Mario Lore with Shigeru Miyamoto
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- Shigeru Miyamoto explains he is neither: During the events of Donkey Kong Jr. Math, the original Donkey Kong Jr fell into the river due to his inferior knowledge of mathematics, where he was eaten by Snapjaws. Troubled by this turn of event, Cranky adopted the Pink Donkey Kong Jr. as a son and painted him brown to hide what happened from the rest of the Kong clan.
- Miyamoto laughs at the “ludicrous idea” and explains the truth is far simpler: During an unseen chapter of Rosalina’s story, the Cosmic Observatory used the gravitational slingshot of the moon to reach superliminal speed, enough to end up in the alternate universe of Super Mario Bros. The Lost Levels, which is identical to the main series in every way except the cloud and bushes use different sprites. Setlling down in this dimension, Rosalina eventually romanced alternate-universe Luigi and got pregnant, eventually escaping the dimension due to her gambling debt and ending in the past where she gave birth to Mario. Watching over her son’s lifetime from a distance, Rosalina witness Mario fathering Rosalina and jumped back to her original spot in the timeline. As such, Rosalina is simultaneously Mario’s mother and daughter.
- Miyamoto look confusedly at both side and asks “Who’s Daisy?”
Why has Waluigi yet to appear outside spin-off titles?
- Miyamoto explains Waluigi’s lack of appearance is because he is Wario’s imaginary friend and is not real.
Why was the Big Yoshi picture so difficult to find?
- Miyamoto lets out a shocked gasp: the Big Yoshi was originally stored in Nintendo’s artwork archive, but it was soon found prolonged exposure to Big Yoshi had multiple negative effects, including but not to limited to headaches, strong discomfort, vomiting and occasional bouts of psychosis. Mysteriously unable to delete the picture, BigYoshi.png was stored at a remote blacksite in Nevada with orders to shoot all trepassers on sight. Miyamoto then goes on to theorize the reconstruction of Big Yoshi by sleuthing Mario fans is responsible for many of the recent catastrophic events of the current decade.