The 'Shroom:Issue XXXII/Fake News

Fake News

Director's Notes
by

As you can see, we have a couple of open positions. However, you can't just sign up anymore. Recently, we've had a lot of unqualified users sign up, and they've done a crappy job. You will have to add yourself to the interview list, which is below here, and I, along with the other leaders of The 'Shroom, will find the most qualified user(s) for the job(s).

Interview List
WARNING: If you don't add yourself in the format, you will be automatically disqualified. As for now, I've made ten slots; if there are more than users wishing to sign up, please add a spot for yourself.



Travel Guide
by

I have decided to open up the Travel Guide position to you, the users of the MarioWiki. However, you have to interview to get the job. If nobody is qualified enough to take the job, I'll continue writing it.

Fake TV/Movies
by

Dr. Mario M.D. It's now in theaters, and it's about to become a hit TV series! It's a show starring Mario about him as a doctor in the in. Here, he and its equip, formed by a nice female Koopa, a black Goomba, and a Toad, solve medical problems here Mario acts like a jerk to everyone. Initially, Mario had a problem with his right hand, which he treated with Mushrooms, but he became addicted to The 'Shrooms. He also regularly encounters problems caused by the Koopalings. The following is a dialogue from an upcoming episode: Black Goomba: We have a Toad who can't feel his feet. In addition, his spots on his head are now purple! Mario: Wow, you don't know what to do? Give him three pills that are the color his spots used to be, dumb****. Toad: Wow, you're a genius. Mario: No ****.



Wanted Poster
by



Fake Police Botter
by


 * Mario was injured in his new adventure . He got injured by Bowser Jr. who blast a Bom-omb in his head. He was in hospital for a week.
 * Blue Toad has been arrested for stamping on Luigi’s head in an attempt to steal Luigi's Mushroom.

Cooking Guide
by

I have decided to open up the Cooking Guide position to you, the users of the MarioWiki. However, you have to interview to get the job. If nobody is qualified enough to take the job, I'll continue writing it.

Fake Ads
by

Toto flaked and decided to quit/be fired/leave on mutual agreement. If you want to become the new Ad Salesman, you must sign up for an interview!

Fake Poll
by

 Who is funnier? ">

Fake Ads
by

7727 decided to resign. If you want to become the new Interviewer, you must sign up for an interview

Fake Sports
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 * During the Mushroom Kingdom Soccer Cup, the final four teams have made it through. Team Shy Guy, Team Wario, Team Pianta and Team Waluigi. And Wario and Waluigi were set to face off when it was revealed Wario and the rest of his team were taking steroids and were banned from the comp, which put Waluigi through to the grand final. But who will he face. Shy Guy or Pianta. Its half time in this game and its 2-1, Pianta's way
 * Mario has announced his retirement from baseball. This comes after pressure from the media after his drunken brawls with Pokey, Roy Koopa and Chain Chomp (He broke one of Chain Chomp's teeth and was about to break another but was pulled off by Bowser. Jr
 * Birdo has broken her back in Moto Racing after crashing into a fence, with 6 other people. One of them being Toadsworth who has broken her shoulder and getting a concussion. The owner of the course, Toad, said it wasn't the safest tracks, but i believe it could've been avoided by the riders. He also believes in giving Birdofreak99 the fake sports

Fake Weather
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 * MON:[[Image:Sun.gif]]
 * TUE:[[Image:Sun.gif]]
 * WED:[[Image:Sun.gif]]
 * THU:[[Image:Sun.gif]]
 * FRI:[[Image:Sun and Cloud.gif]]
 * SAT:[[Image:Rain and Black Cloud.gif]]
 * SUN:[[Image:Sun and Cloud.gif]]

Fake Shop
by

Well, Bowser took over the shop, and he wanted to tell his customers, "BWAHAHAHA! I stole this from my friend!  Buy or die! My second product is a item that makes you...well... ME!!!!!!!!!! It gives you fire-breath and the ability to beat me! Well, my Bob-omb just caught on fire, so... BYE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

User Brawl
by (with help from Baby Mario Bloops)

Welcome to the third and latest installment of..... USER BRAWL!!!!!!!!!!!!

Today lucky Users will be:

Monteyaga vs. FunkyK38  vs. Cmario17  vs. Crackin355

Fighting in a limited 3-stock battle to the death with no items, except for the smash ball that only appears at medium level of times. The four brawlers will brawl it out on the frightful stage, known to many users as... Luigi's Mansion!



Let us get some information from each one of these fighters' bios...

Monteyaga: Monteyaga may be weak but he is EXTREMLY fast. Watch out for the moles he summons or you will have pain coming to you. You better watch out for his head butt or you will go flying! he is small but Intelligent... Watch out for his umbrella that he uses for a weapon (like a rapier!)! Overall he is small but fast!

FunkyK38: It's not Rosalina; it's the next best thing. FunkyK's got lightning fast moves and a strong partner to get her out of any jams she gets in.

Cmario17: Cmario17 is a Super Mario Wiki user. He’s usually very friendly, unless you have to fight him. He is a powerful fighter, and can call a Yoshi in aid him in battle, increasing his speed and power. Watch out for his Final Smash: he will create many Pill Pals, and everyone is bound to get hurt by several of them – just because there are SO MANY!

Crackin355: A Boy that fell through his computer and turned into a Knuckles look-alike. He is speedy, smart and doesn’t back down from a fight (Usually). He uses his Wiimote and DS during battle and his dogs are so loyal to help as well!

Brawler’s stats:

The Music:

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The Brawl:

And here comes the brawlers, on the top-right of the stage a small hill is coming out of the ground and then pops out Monteyaga, on the bottom-right, a tornado of stars just appeared, there now gone and FunkyK38 appears, on the top-right of the stage, is that a Yoshi running into the battle field, well of course since Yoshi is carrying Cmario17, is Cmario17 feeding Yoshi a yoshi cookie, that's also right just to be kind to his pet, then Yoshi goes away, on the bottom-right of the stage, Crackin355 just jump off a trampoline and... OOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!! He just landed on his head, but he is OK.

3...... 2...... 1....... GO!! and there off, Cmario17 runs to where Crackin355 is at and they’re now at fist to fist, beating up each other good, but FunkyK38 runs in and use Star Swirl (standard) and they are both given a hefty amount of damage. FunkyK38 turns around and uses Star Bow (down) on Monteyaga who tried to sneak attack behind her, but he receive damage, but not enough so he is still going on a head on collision, when he just got close enough Crackinn355 uses DS Throwsion (side) and it's a black one, BBBOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM, a large explosion just happened, so large it damages every player and sends Monteyaga really far and it caused the top right pillared to collapsed. As everybody recovers from the explosion a smash ball appears, Monteyaga comes in and uses Drill Drive (standard), but it's not enough and FunkyK38 uses Luma Toss (side) and it's a green luma, so Monteyaga is sent almost to the side boundary line but he recovers and uses Umbrella (up) to get back onto the stage. FunkyK38 uses Luma Toss again on the smash ball and it's a cream [colored] luma (strongest), but Cmario17 jumps in the way and is launched into a head on collision with Monteyaga which breaks his launch to the boundary line to a KO. As FunkyK38 was about to use another attack on the smash ball, the smash ball changed direction and Crackin355 uses Wiimote Throw (standard) which breaks the smash ball. Crackin355 now activates his final smash, Space Invaders, the space invaders are flying in and manage to grab FunkyK38 and Monteyaga but Cmario17 luckily dodged the space invader and got back on stage by using Coin Attack Jump (up), now Crackin355 jumps onto his space ship and is now shooting FunkyK38 and Monteyaga over and over and over again, the final smash is over and the both of them are launched into their first KO.

Crackin355 does a taunt but Cmario17 now uses Ride Yoshi (down) and uses Single-Yoshi Stampede (Yoshi's side) into a head on collision with Crackin355, and he is launched high, when he comes back down he uses Doggy Charge (down) but Cmario17 side-stepped and he uses Fireball (side) on Crackin355. Now they’re throwing punches at each other, but are stopped by Crackin355 who uses Wiimote Throw and it's the nunchuk, but Cmario17 uses Use Barry (standard) and it is reflected back to Crackin355 which costs him his first KO. As Cmario17 is doing a taunt Monteyaga all of a sudden jumps in and uses Headbutt on him, which launches him, then FunkyK38 uses Star Bow and it’s a direct hit, now FunkyK38 uses Teamwork (up) and Funky Kong threw him up and then she uses a powerful aerial attack which KOs Cmario17. As Monteyaga watches, Crackin355 sneaks up from behind and uses Doggy Charge on him, then Monteyaga uses Claw Furry (side), but Crackin355 uses Trampolino (up) to escape his attack, Claw Furry caused the top-left pillared to collapse. The smash ball appeared again, Crackin355 jumps after it but Monteyaga footstool jumps him and he uses Headbutt, but that doesn't break it, as he jumps after it again and about to attack it Crackin355 jumps for it but Cmario17 uses Tongue Attack (Yoshi's standard) on Crackin355 and spits him out on the other direction, as Cmario17 uses Egg Throw (Yoshi's up) on the smash ball, the Star Bow hits the smash ball before Egg Throw and breaks it, FunkyK38 now has the smash ball, FunkyK38 then runs up to Cmario17 and uses a smash attack which causes Cmario17 to fall off Yoshi then Monteyaga comes and uses Headbutt, then FunkyK38 uses Luma Toss and it's a cream luma launching Cmario17 to his second KO. FunkyK38 now uses Comet Tornado (final smash), a gigantic fire blue tornado just appeared violently jerking back and forth on the stage breaking the last two pillars on the mansion, the final smash lasted for a few seconds now it finally ended KO the other two brawlers.

As FunkyK38 taunts Cmario17 runs up while on Yoshi and uses Tongue Attack then spits her out and then uses Single-Yoshi Stampede launching her high into the air the Cmario17 Dismount (Yoshi's down) off yoshi and then uses Coin Attack Jump on FunkyK38 landing her to a KO. As Cmario17 descends down Crackin355 uses Trampolino and uses an aerial attack on him then Cmario17 starts abusing the Fireball attack and it's hitting Crackin355 and Monteyaga a lot of times. When Crackin355 hits the ground Monteyaga uses Drill Drive on him and then uses an aerial attack, then he sees a Star Bow racing towards him, he turns around but slips, as he sees it coming towards him the Mansion fixes itself causing the bow to slam into a pillar. Monteyaga then gets up and uses Claw Furry on FunkyK38 then FunkyK38 uses Luma Toss and it’s a black luma, it hits Monteyaga and launches him not too far. The smash ball now appears, Monteyaga uses Headbutt, but FunkyK38 hits the smash ball with Star Bow at full power, but it didn't break it yet, but when Monteyaga does Headbutt it breaks it. Monteyaga then frantically uses Monty Mole Summon (final smash) as everybody runs towards him, the monty moles are coming out of everywhere, there is a lot of them, pushing and damaging all opponents, but all of the opponents used their recovery move but Cmario17 hits the floor first and he is pushed of the edge, he quickly gets on Yoshi and jumps then uses Tongue Attack to grab the ledge, he stays there as Yoshi falls down, but he stays there too long and now the monty moles pull him down to the lower boundary line, Cmario17........ DEFEATED!

The final smash has now ended, When both of the brawlers recover from that barrage FunkyK38 runs up to Crackin355 and uses Star Swirl then she uses Luma Toss and its a red luma, launching Crackin355 high into the air, the she uses Teamwork and before she can land another attack Crackin355 uses Doggy Charge, launching her far. When she's about to get back on ground she uses a backwards aerial attack on Monteyaga then she follows him and does a downwards aerial attack launching him down but he uses Umbrella but before he can grab the ledge FunkyK38 used Teamwork and edge-hog the ledge causeing Monteyaga to slowly descend to his KO, Monteyaga...... DEFEATED!

Now it's down to FunkyK38 versus Crackin355, Crackin355 uses DS Throwsion and after uses Wiimote Throw, both are which a black DS and a nunchuk respectively, FunkyK38 uses Star Bow to intercept the black DS causing to blow up and destroying the nunchuk in the process, waiting for the debris to clear up FunkyK38 runs out of the smoke and uses Star Swirl but Crackin355 roles behind her but FunkyK38 changes direction causing him to be caught in it then he is launched upwards, as he is about to use her up attack to end the battle Crackin355 uses Trampolino hitting FunkyK38 launching her off the edge but she gets back on with Teamwork, as she goes after Crackin355 in mid-air she is interrupted by the Mansion which fixes itself again, and Crackin355 uses Wiimote Throw but it's just a Wiimote not doing too much damage when it hits FunkyK38, she then recovers and uses Luma Toss and it's the cream luma, as she watches the cream luma going into a head on collision Crackin355 quickly with correct timing roles behind it, but that is what FunkyK38 was hoping for as she uses a side smash attack on Crackin355, BBBAAAAMMMMMMMM, sending Crackin355 to his final KO, Crackin355..... DEFEATED! .... GAME!!

Victory:

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The winner is........... FUNKYK38!!

FunkyK38 sits on Funky Kong's shoulder and salutes the audience.

Results:

1st: FunkyK38

2nd:Crackin355

3rd: Monteyaga

4th: Cmario17