Contributions and 2 Tons of Cheese each. In history only two other users have won the lottery, but two people at the same time was outrageous. The winning number was “232323”. When asked about they’re luck they said this :
Max2: I can’t believe I won!
3dejong: C|-|3353 4 a y34r NO WAI! (translation:Cheese for a year NO WAY!)

When asked what they were going to do with the contributions they answered with this:

Max2: Well now I can live in piece at my house with my Dog = Max.
3dejong D0|\|4t3 50|\/|3 2 C|-|4r1ty (translation: Donate Some to Charity)

Haunted Cabin?

A small footage of the ghost.

Also in the news we traveled to Poshley Heights via the Excess Express to see if Cabin 004 was really haunted. When we arrived the room seemed normal so Kylie Koopa and her camera left the room to eat, not knowing that camera was left on, nestled next to the bed. When they returned they noticed the problem, Kylie suggested that they’d watch the video. When watching they spotted Ghost T. in the cabin. A few words about the wall paper and jumping through a pic was said by the estranged Ghost.

Interview of the Month

Interview with the Axem Rangers


3D: Yello! This is 3D, interviewing the Axem Rangers for the world-infamous Fake News!
Axem Red: We fight for evil!
Axem Black: We live for disorder!
Axem Green: We like what we do!
Axem Pink: We struggle for chaos!
Axem Yellow: We are... line?

The scene of the interview.

3D: Sounds like you are one kamikaze fighting force.
Axem Red: We used to be; especially while we were serving Smithy. But after he was defeated by that red-clothed guy, we decided to use Blade as a tour ship and make people pay for tours of the Mushroom Kingdom.
3D: But you still stick together, I believe.
Axem Black: Yup. Even if Yellow gets into trouble, we all help out.
Axem Yellow: Hey! I only got you into trouble once! And that was ecause I slipped on a ‘Shroom Shake that a Toad spilled and crash-landed us on the Shroob home world!
Axem Pink: You have an answer for everything, Yellow.
Axem Red: Yeah, an answer for everything but questions.
Axem Green: Am I ever gonna get a line?
3D: OK, let’s begin the questions. Where did you come from?
Axem Green: We’re natives of Smithy’s dimension; we made our living by fighting for a price. Smithy bribed us to battle any comers who might cause trouble for him.
Axem Red: But we realized his evil purposes would only lead to estruction of the universe, so we decided to turn against him.
Axem Pink: Liar! The only reason we quit was because he wouldn’t pay for our repairs to Blade after Yellow crashed him.
Axem Red: No way! I realized early on that I would have to…
Axem Yellow: HEY! I told you it wasn’t my fault we crashed and…
Axem Black: Shut up! You’re fogging my shades!
Axem Green: Am I ever gonna get to say anything more?
Axem Black: Where’d that gavel come from?
3D: No idea. Now, for my next question. What happened to you after you crashed in Barrel Volcano?
Axem Black: We floated on Yellow to the edge.
Axem Pink: It was a comfy ride.
Axem Yellow: Was that an insult or a compliment?
Axem Green: I used magic to protect us from burns from the lava.
Axem Black: We ended up on Circuit Break Island and paid through the nose for some beetle with a wrench on his back to repair our ship.
Axem Red: We decided to use Blade for tours. But later, on a tour, Yellow crashed us on the Shroob homeworld.
Axem Green: To keep the Shroobs from killing us and our tourists, I bribed them with a time machine and special technology that would allow them to brainwash other species of creatures for them. Then we split back for the Mushroom Planet..
Axem Pink: Yeah, and I saw in the news that the Mushroom Kingdom of the past had been invaded by purple mushroom-like creatures that were brainwashing Mushroom species and spreading to the future and present. Any connection, Green?
Axem Red: You should use more forethought and diplomacy in your dealings with foreign…
Axem Yellow: I’m hungry!
Axem Black: You just ate a ‘Shroom Cake and had two cans of Able Juice!
Axem Yellow: I’m STILL hungry.
3D: One last question. If you were paid enough, would you fight back on the side of evil?
Axem Green: How DARE you instigate that against us? Just for that, we blast you with our secret weapon!
*Blade Cannon pops up from under auditorium*
3D: How’d that happen?
Axem Green: Magic.
Axem Black: HA! I planted that under the auditorium in case someone would insult us.
Axem Red: That shows great forethought and…
Axem Pink: Hey! My seat doesn’t match my purse and…
Axem Yellow: If you’d close your big bazoo and quit babbling about fashion…
Axem Red: All together now!
*3D is blasted with energy! 3D lost 500 HP!*
Axem Red: We defeated the jerk who insulted us!
Axem Yellow: Is there a shop anywhere near here? I need a ‘Shroom Cake…
*Blade crashes through roof and destroys auditorium*
Axem Red: Everyone on Blade!
Axem Black: How’d that happen?
Axem Green: Magic.
Axem Yellow: HA! I happen to know that I parked it on the roof in case someone…
Axem Green: IF you’d close YOUR big yap-hole and LET me explain…
*Blade flies into distance*
Axem Pink: Red, would we fight on the side of evil if anyone bribed us enough?
Axem Red: What a silly question!
Axem Pink: Good. I’m glad to know your love of money wouldn’t…
Axem Red: Of COURSE we would!
Axem Pink: You JERK!
*slaps Red*
*Back at the auditorium…*
3D: Next… time… I’ll… be… interviewing… someone… without… weapons… of... mass… destruction…


Cooking Section

Putrid Wormy Apple Pie

WARNING: Area restricted to all people who stump on a lady's contact lenses, obviously on purpose. This is deadly serious. We may discuss it unless you wear overalls and have a funny 'stache. If you apply to that description, then you can go go away. I hate you.

Welcome to Zess T's Cookin'! I'm Zess T., the best chef in Rogueport. The only one, in fact, since Podley buys his food online. From now on, I'll be revealing my exclusive, delicious recipes to average people like YOU. I'm that nice. Today we will be cooking a recipe I made for a Putrid Piranha Food Contest, the Putrid Wormy Apple Pie. Its delicious content and perfect mix of flavors will leave a smile on your face, I can assure it! Unless you are a Putrid Piranha. Then you will absolutely love it.

Ingredients (For 6 people):

  • 3 Apples
  • 15 Garden Worms
  • 2 Ratooey Tails
  • 500 grams of Flour
  • 700 grams of Sugar
  • 5 Eggs
  • 2 80's CDs
  • Fertile Soil
  • Cleanser (Optional)
  • Aspirins (Optional)

Note the recipe works better with rotten apples, although normal apples are fine, too.


First of all, get a huge bowl and throw some random fertile soil in it. Bake with your fingers and introduce the bowl into the microwave for 5 minutes. While the soil gets warm, grab your Garden Worms and cut them in several pieces. Be sure to spread the least blood possible - it's the best part of them, alongside the jelly-like eyes.


Once the soil is boiling inside your excuse of a good microwave, take it out and toss the eggs as hard as you can into the bowl, trying to break them inside the actual bowl. Once that's done, take your worm pieces and throw them into the mix. Bake well with a wooden spoon, always clock-wise. This helps it look like a swirly tornado, and it's PRETTY. Sue me. Now, pick your 80's CDs and use a butter knife to cut them into heart-shaped figures. For some reason I have been unable to check, this makes the dessert taste much better. Mix again and throw the other ingredients in whichever order, however you like. Each order gives a different flavor to the pie... choose wisely! Just don't throw the Ratooey Tails after the sugar. That's not good. At all. Bake and mix well, and kick your bowl into the oven. Yes, the bowl too. And kick it. Kind of like if you were about to score in a soccer match. Like that. Wait around thirty minutes and take your melted bowl out of the oven. Pour in a beautiful container or whatever you want to use and optionally decorate the pie with delicious Cleanser, preferabily Shroom-O-Matic or Tide. And if you are cool, like me, then also add aspirins on top for a neat presentation. Serve cold or warm.

This dessert is perfect for special occasions, like a hamster's funeral or the marriage of that aunt you hate so much. Eating too much could poison you, suck all of your Heart Points and give them to the opponent, or just plain kill you. So watch out.

Well, kids, that's it for today. Next time we will be a featuring an even better dish for those of you who aren't satisfied with simple desserts. The next one will take things TO THE NEXT LEVEL, know what I mean? Heh. Of course you don't. I'm so clever.

Bye, and 'til the next time! Zess T. out!

Kooky Cookie

Welcome to the Bronze Chef, where every month we create something ineffably delectable! This month our amazing recipe is for the Kooky Cookie. This delectable consumable can be prepared in a variety of ways and tastes so mouth-wateringly amazing, the Yoshi Cookie would slink off-stage embarrassed. Needless to say, this cookie is good. Now, most people would tell you that the best way to prepare this treat is with Cake Mix and a Koopa Leaf. You can do that if you want, as its your choice, and I can't make that decision for you, it is up to you. To prepare it this way, you need to travel to Koopa Village, which is a very lovely town, and the walk there is amazing, but then you need to walk to Toad Town. To combat this, I proposed that there may be a way to do this without leaving Toad Town. I found quickly that there is. On the west side of town, the Shy Guy's Toy Box contains all the ingredients you need to prepare this treat. Head off to the Shy Guy playground, near the blue station. It is here that we find both Cake Mix, the main ingredient, and Maple Syrup, the mysterious substance that replaces the Koopa Leaf. After the trek back to your abode, you may wish to pre-heat your oven to 350 degrees. Mix the Cake Mix with one half a cup of water, and an egg. Slowly add the Maple Syrup. Heat in oven at 350 degrees for ten minutes. Serves only one, although the quality more than makes up for the quantity. This cookie restores 15 FP, and may cause status effects such as Invisibility, Electrification, and Sleep.

Travel Guide

Gwarhar Lagoon

Come and see the fabulous Gwarhar Lagoon! Nestled in the southern corner of the lush Beanbean Kingdom, this tropical resort comes with everything! Points of interest include the famous Gwarhar Stone Bridge, a mysterious bridge made of stepping stones just situated in the water. No one knows how it got there, but rumor has it that certain statues around the resort hold the key. A great spot for fishing, too!

Looking for a little peace and tranquility? Come and relax in the Jellyfish Sisters’ Relaxation Room. This spa will massage away all your troubles for just 200 coins per person per hour!* The proprietors, Gigi and Merri, have between them over 30 years** experience in top-of-the-line therapeutic techniques. “One of them is guaranteed to work!” says Merri. Don’t miss it!


Lodging prices start at just 60 coins a night. You’ll get a fabulous room nestled right in the cliffs of the lagoon for easy access to the beach and pavilion. Complete with room service, air conditioning, and much much more!

Buy your ticket to Gwarhar Lagoon today for only 80 coins.*** Go to www.gwarharnow.con for details. See you on the beach!

*Refunds not available.
**In Jellyfish years. In human terms, this equates to approximately six weeks.
***For underwater travel. Surface travel is an additional 120 coins, and air travel is an additional 300 coins.


Here I am!

When I arrived at Glitzville to see its majestic beauty, I was greeted by a Man in a Red Hat and a Bandaged Koopa. Aside from that the main Attractions include the Glitz Pit. Also the best place for food is Mr. Hoggle’s Hot Dog Stand. Also the Juice Bar is a great place to get to know everyone. The living conditions are high, but pay is pretty good. I got the chance to meet a few special people there. Such as the Wealthy Goldbob Family. Also I met Toodles the kind toad, who had me over for dinner. The Main Attraction is the Glitz Pit, Rawk Hawk can really get people to pile in.

Minor attractions are the fountains, does are fun. Especially if you jump in it. After my short stay here the Atmosphere is nice and the people are nice. Finally I blew all my money at the Souvenir Shop. As my Blimp lifted off I smiled and laid back to rest.


A Great Movie is also Wanted to be Seen by an audience!
Any info should be sent to 1-700-HEYGUYS
Mario enters the matrix, who wouldn't want to see that movie?

Fun Section

by Tadaa!2.gifPlumberTadaaa!.gif and TheGreatBlockyBoo


True/False time! Super Paper Mario!

1. The final gate reached before Sammer's Kingdom was destroyed was the 32nd gate.
2. There is a Sammer Guy who's name refers to Fawful.
3. Mimi is battled three times in the game.
4. End Boss is the only Sammer Guy with a unique type.
5. Dimentio is only fought in Dimension D.
6. Of all Count Bleck's minions, O'Chunks is fought the most times.
7. The only RPG-style fight is against the Underchomp.
8. Shy Guys do not appear anywhere in Super Paper Mario.
9. Moon Clefts are, oddly, not found on the moon.
10. All the doors opened by Pure Hearts are the color of that Pure Heart.

When you're ready, click "show" to see answers! <showhide>__HIDER__<hide>Answers: 1. F   2. T   3. T   4. F   5. F   6. T   7. T   8. F   9. T   10. F   </hide></showhide> 0-1: Three words. Play. The. Games.
2-4: You need to increase your Mario knowledge.
5-6: Hmm... Not bad, but not good either. You could very well use some improvement.
7-9: You really know a lot, but there are still a few things in which you lack knowlege.
10: You are a true Mario series fan. You pretty much need no work on your Mario knowledge.

Riddles of the Pipe

Here’s a nice batch of riddles with a random fact: My Grandma likes to see me play SM64, she thinks it’s a TV show :P

Riddle 1

Please, don’t call me that,
I would rather be called this,
Or maybe that,
It depends what language you use,
But my name is too lame for me
But I forgot what was happening before this
Ah, yes!
You were going past my territory!
Sorry fellow, but this is as far as you go!

Riddle 2

Vitamin A!
Oh, Vitamin A!
Carotene! Oh Carotene!
Anyway, I don’t go places without my friends
Even though I can float
That never stopped that shoe of that plumber, or the scary fire from the monster!
Luckily, I can always make them be quiet and stay as stiff as a scarecrow!

Riddle 3

Unbeatable defense?
Like it matters
What a foolish thing
I can just make them hurt each other!
Plus, they get a fine ‘lickin!
No problem!
It may cost you a bit
But I’m well worth to use on folks with a high defense!

Ready? Click "show" to see answers! <showhide>__HIDER__<hide>

  1. ”Birdetta”
  2. Carroboscis
  3. Gulp


Editor's Notes  

by the Director and Editor-in-Chief

And this is it. The last thing anyone reads. And I'm writing it. Cool.

This issue went about in the least smooth style possible. Wayoshi got sick, and asked who wanted to take over. Guess who? Editor-in-Chief HK-47, at your service. Some three of our crack team of Journalist's quit or didn't show. I wrote one of those pieces for them, the Upcoming Games. No word on Chris, and hopefully I Am Manga will be back next month. The late edition will be released later this week, featuring the Fake News and Mushroom Vaults sections. Other than that, this issue went off fine, and the staff hopes you enjoy it.

I'll be doing this again next month, so see you all then, (probably before!)

Oh, and there's something else different about the 'Shroom this month. See if you figure it out!

"Remember: Your focus determines your reality."
Qui-Gon, Greatest Jedi Knight, Star Wars: Episode I The Phantom Menace


Chris has had a "hectic month" and couldn't write. Confused planned the Fake News differently and will be back next week to finish it off. 3D's parents have slowed him down. Sir Grodus quit because of lost interest, so we once again need another writer for Upcoming Games!!! Contact me on my talk page if you're interested.

Thanks again to Hk for directing this issue. Wa Yoshihead.png TC@Y