The 'Shroom:Issue 136/Fake News
Hey everyone, welcome back to the Fake News! Hope you all enjoyed the special issue last month, and that you're generally having a good summer! Or winter!
I don't really have that much to say here this month, but hope you enjoy the issue! :)
Section of the Month
Tragedy fell over one shady bar last night as its highly esteemed singer Chanterelle mysteriously passed away. Despite the annual Killing Game antics currently taking place, a Killing Game-related death was ruled out, although suspicions were raised when a dismembered parrot was found nearby, and one bar-goer was found diligently counting sand in the nearby harbour.
Chanterelle was a gifted singer, even if she wasn't able to actually write any of her own music, something which is known to have annoyed her manager. “If she doesn't start writing her own music soon, I think I'll kill her!” he is quoted as having previously said. His comments aren't being treated as suspicious. One man known as the Master Poet expressed his sadness about her death, especially since his lyrics will now no longer have a gifted singer to sing them. However, I decided to cut his quotes out of this obituary due to the fact that I really don't like rhymes and apparently that's all he talks in.
Since her death, sales of her albums have skyrocketed, despite there being a price hike. One music shop owner, Toadette said: “Her albums never sold this good before, so I might as well actually make something from this.” Some patrons in the shop were visibly shocked after Toadette spoke, but they still decided to buy the album.
Chanterelle's funeral will be help in two weeks time. She will be buried Club 64, and it's hoped that her body being there will draw in tourists from around the world to visit the old Club where she used to sing. If not, then just have a macabre attraction in the backyard.
TV Tomorrow is back again for the summer schedule. There may be blazing sunshine at this time of year, where you could be outside basking in the warmth, but there is still quality television on, and you might as well watch it while it’s on. After all, going outside is overrated. Anyway, before I bore you with my introductory techniques, let’s get on with the top three shows of tomorrow!
Agents of S.H.R.O.O.M.
New: Chef Mario’s Luncheon Kingdom Delights
Inter-Universe Beach Volleyball Championships
That’s it for the best of tomorrow’s TV. Remember - just because the weather’s hot doesn’t mean you have to ignore the television. I will now probably get criticised by parents worldwide for giving bad messages to their children. Oh well. See you next time (provided no angry parents sue me) on TV Tomorrow!
Waluigi. You know him. You love him. You’d love to date him. He’s a liar, a cheat, and just a Crude Dude with Attitude™. Yet somehow, despite his importance to the Mario franchise and Western culture as a whole, Nintendo has repeatedly jilted him. A few of you may remember 2016’s so-called “Year of Waluigi,” which promised several Waluigi themed games but only yielded a measly two spin-offs (and way too many footnotes). Oh, and a weird Christmas game that everyone pretended to be excited about until realizing how disturbing it was. And last, but not least, we all thought he would be in the new Smash Brothers (except for me. I definitely was never fooled into thinking that. All right, enough self-promotion), but in the end, Nintendo let the world down.
Ladies and gentleshrooms, peace has finally been restored! All these ups and downs and downs and downs in Waluigi’s history have been building up to this very moment. You see, after nearly two decades, Waluigi has finally been given his own REAL game. Not as a character in a spin-off, not as a side character in a main-series Mario game, but as the star of a full-fledged Waluigi game! I am thrilled to present to you…
|The 'Shroom: Issue 136|
|Staff sections||Staff Notes • The 'Shroom Spotlight • Poll Chairperson Address|
|Features||Fake News • Fun Stuff • Palette Swap • Pipe Plaza • Critic Corner• Strategy Wing|
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