Excess Express waitress

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The title of this article is conjectural; an official name for the article's subject has not been found, so it has been given a fitting title by the editors. If an official name is found, then the article should be moved to its appropriate title.

Excess Express waitress
The Excess Express waitress from Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door.
Species Toad
First appearance Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door (2004)
Excess Express's Dinning Room in the game Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door.
The Excess Express waitress in the dining room
“Welcome, welcome!☆ Today's dinner is the... Mushroom Full Course!☆”
Excess Express waitress, Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door

The Excess Express waitress is a Toad who works on the Excess Express in Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door. She seems to be in love with Zip Toad as she was overjoyed when he boarded the train and hoped he showed up to eat soon. She was also irritated when Pennington accuses him of stealing the pot of stew.

Mario first meets the waitress after boarding the Express Express. During Mario's trip to Poshley Heights in their quest for the Garnet Star, her Shell Earrings are stolen by Doopliss (disguised as Zip Toad). The Shadow Sirens planned to mix the Shell Earrings with Toodles's Gold Ring and some Nitro Honey Syrup to set off an explosion, destroying the train and fulfilling the "sticky, yummy doom" Mario has been warned of. Mario eventually catches the fake Zip Toad, who reluctantly relinquishes the stolen items. If Mario returns the Shell Earrings to the waitress, she will reward him with a Star Piece in gratitude.

The waitress's Shell Earrings were given to her by her ex-boyfriend, apparently an unnamed Squeek Mario can speak to in Podley's Place who wonders if she still keeps them. The waitress often uses star symbols in her text and speaks in a hyperactive, line-by-line sequence. According to Goombella, she probably is not a very good waitress, but likely attracts many men.

On the third day, the waitress gets absorbed into a hoard of Smorgs that attack the train. Mario fends off the Smorgs in the baggage car and free the waitress, along with the train conductor. After Mario defeats the Smorgs, causing them to blow away in the wind, the waitress thanks Mario for saving everybody. She remains aboard the Excess Express for the rest of the game.

After Chapter 6, there is a blue Toad in cabin 1 who reveals he has taken the train countless times, and that the only reason he does that is because he is in love with the waitress and wants to approach her and now has developed a fondness for both the train and her.

Tattle

  • "That's the waitress of the Excess Express. Kinda spacey. Think she's an OK waitress? Probably not... but guys always go for girls like this, don't they? Why is that, Mario?"

Goombella has an alternate tattle for the waitress after Mario rescues her from the Smorgs in the baggage car.

  • "That's the waitress of the Excess Express. I bet she's a little shocked by all this!"

Trivia

  • She is the only Toad with hearts on her cap in Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door. This resembles Vanna T. from Paper Mario.