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“I suppose it would be stupid for me to ask people not to pay attention to what I just typed.”
Pikax, Wiki Chat

Pikaxisms from the Wiki Chat

  • I'm Pikax, yes the real Pikax, all you other Pikaxes are a bunch of Snorlaxes so won't the real Pikax please stand up, please stand up, please stand up!
  • Sometimes, it's hard to tell when someone's joking on the internet.
  • Jump in the cage with the rabid tasmanian devil and you'll be safe.
  • I command you, be unbored!

The Ultimate Showdown - Mario Kart Style

Pikax's Userbox Tower
Pikax signature.PNG
NES Controller.png
PAL version of the Super Nintendo Entertainment System (SNES). Photo by Sandos.
The Wii.
Nintendo 64 logo
The original Nintendo DS, in a silver color
Super Mario Maker costume of Dr. Kawashima from the Brain Age series.
Poké Ball
Poké Ball
Animated coin sprites from Yoshi's Island

The Mario Kart Showdown - contains mild swearing

Ol' Luigi was driving around
Mario Circuit like a big playground
When Suddenly Bowser shot with a yell
And hit Luigi with a big blue shell.
Luigi got p*ssed and began to attack
But didn't expect to be knocked off the track
And then pulled back on by a lakitu,
Then Donkey Kong came out of the blue
And he started beating up the koopa king
With fake pickups among other things
But as soon as he made it up into first place,
Peach and Toad threw bananas in his face
And got a lot of green shells while going out flat:
Blew DK away with a rat-a-tat tat.
Peach had a lead, so it said on the map
As she crossed the line to start the next lap.

This is the ultimate showdown - the Mario Kart Grand Prix.
Fast cars, bob-ombs and explosions as far as the eye can see.
And only one can come first (I wonder who it will be).
This is the ultimate showdown - the Mario Kart Grand Prix.

A blooper covered Donkey Kong in grime
And he hit a banana at a very bad time,
Then Mario came whizzing round the track
With a king shroom boost pushing him from the back
And Yoshi was skidding and trying to get steady
But Bowser had finished lap 2 already
When suddenly something caught his wheel and he slipped.
Toad shot by but his kart then flipped
Then he saw a red shell coming up from behind
And he searched for a star, which he just couldn't find,
But he swerved to the right and the red shell missed
And it hit Luigi who got real p*ssed.
On the very next lap, he pulled away
But Bowser shoved him out of the way.
They fought for first in this race from Hell
'Til they both got hit by another blue shell.

This is the ultimate showdown - the Mario Kart Grand Prix.
Fast cars, bob-ombs and explosions as far as the eye can see.
And only one can come first (I wonder who it will be).
This is the ultimate showdown.

Koopas sang out harmoniously.
Down from above came princess Daisy,
Who delivered a shell, which went like a dart
Into the back of Luigi's kart,
Which flipped up in the air without any grace
As Donkey Kong came back up to first place.
But Daisy didn't want the big ape to win,
So she threw a banana and it made him spin.

Then Shyguy the Red and Shyguy the White
And a big dry bones who could give a fright
And a flying koopa troopa and a hammer brother,
Wario and a goomba and another,
Hooktail, Petey, Mr. L and Boshi,
Count Bleck, Captain Syrup, Birdo and Waluigi,
Bowser Junior, a couple of chain chomps,
Wart, a shroob, Toadsworth and five thwomps
All came out of nowhere lightning fast
And kicked Daisy in her royal ass.
It was the craziest race that the world ever saw
With the audience looking on in total awe.
The race raged on for a minute or three
And was won in the end by Waluigi,
But while he was doing his victory dance,
He was eaten by two blue piranha plants!

That was the ultimate showdown - the Mario Kart Grand Prix.
Fast cars, bob-ombs and explosions as far as the eye can see.
And only one could come first (and it was Waluigi).
That was the ultimate showdown (that was the ultimate showdown),
That was the ultimate showdown (that was the ultimate showdown),
That was the ultimate showdown - the Mario Kart Grand Prix.

Note: No actual bob-ombs were harmed in the making of The Mario Kart Showdown. I am required to say this or the RSPCB (Royal Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Bob-ombs) will be constantly on my tail.

Other music by Pikax

From time to time, I also compose my own pieces, under the alias Bass Invader. Here are some of my works:
Battle of the Highest Order

Pikax's favourite Mario characters

Since everyone and his dog has a list of these, I've decided to make one of my own.

Pikax's Brawling Career

June 28 2008 - Pikax receives Super Smash Bros. Brawl as a gift. He reckons that his main character will be Link.
June 29 2008 - Pikax completes the Subspace Emissary mode and discovers his main character isn't Link, but Meta Knight. He cannot use Fox McCloud or Captain Olimar effectively.
June 30 2008 - Pikax completes the first 28 events and Classic Mode on easy difficulty. He finds Donkey Kong to be a fairly good character to play as.
July 1 2008 - Pikax completes Classic Mode on medium difficulty and finds that he can win a 3-minute brawl against three level 4 opponents, but not three level 5 opponents.
July 2 2008 - Pikax completes some of the first 28 events on medium and hard difficulties, then finds that the going is getting very tough.
July 6 2008 - Pikax's progress in Super Smash Bros. Brawl appears to be coming to a halt.

Support these articles!

Mario Strikers Charged - Thanks to your support, this article has been featured.
Mario Kart (series) - Thanks to your support and a little editing from myself and others, this article has been featured.
Baby Peach - Thanks once again to your support, this article has been featured.
Super Mario 64 - Thanks to your support, this article has been featured.
Smithy - it is not too short.
Dry Bones - Thanks to your support in both the article's nomination and the removal of the oppose vote, this article is featured.

Objections Sustained and Overruled

As a regular Mario Wiki user, I spend most of my time looking at proposals made by other users. Here is an incomplete list of what I have agreed with and what I have objected to:

Character description for non-Mario characters should include details about non-Mario games they appeared in - OBJECTION!
Remove certain "species" from the Species category because they are not of the living - OBJECTION!
New templates for creatures associated with fire and ice - No objections here.
Make the Final Smash article less detailed so that the articles of the actual Final Smashes themselves are not merely repeating the information on the Final Smash page - I did not object to this.
Merge all the Merlons into one article - OBJECTION!
New layout for pages about recurring Mario Kart tracks - I used to object to this, but Mario Gamer did a little fixing up and now I support it.
Increase the height limit for signature images - obviously I'm not going to oppose my own proposal.
Give all of the legendary dogs their own articles - OBJECTION!
Merge Gale Boomerang with Boomerang and Fire Bow with Bow - OBJECTION!

Then I was on holiday for two weeks.

Merge all of the non-Mario related stuff into certain articles - OBJECTION!
Pick a name for the template used for creatures from outer space - I vote for Alien.
Change Rosalina's name to Princess Rosalina - OBJECTION!
Merge the article about the story in Mario Super Sluggers with the main article about the game - I object to the objections.
Merge Mr. L with Luigi - OBJECTION!
Merge Palkia, Dialga and Cresselia - they should be merged with each other, but not the main pokemon article.

Then I took a really long break from Super Mario Wiki to prepare for my A-Levels.