The 'Shroom:Issue XXXIV/Fake News

Fake News

Director's Notes
by Happy New Year, readers! Before we get on with our Fake News, I have some real announcements. First, we have some changes to our staff. now writes Fake Characters and will be joined by next month,  now writes Fake Music, and  now writes Fake Shop. We also bid a fond farewell to, , , and , and we hope they return to The 'Shroom sometime in the future.

Interview List
The Fake TV, Fake Games, Fake Police Blotter, and Fake Weather positions are now open, sign up for an interview below in the format in one of the spaces provided below, or add a space for yourself if all the spots are filled.



Now, on with the fun!

Travel Guide
by

Visit the Valley of Bowser! We're not just about the castles and the lava and the doom, we've got some jumping, some moving platforms, ghosts, and caves! Our valley is unlike any other Bowser area because we've even got a kids area! Come visit today! Take a day trip, or stay for a whole weekend!

Fake Music
by

Today's Top 5 Hit songs are from many bands, so here they are:
 * 1) 'Shroom Whatcha say - The T. Rockers
 * 2) Boorella - Booband
 * 3) Don't Upset the Weegee now - The LuigisBand
 * 4) Peach Girl - The Peach Lovers
 * 5) Left my Heart in Luigi's Hands - The Band of Daisy

Cooking Guide
by

Welcome to this month's Cooking Guide. This time around, we won't have any special guest, so just your host.

Today I will show you have to make the delicious snack time treat, Yoshi Cookie!

Instead of the usual way, I will show you a better, more scrumptious way to make the cookie. But first, you need the following:


 * A Yoshi Egg
 * A bag of Cake Mix
 * 1/2 Pound of fruit
 * Mixing Bowl and a spoon
 * Yoshi Head Cookie Cutter
 * Flat oven pan and parchment paper
 * An oven (pre-heated to 375 degrees Fahrenheit)
 * Frosting


 * 1) Steal a Yoshi Egg from their village on the hot island (make sure they don't see you).
 * 2) Find a Yellow Shy Guy in the playroom, and jump him until he gives you the cake mix.
 * 3) Buy some fruit, preferrably Melons.
 * 4) Take to a kitchen, and throw the ingredients into the mixing bowl.
 * 5) Stir with spoon until creamy, which should be around 8 minutes.
 * 6) Pour batter on parchment-covered pan, and use cookie cutter to make it look professional (Dispose/consume extra batter).
 * 7) Put in oven for approximately 10.5 minutes, or until a golden brown.
 * 8) Take out, and once cool, use frosting of choice to make a Yoshi face.
 * 9) If done correctly, you will have a nice snack for any occasion, just make sure you never tell a Yoshi what you used...

Ads
by



Do you have that stupid friend who hates the presents that you give them at birthday parties? Are you having trouble deciding what to get your annoying family members for Christmas? Do you...What do you mean Christmas passed? SHUT UP!

Introducing the Question Block. This block is full of mystery...ooooooooohh.

Open it up and you could receive a million bucks or you could receive a pile of crap. The box is [s]rigged[/s] always random and filled with explosives random stuff. It could be something pleasant or it could be something crappy. If you're un lucky, it could be something deadly!

Fake Interview
by

Hello all Users and 'Shroomers, this is your interviewer Baby Mario Bloops with your Fake Interview of the month. Today, I'm going to interview Luigi! With never left, let's us begin! Baby Mario Bloops: Luigi, let me start will how was your latest adventure?

Luigi: It-a okay, now that me brother, Mario saved the Princess again.

Baby Mario Bloops: I hear a hint of anger, are you jealous?

Luigi: What's make say-a that? Of course I am! He's the one that's always the center of attention!

Baby Mario Bloops: That's true, but your a main character in the Mario series!

Luigi: Yes, but I'm-a always second compared to Mario!

Baby Mario Bloops: You stared in many games as equal as Mario, especially in the your guy's series.

Luigi: It wasn't bad, but did you see how-a many times they didn't know my name? How I was always being laughed at? How everyone still cared about only Mario?

Baby Mario Bloops: ...Okay, lets not use that reference. How about Luigi's Mansion? You had to save Mario, and it was all about you.

Luigi: That was a horrible experience, and I never want-a go through that again. I-a only save Mario because he had to pay the house rent.

Baby Mario Bloops: And here I though you two got along just perfectly. Your brothers, you suppose to hate each other, but not like how your stating it.

Luigi: Ha! We were-a forced to because Shigeru Miyamoto made rules that we are not allowed to show any kind of hatred in the Mario games...

Baby Mario Bloops: Sorry to interrupt, but isn't one rule involve not breaking the fourth wall?

Luigi: Yes, that is the important rul--Uh oh. I got-a go, thanks for the interview, and see you in the next Mario game, maybe not Super Mario Galaxy 2, but....(gone before he can finish his statement)

Baby Mario Bloops: No! Now we have to wait for a few month before we can learn what he was about to tell us about. Anyways, that wraps up another interesting interview. See you next month, and enjoy the rest of the Fake News!!!

Fake Sports
by

On January 2nd, Waluigi Stadium was abuzz. However, it wasn't the revving up of car engines, or the screams of brawlers. It was the bouncing and shooting of basketballs! Team Waluigi and Team Yoshi faced off in an all-out, no-holds-barred outdoor showdown, and the visitng Team Yoshi emerged victorious, 75-69. The game followed a smooth back-and-forth tempo, and Yoshi led all scorers with 21 points, including a pair of late three-pointers to seal the deal. The teams face off again on the 21st at Yoshi Arena.

Fake Characters
by

Hey kids! Are you sick of all the old characters? It gets boring with just the same old characters. Well turn that frown upside down because in the new game, Super Mario Moonlight, (named to be the anti game of Super Mario Sunshine) will have a wide variety of new characters. Some of these characters include: Shadow Luigi, Shadow Wario, Shadow Princess Shroob, Papa Wario (Wario's Father), and even Mini Bowser! This is very exciting that new characters can now be introduced to the the Mario games. This game comes out in 2016!

Fake Shop
by

Mushroom: 25 coins, Smash!!!It would Make you big and also break bricked blocks.

Fire Flower: 75 coins, Time to burn people!!! Gives the ability to throw fireballs.

Koopa Shell: 100 coins, Time for pay back!!! Throw the Koopa shell at enemies to kick them off the platform!