List of Mario & Luigi: Bowser's Inside Story quotes

This is a list of quotes from Mario & Luigi: Bowser's Inside Story, listed alphabetically, by character.

Birdley

 * "FYI! FYI! FYI! FYI! FYI! FYI!"

Bowser

 * "Nintendo!" (When the game boots up)
 * "Did somebody page the king of awesome?"
 * "PEACH! So I'm an outcast, huh?! What'd I do to deserve this?!"
 * "I've got as much right to be in this meeting as anyone! I mean, right? Help me out here! Toadsworth! Back me up!!"
 * "Well, pardon ME, your royal genius!"
 * "MAAARIO! Are you seriously trying to start with me again?! I hear about this big meeting, and I'm all ready to act nice...But man, the second I see your face, Mr. Nice Bowser is GONE. Yeah, forget your dumb meeting! I'll pummel you and grab Peach!" (Bowser to Mario in the Conference Hall)
 * "CHARGE!" (Before the credits)
 * "Crud!"
 * "HOW DARE YOU!" (Beta version)
 * "Bloooooooorg... I feel all... sloshy."
 * "SHOWTIME!!!" (When the battle starts)
 * "Hey, I know you! You're the weirdo in the forest who gave me that mushroom!"
 * "I'll taste defeat? You're going to be tasting my fist, you little piglet!"
 * "You are not making ANY sense!"
 * "I rule!" (When Bowser successfully gets an "Excellent" in Special Attacks/Leveling Up/Final Battle Win)
 * "A monument, huh? Then that means... I'm the model!"
 * "Shut up! You know me! I AM KING BOWSER!"
 * "WHAT!? My eyes are MUCH more manly than that!"
 * "Filth? CRUST!?"
 * "You can make me better than Mario!?"
 * "Shut up! Don't think I forgot about my castle! Now's when I punt you out of here!"
 * "I fell through the floor, genius!"
 * "Talk about crazy. I GET massages--I don't GIVE 'em!"
 * "What? Lady, what in the world are you talking about?"
 * "Masseur? Are you out of your mind?! Me? Massage YOU?! I don't even know you!"
 * "Of course! But I have no time! Find some other poor sap!"
 * "Pay? That works!"
 * "Hmmmm... This is kinda below my pay grade, but gotta take what I can get..."
 * "Fine, fine, a quick shoulder rub. MAYBE some lumbar. Lie down."
 * "Fine. So what, then?"
 * "The Goombas? Huh. Interesting. Ready for massage duty?"
 * "Great! Broque...whatever! Let's review the terms. My boys will launch an attack on your stiff back, right?"
 * ""She's mine! Put her Back!"
 * ''"One Bowser is plenty, baby! That guy's gotta GO!"
 * "Pfft! Please, who do you think I am? I'm Bowser, the Koopa king!"
 * "Try again in about a hundred years, you weird little babbling nerd!"
 * "Don't lump me with Mario!"
 * "Please! He was so weak, I could hardly call him my enemy!"
 * "MIRACLE MIGHTY POWER / BOWSER SPECIAL AWESOME / IRON BALL RETURN!"
 * "Are you finally ready to stop running and fight?"
 * ''"GWAHAHA! Great dark hurricane! Seriously, perfect backdrop for an awesome final battle! You really sweat the details!"
 * "Listen up! You're saying the kingdom will vanish? NOT TODAY! THIS KINGDOM IS ALL MINE! SO YOU VANISH!"
 * "And for the finale, one KO punch!"
 * "Having yourself some hoedown in my body! MY BODY! I've never been so disgusted! No WAY do I stand for this!"
 * "Hey... you just ACTED like me."
 * "Somebody page me?"
 * "A pox? You're a pox!"
 * "Mario! And Green 'Stache!"
 * "So you two dolts wanna get the Dark Star, huh? AND you're trying to retake Peach's castle?"
 * "No way! Both the Dark Star and Peach's castle should be mine! THEY WILL BE MINE!"
 * "Stupid little pests! Time to get burned!"
 * "Little tickle in the old schnoz... Probably Chippy or something!"
 * "Hmph! Time to get that Star Cure before Mario! Which way to Dimble Wood?"

Bowser Memory ML

 * "Database has been breached by virus of likely malicious origin!"
 * "Data backup complete!"
 * "Launch repulsion program!"
 * "Repel virus! Repel virus! Repel virus! Repel virus! REPEL VIRUS!"
 * "Affirmative. Correct."
 * "I manage the memory banks in this facility."
 * "I have failed to repel you from the area."
 * "But that is no problem. I have switched to a temporary observation protocol instead. Affirmative. Correct."
 * "Affirmative. Correct. I have taken on the form likely to aid communication with you."
 * "It is based on the host's most carefully preserved memory."
 * "Affirmative. The...safe?"
 * "Affirmative. Correct. The safe combination. Danger-avoidance protocols have unilateral failure. Affirmative. Correct."
 * "Negative. Incorrect. The combination is here."

Broque Madame

 * "Oh! Please tell me... a masseur arrives..."
 * "Allo... Hee..."
 * "So zis is sudden, I know, but... Can you get started, cheri?"
 * "Honh? Mon cheri... Surely you are applying... for zee masseur position?"
 * "Honh... Ah, zut alors... I thought... I was sure..."
 * "Heehee... Ah, I must apologize to vous... I am...Broque Madame... Zis is my 'umble abode..."
 * "You see, of late, zee pain has been... tres terrible..."
 * "Zee stress, it savages zee shoulders... and zee back..."
 * "Zat is why... I await... zee professional massage... Hee..."
 * "Ah, mon cheri... You are of zee burly sort... Could you try? Do you... know zee massage arts?"
 * "Ah... I will pay..."
 * "Hee... Zee bait, you take it... You are eager, honh?"
 * "But oui, I will pay vous... I pay with zee finest gear..."
 * "Huh? Hee! I appreciate zee enthusiasm, oui... But zee knots and stiffness are too severe for zat..."
 * "Zee rubbing, it will not work on such awful pain, honh?"
 * "Hmmm..."
 * "Honh? And zis is...?"
 * "Strongest? Ah, oui... Hee... Zat will do nicely..."
 * "So zen... Monsieur Bowser, is it? Zis is what I can call you?"
 * "Hee! So zese powerful soldiers of yours... Zey will be supplying zee massage for moi?"
 * "Heehee... Oui... Tres bien... Make zese soldiers attack as long as zey can..."
 * "Zee kinks, zey have a... mighty hold on my back... Show zem no mercy... Take it to zee limit..."
 * "Ah... Zis is a tragedy... Heehee... Returnez soon..."

Broque Monsieur

 * "Ah, sweet monsieur! 'Elp me! I need 'elp! Helpez-moi, s'il vous plait!"
 * "Hmmm, strange... Zee world, it appers to be upside down..."
 * "Ah! Such a surprise! Monsieur Mario, oui?"
 * "We have met somewhere...Oui? I cannot remember..."
 * "But let us forget about vis...Let us talk about VOUS!"
 * "You are zis famous block collector, I have 'eard!"
 * "Oui, you hit zee blocks and turn zem all brown..."
 * "Zis is madness! You do not feel zee block spirit!"
 * "When you hit zee block, what? Zee values becomes nothing!"
 * "Ow do I make zee profits with zee likes of you around?"
 * "Leave and do not return to moi! Sorry for zee rudeness!"

Chakron

 * "You aspire to travel?"
 * "The mists of consciousness part, and two figures emerge. Why?"
 * "Here, in this place, Chakron meditates on the nature of all. It is Chakron's special place."
 * "And outsiders who disturb the mental peace are not welcome."
 * "You are a very strange being. Popping out of nowhere. Odd."
 * "The universe frowns upon such begging. It scoffs at your wish."
 * "Besides, allow me to enlighten you to something: I am busy. I am afraid you must go."
 * "What am I busy with? Can you not tell? Truly? Look up."
 * "You look at the sky and this pose and still do not know?"
 * "You are unenlightened. That is why you are in a cosmic pickle."
 * "This pose absorbs waves from the deep parts of outer space."
 * "The waves crash upon my mind's shore. I am a mental beach."
 * "With the power of outer space upon me, I can do anything."
 * "Of late, large waves have rolled in, and wisdom surfs upon them."
 * "My brain hangs ten. And how long have I surfed? A thousand years. A thousand."
 * "In truth...I would enjoy that. Meditation does grow tiresome."
 * "But breaking out of my state of perfect balance will be hard."
 * "A thousand-year balance... My body rhythm is like stone."
 * "If you somehow found a way to break such an impenetrable rhythm, the Star Cure...is yours."
 * "No. Do not be childish. Tickling and poking do nothing."
 * "This balance can only be upset by some sort of POW! Some sort of drastic event."
 * "Nothing! I feel nothing! You are truly unenlightened to believe in such antics."
 * 'Nothing! I feel nothing! Not even close. Not a wiggle. Not a single astral shimmy."
 * "Unless you have an attack that shakes the ground, give it up."
 * "Well. Then here shall I remain, immobile."
 * "The wood."
 * "Oh. I said that out loud, didn't I? I suppose that is OK. The attack is in the wood."
 * "There is nothing that outer space knows not. You hear a lot if you listen for a thousand years."
 * "Time for you to perambulate. The wood. Yes. The wood."
 * "Have your minds opened to a ground-shaking attack?"
 * "Shall you try it out?"
 * "This new pose displeases me..."
 * "And gluing all those posts back together will be very tiresome."
 * "And now a thousand-year pose has fallen into the past's vold."
 * "Outer space waves will crash now on an empty mental shore..."
 * "I requested my balance upset, but did not believe. How sad."
 * "But I am already over my saddened state. I am at peace."
 * "No, I do not feel like it now, Leave me at one with the sky."
 * "Yes... I promised. Wait...a moment. I lack...energy..."
 * "I offer this!"
 * "Oh. This new pose pleases me greatly. Waves of energy flow up from the earth to me."
 * "I shall now assume this pose for a hundred years."
 * "Well. If you would leave me to my meditations..."
 * "You travel to Toad Town? That is quite a walk..."
 * "Would it not be easier to fly to Toad Town?"
 * "The power of outer space... I mean, the earth, is mighty."
 * "A short time ago I launched a large, angry being."
 * "Do you dare? Will you try it?"
 * "Very well. Your journey begins by gazing into outer space."
 * "Do not watch me. It is no fun if you know my secret."
 * "Here I go. You go!"

Dark Bowser

 * "Your body, I have copied... Your power, I have copied..."
 * "Not enough... Not enough...power..."
 * "Not enough dark power..."
 * "Power has been drained..."
 * "I am not complete..."
 * "Who... Who will give...the dark power..."
 * "Her..."
 * "No..."
 * "That voice... Yes... I know that voice... That is the being who drained me of my power..."
 * "FWAHAHAHA! Awake at last! The dark power is complete!"
 * "I have copied all that is you. You are no longer necessary."
 * "The dark power slept so long, and now it wakes... It must be freed..."
 * "BEHOLD!"
 * "Still here? Has the dark power not crushed your puny hopes?"
 * "Soon this kingdom will vanish along with all who dwell within. And you, too, will sleep eternally in the dark power's embrace!"

Doctor Toadley

 * ''"Miracle Toadley Cure!"
 * ''"Is it annoying I got wrapped up in all this? Yes it is."
 * "GRAVE ILLNESS!"
 * "Do these men have an incredibly grave illness? Yes. Will there be catastrophic results if we do not cure their ills? There certainly will."
 * "Silence! You men harbor a virus most deadly."
 * "Is it gradually emerging? It most certainly is."
 * "Yes... Do I see it? I do. And did it emerge? It did. A most deadly virus that will spell your doom..."
 * "It is...called... BOWSERITIS!"
 * "Indeed! A virus most vile shows itself at last! And is this the virus that plagues you men? It is. And is it a pox on body and soul? It is."
 * "I must be frank with you. Bowseritis is powerful. Recovering from it takes quite a bit of time."
 * "I'm prescribing ten days' worth of antibiotics. Take these three times a day. With food, preferably."

Fawful

 * "A WINNER IS YOU!"
 * "Jackpotting!"
 * "I HAVE CHORTLES!"
 * "Such easiness! So easy it gives me the gleeful chortles!"
 * "NOW I HAVE FURY!"
 * "I HAVE FAWFUL!"
 * "The winning is for... BOWSERRRR!"
 * "That was a battle of fury!"
 * "I have suction!"
 * "SUPER PEACH CASTLE OF FURY!"
 * "Beef? I am lacking in beef. Fawful is beefless."
 * "It is I who gave the statue nuts!"
 * "Fawful is sitting on the cozy couch, drinking tea that laughs at you!"
 * "Fawfully-Doo! Where Are You!? Fawful be wanting you now!"
 * "I have shock at you!"
 * "You have gotten in Fawful's way at each and every turn... Just like the red and green mustaches that I hate..."
 * "Fawful says farewell to all your fink-rat faces!"
 * "Meet... THE FURY OF FAWFUL!"
 * "I HAVE ANGST!"
 * "I am Lord Fawful! I am ruling the world!"
 * Fawful only got half the power, but I am thinking it is enough to KO you, the king of stupid!"
 * "I have fury?"
 * "Fury?"
 * "You have energy like an angry little battery with no friends!"
 * "MIDBUS! POWER UP!"
 * "Here Fawful goes... The disappearing... Forever disappearing.. WITH YOU! (His last words before he explodes)"
 * "Midbus! Crush this spiky snack, and we will have more chortles!"
 * "I have... DARKNESS!"
 * "Bowser: You're NUTS! Fawful: No hunger for nuts. Just to conquer the kingdom...!"
 * "Fawful: You are like an ugly rabbit that keeps appearing from the hat of a magician that stinks!!"
 * "I have...remorse..."

Kuzzle

 * "Ready for a little puzzlin'? Or do you want to hear this old coot ramble for a tick or two?"
 * "What, now? It sounded like a "no." That's too bad..."
 * "You tot'sve done a jigsaw puzzle before, ain't you?"
 * "You just take all these broken pieces here and stick 'em in the right places."
 * "Get your stylus ready. Touch them pieces with that there stylus."
 * 'While touchin' pieces, move 'em over the puzzle frame."
 * "If the pieces stick to the frame and stay stuck, well, that's their proper home."
 * "That little bottom doohickey rotates pieces whenever you give it a touch. Gotta get them pieces facing the proper way now, tots."
 * "That's how you do a puzzle. Easy, ain't it? You tots get all of that?"
 * "Well, I'm a bit older and more shrivelly now, but I used to be a sage, and a popular one, too!"
 * "Tots today, they just care about their looks, but not ol' Kuzzle! I didn't give a toot about 'em!"
 * "Me, I took pride in usin' the ol' bean to solve me a quiz or a humdinger of a puzzle."
 * ""Wow, excellent job, Kuzzle!", "Absolutely brilliant, Kuzzle!", "You're really hip, Kuzzle!" Oh yep, I was hip all right. I can still picture myself as I was then. Hip. Really hip."
 * "This house was a party pad back then. Luxurious decor, catering, bands, the works. But that were a while ago..."
 * "Anyway, just t'other day... I was enjoyin' me a fine puzzle, as in my custom, when I had me a doozy of a pickle."
 * "I was about to put in the final piece, and at that moment... Yep... At that exact moment... He arrived..."
 * "Oh, you tots know the fella... That big ol' galoot, Bowser... He came in pure angry..."
 * "I tried to have him do a puzzle, but within thirty seconds he got way too peeved! He said... "I DON'T GET IT!""
 * "So he started raisin' him a ruckus and messed up all the furniture in the room. On top of that, the galoot ran off with the Star Cure, which is a sage's charge."
 * "Oh, it's a tough ol' tale, yep. That big galoot was actin' like a big ol' baby... And ever since then, well, ain't nothing much has gone on around here."
 * "I mean, if he stormed in here again, there ain't exactly anything to steal..."
 * "And that's the tale, tots. Now this ol' coot would like to enjoy a peaceful puzzle. Anytime you're lookin' to do the same, you come by and visit old Kuzzle..."

Luigi

 * "Nintendo!"
 * "Yah!"
 * "Mama mia."
 * "Oh yeah."
 * "Okay."
 * "Okey-dokey!"
 * "Mario!"

Mario

 * "Nintendo!"
 * "Yah!"
 * "No!"
 * "Mama mia."
 * "Let's-a go!"
 * "Oh yeah!"
 * "Woo-hoo!"
 * "Luigi!"

Midbus

 * "You. You no longer needed. You taste defeat."
 * "Taste your fist? Ha ha.  I think not.  I HAVE NO TASTE!"
 * "Sense is for the weak!"
 * "NOW YOU SLEEP!"
 * ''"SUPER ULTRA WONDER ULTIMATE RUTHLESS GREAT IRON BALL!"
 * "Here your long journey ends!"
 * "Then you will lose! And you will cry!"
 * "MUH MUH MUH!"
 * "He is of trash. And you are. You, trash. I call you trash."
 * "Go be trashy in this trash hole with this trash robot forever!"
 * "Go! Super Ultra Great Mega Trashy Monster Junker Bot!"
 * "What? Nobody pressed dance! You are broken!"

Mother Toad

 * "Well, hi there, sweetie! Home early today, huh?"
 * "You naughty little scamp!"
 * "You'll never grow up into a fine Toad with such bad behavior!"
 * "Yes, dear, it is."
 * "But call your dad before we eat."
 * "What is it, dear?!"
 * "NOOO! HONEY!"

Peach

 * "Both of you...calm down."

Starlow

 * "PARDON ME!"
 * "Sorry I'm late! This castle's huge!"
 * "Nice to meet you! I'm Starlow!"
 * "Peach sent word of trouble in the Mushroom Kingdom..."
 * "So, as a representative of the Star Sprites, here I am!"
 * "HELLO YELLO!"
 * "Oh... Uh... Well..."
 * "Well, I did some research on similar afflictions, but..."
 * "The blorbs is in a class of its own. It seems to be incurable..."
 * "If we could just find a cause, we'd have a place to start..."
 * "Psst... Who is that over there?"
 * "Dr. Toadley?"
 * "Hmm..."
 * "Take a look at Special Attacks, and practice or watch demos."
 * "Use items you've found, and inspect important things in your inventory."
 * "Have a look at your gear, and outfit yourself for battle."
 * "Check out all the information about your characters."
 * "Find your location on the map."
 * "Read about and change badges."
 * "My name...? It's... Chippy!"
 * "Yup. Your minion."
 * "You defeated them when you were babies?"
 * "Wow. Only you could do that, Mario!"
 * "What's that? Luigi fought bravely as well?"
 * "Hee hee! Did you attack them with some ferocious crying?"
 * "Aw, it got away!"
 * "There's gotta be a way past this barrier... But it's beyond us now."
 * "Until Dr. Toadley finds out the location of the other sages, we should stick around this area."
 * "There's no way Bowser can get the Star Cure first anyway..."
 * "WAIT! You're the first sage, right? We need to talk to you! WAIT!"
 * "Mario! Luigi! Get it together! Follow that bug!"
 * "Please! Your...Sageness!"
 * "Please give us the Star Cure so we can stop the Dark Star!"
 * "Whew! Finally! We got one of the Star Cures..."
 * "Let's get out of here, what do you say?"
 * "We didn't mean to disturb you. We heard you have a Star Cure and we really need it!"
 * "If we don't get all three Star Cures, the kingdom is doomed!"
 * "There's just one left! We need to find it at any cost!"
 * "A thousand years?! Why don't you take a break already?! Everyone needs breaks!"
 * "A ground-shaking attack... Where would we find an attack like that, I wonder..."
 * "How do you know?"
 * "Hey! Hand it over!"
 * "ARE YOU CRAZY?! YOU'RE A SAGE! You have to keep your promise to us!"
 * "OK! We have all three of the Star Cures!"
 * "Let's race to Dr. Toadley's in Toad Town! Thanks, Mr. Chakron!"
 * "You can do that?"
 * "YELLO GOODBYE!"

Toadbert

 * "By boogity!"

Toadsworth

 * "Oh! How absolutely wretched..."
 * "Such a thing has never happened in the history of the Kingdom!"
 * "Princess! We still await..."
 * "Ah, glorius! I daresay our Star Sprite has arrived!"
 * "Princess... This thing is... what?"
 * "Mercy! Such pep! Such verve! Such unswerving confidence!"
 * "So you'll be able to simply cure the blorbs, then! Correct?"
 * "Hrm... If this is even beyond the power of a Shine Sprite..."

Toad Nurse

 * "The medical staff did what we could to ease the swelling..."
 * "Thanks for the news flash! Obviously we want to help!"
 * "Well, I ave many patients, so you'll have to excuse me."
 * "OK! Next patient!"
 * "But as far as we can tell, we can't reverse the effects..."
 * "Oh, what's this? Luigi and Mario! Is something ailing you today?"
 * "The doctor can only see one patient at a time. I'm afraid you'll have to come in one by one."
 * "What? You want to consult the doctor at the same time? We really shouldn't... For that, you really need an appointment... If you don't mind me asking, what ails you, Mario?"
 * "Your mustache has a fine sheen... You seem quite healthy. And Luigi seems to be jumping with vigor..."
 * "Sore throat! That could be an early symptom of the blorbs!"
 * "No! Chest pains! This is an emergency! If you two get blorbed, the kingdom's doomed!"
 * "You two must see the doctor immediately! Come with me!"
 * "Doctor, your next patients are here. Uh... Doctor?"
 * "This crystal imaging is how the doctor diagnoses patients. Watch carefully."

Wisdurm

 * "ENOUGH!"
 * "Persistent men, aren't youuu?"
 * "What is it you want with meee?"
 * "Hmm? The Dark Staaaar? Princess Peach captuuured? Mushroom Kingdom overrunnn?"
 * "Ahhhh... Traaaagic. Truly traaaagic. My sympathiesss."
 * "You want me, a sage, to give you, a nobody, the Star Cuure?"
 * "I don't know about thaaat..."
 * "What physical proof do you have that your story is truuuue? Why should I believe youuuu?"
 * "This Star Cure was entrusted to the sole care of me, Wisdurm!"
 * "Why would I hand it over to men who lack any credibiiiiility?!"
 * "Hmmmmmmmm... You're quite persistennnt. This troubles meeeee."
 * "You chase me without flaaagging. You demand the Star Cuuuure..."
 * "Rather brazen, methiiiiiiinks..."
 * "Tut tut! Lost our temperrrrr? Somewhat childish, nooooo? And yet amuuusing! Regrettably..."
 * "Very wellll... If you are so insistent that I give you the cure, we will battle for iiiiit."
 * "A battle with Wisdurrrrrm... The winner will own the Star Cuuuuuure."
 * "Yes? Then we beginnnnn."
 * "Wisdurm battle sequence STAAAAAAAAAAART!"
 * "Guh... Bluh... Gack... Haff..."
 * "Heh heh heh heh..."
 * "So you have bested me on the field of baaaaattle."
 * "That victory has earned you the right to see me in my true forrrrrrm."
 * "Wellll? Not too bad looking, hmmmm? Heh heh heh heh..."
 * "Now thennnn... I am one of the guardians of the Star Cuuures."
 * "We sages knew the day of the Dark Star awakening would come, and so awaited the heeeeroes..."
 * "We have met many times, as you two well rememberrrr..."
 * "The day Bowser ate me along with the giga-carrot was the day our fates crosssssed... Heh heh heh heh..."
 * "It is clear that we are connected by a fate that is beyond our poor comprehensionnnn..."
 * "Of coursssssse... Here, take iiiit."
 * "And so my role here comes to an ennnnnd..."
 * "Now, please stop following me around. It's creeeeepy..."
 * "I wish you luck finding the other two Star Cuuuuures..."
 * "Flapflapflap..."

Yikk

 * "Who has awakened me from my eternal slumber?"
 * "Master Creator. Bonded genius. Inventor of the Tower of Yikk."
 * "My soul slumbers in this book, my entire existence distilled into a patchwork of dreams..."
 * "I am tormented by the riddle of the Boo."