List of Mario & Luigi: Bowser's Inside Story quotes

This is a list of quotes from the game Mario & Luigi: Bowser's Inside Story.

Bowser

 * "Nintendo!" (Also said by Mario and Luigi)
 * "Did somebody page the king of awesome?"
 * "Gee, PARDON ME! Guess what? I live here, Your Royal Genius! I've got as much right to be in this meeting as anyone! I mean, right? Help me out here! Toadsworth! Back me up!"
 * "MAAARIO! Are you seriously trying to start with me again?! I hear about this big meeting, and I'm all ready to act nice... But man, the second I see your face, Mr. Nice Bowser is GONE. Yeah, forget your dumb meeting! I'll pummel you and grab Peach!"
 * ''"Gee, well pardon ME, Your Royal Genius!"
 * "Taste defeat? You're going to taste my fist, you little piglet!"
 * "SHOWTIME!"
 * "TOO MANY WORDS."
 * "Marching straight ahead into the enemy's feet!' Didn't you all learn that in Goomba boot camp?"
 * "You like compost? I'll compost your face!"
 * "A pox? You're a pox!"
 * "I'll build a bridge or something! BECAUSE I GET THINGS DONE."
 * "Kidnapping Peach? Oh, that is so completely my move!"
 * "GWAHAHA! You figure out who's tougher yet, Mr. Ice Cube?"
 * "It felt good, punching out that weirdo!"
 * "Now, I'll help myself to the Dark Star and the world!"
 * "Like that's my problem! I'm done with you, pal!"
 * "Please! Try again in about a hundred years, you weird little babbling nerd!"
 * "Don't lump me with Mario!"
 * "GWAHAHA! Great dark hurricane! Seriously, perfect backdrop for an awesome final battle! You really sweat the details! Listen up! You're saying the kingdom will vanish? NOT TODAY! THIS KINGDOM IS ALL MINE! SO YOU VANISH!"
 * "What's the matter with you? Your color is...weird! But, whatever. I'm still gonna win this fight, no prob! And for the finale, one KO punch! HERE I GO!"
 * "Hey... You just ACTED like me. That doesn't mean you ARE me. You're no match for the real deal, original Bowser..."
 * "Right... You...LOST."
 * "Yeah. Pretty tough dude, all around."
 * "Oh yeah! I forgot! Now I can kidnap her!"
 * "Gowch! Hurts... Really hurts! NGGWAAARF!"
 * "What. What in the... WHAT IS THIS?! WHY DID GREEN 'STACHE AND MARIO COME OUT OF MY GUT?!"
 * "Wait... YOU! That voice... CHIPPY!? You're telling me YOU'RE Chippy?!"
 * "GRAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!"
 * "Having yourself a hoedown in my body! MY BODY! I have never been so disgusted! NO WAY do I stand for this! So, THIS time, I'm taking your precious princess! CHARGE!!!"

Bowser Memory ML

 * "REPEL VIRUS!"
 * "Affirmative. Correct."

Broque Madame

 * "Oh! Please tell me... a masseur arrives..."

Broque Monsieur

 * "Ah! Allô over zere! Monsieur Turtle Bits!"
 * "Ah, sweet monsieur! 'Elp me! I need 'elp! Helpez-moi, s'il vous plaît!"
 * "Ah! Bonjour!"
 * "Non! I am too rude! I am Broque Monsieur!"
 * "I was cleaning zee collection, but... Disaster, it struck moi! Zee bridge to zee beach, it fell into zee water!"
 * "Monsieur! You 'ave zee odor of a gentleman! Ah, oui! It wafts! And a gentleman 'elps zee needy! Surely you 'ave zis credo, oui?"
 * "STOP, I AM BEGGING YOU! Good monsieur Turtle Bits! You who I am not smelling!"
 * "But 'ow can you say zis thing? You 'ave very much to gain! I will give you zee gratitudes!"
 * "Ah! Your interest, it piques? Zis is wonderful! Marvelous! Oui, a hot block spirit dwells in you, Monsieur Turtle Bits! A blazing, fiery block spirit... Oui. You 'ave zee power..."
 * "Look upon zis. How is zis for gratitudes, honh? I give you zis glorious thing!"
 * "Zee hot block spirit cries out from your belly, and it cries for zis block! It is born for you!"
 * "Your tongue, bit upon it!"
 * "Zis block is magnifique! Do not utter one ill word to zis block! Zee block collectors, zey pay one million coins for zis, honh? It is so very rare, oui! You will know zis if you hit it! Oui, you will be in for zee big surprises, Monsieur Turtle Bits!"
 * "Ah! Thank you! Merci! You are a gentleman, après all!"
 * "Zis petit island, it is floating in zee ocean. A surprise to you, non? You see zis rope on zee beach? If you are to pull on zis, you will movez zee entire island!"
 * "Hmmmm, strange... Zis world, it appears to be upside down..."
 * "You 'elped me, and for zis I salute you!"
 * "Such a fine block! We sing the song of block!"
 * "Pour vous!"
 * "Non! Zat LOOKS like a normal block! Zat is what is so devious about my little block. So devious! Zis is actually a Vacuum Block. You hit zis block, and you inhale whatever lies before you! Say you use zis in battle, honh? Ah! What is zis?! You inhale zee enemy with bravado! Très bien!"
 * "Come, let us try zis out!"
 * "You will submit to zee power of zis magnificent block, and you will do so NOW!"
 * "We begin right zis second! Zis is showtime, oui!"
 * "Now, if you use zat Vacuum Block, you inhale zee small monsters! Oui, when you attempt to inhale, zee Vacuum Block reacts so very intensely!"
 * "It... it is... INCROYABLE! Oui, zis is zee power of zee amazing Vacuum Block!"
 * "Press zee over and over and inhale moi!"
 * "MAGNIFIQUE!"
 * "Zut alors, zis is a surprise! Messieurs inside zee monsieur... How are you, honh?"
 * "I cannot pass zee time, for I am training zee big monsieur about zee block tricks, oui? Allow moi to go back outside. Do not bother, s’il vous plaît!"
 * "Monsieur Turtle Bits, you inhale like zee tornado... What a vacuum..."
 * "Zis unbelievable, surprising thing that brings smiles to zee world is called a Retry Clock!"
 * "If you have a Retry Clock when your HP reaches 0 in battle... Time rolls back to zee battle's start! It is, how you say? ZEE DO-OVER!"
 * "Zat is très bien, oui? But zere is only a limited number of zee Retry Clocks, so do not use zem too much! Oui, plan your usage of zem very carefully, s’il vous plaît. Keep zat one as zee souvenier."
 * "Your block tricks are almost parfait, honh? Let us continue! UN! DEUX! TROIS!"
 * "STOP! PARFAIT! You have zee mastery of zee block tricks, oui. Zis battle is OVER!"
 * "Ah, how was zis? Nice, honh? Zee magnificent Vacuum Block! Zee color! Zee gloss! Zee feel! We are not worthy of zis block! Who dares say zis is not so? And you, Monsieur Turtle Bits, you became a block collector after seeing zis block, oui?"
 * "Alors, let us meet again, honh? Until zen, good-byes to you!"
 * "Why is poor moi here, he asks... Well... I have zee troubles. My petit pet block, he is lost to moi..."
 * "ALLOOOOOOO! MON CUTE BROGGY! COME BACK TO MOI! I AM MISSING YOU!"
 * "MON CHERÍ! Petit Broggy! You returnez! Come to moi, honh? Give us zee petite hug you like so well!"
 * "Oh! Crazy Broggy! Why do you do zis?"
 * I can do nothing when he is like zis. Could you teach him zee manners, s'il vous plaît?"
 * "Très dangerous! Broggy, he grows angry, oui. And zen he cannot be bested! Your petit punches, I believe zey will not work!"
 * "Broggy, he jumps up on people, sometimes. He is naughty, oui!"
 * "You are craving zee punching now, honh? I told you, non! Non! Broggy, he laughs at your petit punches! But he is very much disliking zee fire. A flame attack is zee best choice!"
 * "Ah! So very cute, even as he runs away from moi! I am missing him already! Wait! Petit Broggy! FORGIVEZ MOI!"
 * "PETIT BROGGY! HUSHEZ VOUS! You will scare off zee guest, honh?"
 * "Ah! Monsieur Turtle Bits! We meet again, do we not? Oui. And zat is called fate."
 * "You wonder why I am here, oui? Well zen, you wonder no more. I am what you call zee bigwig. Ah oui! I 'ave promoted myself to manager of a shop to pay for Broggy's ravenous 'unger!"
 * "Do not let your eyes shop only! Buy somezing, s'il vous plaît! Oh, and if it is acceptable, give Broggy many coins, honh? Zey are 'is favorite food! Oh, Broggy! You love zem, oui? Give enough, and he trades for some nice gear! Maybe."
 * "WAAAAIIIIIIIIIIIT! Un moment!"
 * "Very busy, zat is moi!"
 * "Now, you know zat I am a block collector. Oui, you know zis. Other collectors, zey all know moi. Oui, I am zat famous. And yet, something still eludes zee great Broque Monsieur! It is a living block called a… BLITTY!"
 * "Zey are cute. Très, très cute. Nothing is so cute, non. And I must have zis thing! I NEED ZEE BLITTY! Imagine, petit Blitties running about as zee shop mascots!"
 * "You hear zis, snooty Broggy?! Zee future, it is Blitties!"
 * "I lie awake craving zee petit Blitties!"
 * "...So perhaps I ave gone off zee deep end a bit, but I beg you to find me zee Blitty. Ah, oui, many Blitties! For moi! You do zis! You will, I feel it!"
 * "Anytime you find zis magnificent beast, you return to zis shop! Zere will be good things for you if you do, I promise you zis!"
 * "Oh! Monsieur Turtle Bits! Your horns, zey are looking very much finer today! I must give zee dapper monsieur a present to reward zis style, honh?"
 * "Ah! What is zis I see? Blitty, ma cherie! Thank you! Merci! Come to me, Blitty!"
 * "I could talk about zee cuteness of Blitties forever and ever!"
 * "Blitties are zee rarest of zee rare, when it comes to blocks. Zey are cute! Zey are adorable! Zey are wanted by moi!"
 * "Zee life of a block collector, it is très dangerous, honh?"
 * "Zee Blitty is in zee monster! Why is zis? He is crazy!"
 * "I will lend you my Broggy! Oui! I will let you take my cute Broggy out for zee nice walk! He is so very savage, honh? Oui! He will bonk zee foes! Zee strength, so formidable! Zee barking, so very scary! Zis cute fellow, he will fight for Monsieur Turtle Bits!"
 * "Ah! Monsieur Turtle Bits! Zis block called to you, honh? What is zis block, you think. I must know! What is it? Well, it is a shop block! Oui, with zis magnifique block, you can enjoy zee pleasures of shopping while traveling! I set zee blocks in many places while I was searching for my naughty little Broggy, oui. And with zem, you can be face-to-face with Broque Monsieur in an instant. How nice, eh?"
 * "So tell me, Monsieur Turtle Bits. What is it you want, honh?"
 * "If you desire, I can provide zee fresh negative-ion treatment! When your HP and SP are low, zis is the thing you must do! Become utterly refreshed with zee negative ions? It is a mere 10 coins"
 * "NEGATIVE IONS GOOOOOOOO!"
 * "Order please, s'il vous plaît!"
 * "Oh! Monsieur Turtle Bits! Your horns, zey are even more savage than before!"
 * "Allô, Monsieur Turtle Bits! You are vacuuming, oui? You are collecting zee Blitties, oui?"
 * "Ah! Such a surprise! Monsieur Mario, oui? We have met somewhere... Oui? I cannot remember... But let us forget about zis... Let us talk about VOUS! You are zis famous block collector, I have 'eard! Oui, you hit zee blocks and turn zem all brown... Zis is madness! You do not feel zee block spirit! When you hit zee block, what? Zee value becomes nothing! 'Ow do I make zee profits with zee likes of you around? Leave and do not return to moi! Sorry for zee rudeness."

Chakron

 * "It is you, who is he."
 * "How would one describe me? I am...the voice within. I am your consciousness... I am above, and all around. I am all that is you. A consciousness bound to you, as you are to me."
 * "Shall we travel together?"
 * "Anger will get you nowhere."
 * "It matters not where you go, for I will speak my piece."
 * "I bear you no ill will. Our minds have bonded. This is a rare thing. So rare that I will teach you."
 * "This is called a Chakroad. A conduit for energy waves that bond earth to space."
 * "Be still in body and mind. Be one with immobility."
 * "Now we travel... With our MIIINDS!"
 * "Wondrous. Thrilling. Yes. Powers of earth and space. Our journey took us to a place etched in your mind. Do you understand? No. For you are unenlightened."
 * "I exist somewhere in this kingdom. And that is all. And now I go."
 * "The mists of consciousness part, and two figures emerge."
 * "In this place, Chakron meditates on the nature of all. It is Chakron's special place. And outsiders who disturb the mental peace are not welcome."
 * "You are unenlightened. That is why you are in a cosmic pickle."
 * "This pose absorbs waves from the deep parts of outer space. The waves crash upon my mind's shore. I am a mental beach. With the power of outer space upon me, I can do anything. Of late, large waves have rolled in, and wisdom surfs upon them. My brain hangs ten. And how long have I surfed? A thousand years. A thousand."
 * "Nothing! I feel nothing! Not even close. Not a wiggle. Not a single astral shimmy. Unless you have an attack that shakes the ground, give it up."
 * "Time for you to perambulate."
 * "This new pose displeases me... And gluing all those posts back together will be very tiresome."
 * "And now a thousand-year pose has fallen into the past's void."
 * "But I am already over my saddened state. I am at peace."
 * "I offer you this!"
 * "Oh. This new pose pleases me greatly. Waves of energy flow up from the earth to me. I shall now assume this pose for a hundred years."
 * "The power of outer space... I mean, the earth, is mighty. A short time ago I launched a large, angry being. Do you dare? Will you try it?"
 * "Your journey begins by gazing into outer space. Do not watch me. It is no fun if you know my secret."
 * "You have done well... I have watched you..."
 * "I am less than amazed... but you can try again... Reach higher ranks... and good things await..."
 * "Everyone grew super strong... You are amazing! Very well done! I rarely give praise to the unenlightened... But you truly are absolutely amazing!"

Corporal Paraplonk

 * "Call me crazy, but looks like Bowser's Castle is heading this way."

Dark Bowser

 * "Your body, I have copied... Your power, I have copied..."
 * "The dark power slept so long, and now it wakes... It must be freed... BEHOLD!"
 * "Still here? Has the dark power not yet crushed your puny hopes? Soon this kingdom will vanish along with all who dwell within. And you, too, will sleep eternally in the dark power's embrace!"
 * "Huuh huuh huuh...Haah haah haargh...I have...fallen...To come so far...so far..to lose..."
 * "Dark...Even with the dark power completed...The unthinkable happened..."

Dr. Toadley's intern

 * "The medical staff did what we could to ease the swelling..."
 * "But as far as we can tell, we can't reverse the effects..."
 * "Thanks for the news flash! Obviously we want to help!"
 * "Well, I have many patients, so you'll have to excuse me."

Fawful

 * "A WINNER IS YOU!"
 * "I HAVE CHORTLES!"
 * "I am having a goal! Mushroom Kingdom... WILL BE MINE!!!"
 * "All who resist will be beat like naughty little eggs!"
 * "Beef? I am lacking in beef. Fawful is beefless."
 * "It is I who added the nuts to the statue!"
 * "I HAVE FAWFUL!"
 * "Excited crowd, you feeling it? Fawful is also feeling it!"
 * "I have chortles at such stupidity!"
 * "Fawful is sitting on the cozy couch, sipping tea that laughs at you!"
 * "You keep appearing like an ugly rabbit out of a hat of a magician who stinks!"
 * "Fawful sings a song of bad!♪ The Mushroom Kingdom is so sad!♪ All of it is for Fawful!♪ And the...rhyme...with that!♪"
 * "Darkness! So very darkness!"
 * "I HAVE SUCTION!"
 * "Fawfully-doo!♪ Where are you?!♪ Dark Star, needing you!♪ Dark power, yoo-hoo!♪ WHERE TO FIND YOU...♪"
 * "You have gotten in Fawful's way at each of the turns... Just like the red and green mustaches who I hate..."
 * "I am Lord Fawful! I am ruling the world!"
 * "Fawful only has half the power, but I am thinking it is enough to KO you, the king of stupid!"
 * "Fawful says farewell to your finkrat faces forever!"
 * ''"Bowser! Meet...  FURY OF FAWFUL!"
 * "So, the tears are falling! But not on the face of Fawful!"
 * "Why... The failing..."
 * "You...mustaches...with...why...fury...whenever... Fawful...just wanted...some kingdom conquering... Fawful tried... Fawful gave the 110 percents... Fawful worked the overtime... Fawful was the team player... Fawful put in the hours... Fawful got the hands dirty... But every time... Always... The mustaches...arrive... Always in Fawful's way... Alwaysalwaysalways..."
 * "I have remorse... Fawful understands... Fawful gives up... Fawful will disappear with no troubles..."
 * ''"Here Fawful goes, the disappearing..forever disappearing... WITH YOU!"

Goomba from Fawful Theater
NOTE: During gameplay, the above dialogue appears too quickly for the player to read every word.
 * "Guest."
 * "Start."
 * "So this big galoot here, right? He's all like, I have no seeeat! No seeat! And he won't shut up! But he won't stop, and we're all, we just can't do it buddy, OK? So we have no idea what to do. And this lug's getting surlier. He's not going away. And he has no seat! Nothing! Not a chance! So we do some solid thinking and totally fail. No big seats! I mean, we got small seats! We can do a small seat, sure, but this guy's huge, so he's not gonna fit into a small one! Please! And it's kinda bugging me, 'cause I'm on my feet all day! I mean, I'd LOVE to sit in ANY seat. It's like, hey, pal, how about you try our job just once, y'know? It'd break him in two seconds! I work hard, Boss! Really hard! And this dude just sits through life?! So spoiled! It makes me ill! All the suffering in the world, and this guy's seating problem is urgent? Nooooooo! Ooooo!"

Kamek

 * "Hey! What did you feed Bowser, you creepy little weasel!?"
 * "That oughta fix you up."
 * "Whoa, chill out!"

Kuzzle

 * "You're what? Oh. Me. I'm Kuzzle."
 * "Who, me? I just told you! I'm Kuzzle. Did I say that? My ears aren't s'good. You can't tell by lookin', I bet, but I used to be called a sage."
 * "Who's on the puzzle what? Oh, you came for a puzzle! Boy, I am fond of the puzzles. Young folks today, they can't be bothered to use their heads, but when I was a tot... Puzzles were the hippest of the hip! You'd try to solve a puzzle faster'n anyone, you would! Speakin' of trendy tots... Young folks today, they can't be bothered to use their heads, but when I was a tot... Puzzles were the hippest of the hip! You’d try to solve a puzzle faster'n anyone, you would! Speakin' of trendy tots... Young folks today, they can't be bothered to use their heads, but when I was a tot... Puzzles were the hippest of the hip! You'd try to solve a puzzle faster'n anyone, you would! Speakin' of trendy tots..."
 * "What? I what? What was it?"
 * "Right, I was talkin' puzzle. Wonder if you guys can do it… Y'see, me, I make the puzzles the old-fashioned way... And them trendy Attack Pieces? I tried puzzlin' 'em up, but... Thing is, if I make me a puzzle, I can't never seem to finish it."
 * "You tots've done a jigsaw puzzle before, ain't you? You just take all these broken pieces here and stick 'em in the right places."
 * "What, now? It sounded like a "no." That's too bad…"
 * "Mmmm... let 'er rip."
 * "Ooooh! You did it! She's done!"
 * "Yep, my puzzles turn real when completed... Ain't that a wonder? I told you, I'm a mite shrivelly now, but I was once a sage. Well... I guess you tots need them Attack Pieces more'n me. For me, just seein' that there puzzle done is reward enough."
 * "Well, I'm sure you young tots are busy and all, but gosh... Any chance...you want to hang around with this old coot? Thing is, I ain't got nothin' here but an empty old house... yep, just a bit ago, there was what you call an "incident." Since then, I try to keep the place pretty empty, y'see... But the urge to splurge is strong in me, tots! Get me a little plush furniture, y'know? Problem is, all my furniture turned into puzzle pieces and scattered on the beach. The thing about 'em is... They’re not sealed away, exactly, but they are hidden... Yep, all over Plack Beach... Lots of them puzzle sacks... Complete them puzzles, tots, and this house'll be a wonder! How 'bout it? Don't sound so difficult now, do it? I got a reward, 'course. Sure! I'll fork over some of these beans I got here. You know 'em? They’re precious! Beans up HP, SP, and POW. But I'm getting' ahead of things. You go get them puzzle sacks. Don't you tots worry... I'll wait just as long as I have to."
 * "Oh... You want to know where them sacks are? I only know the general areas, to tell the truth..."
 * "Definitely here... Maybe here... Maybe here... Probably might be over here..."
 * "You tots go look for 'em... If you need to hear them locations again, just ask. Well, your move, tots..."
 * "Ready for a little puzzlin'? Or do you want to hear this old coot ramble for a tick or two?"
 * "Well, I'm a bit older and more shrivelly now, but I used to be a sage, and a popular one, too! Tots today, they just care about their looks, but not ol' Kuzzle! I didn’t give a toot about 'em! Me, I took pride in usin' the ol' bean to solve me a quiz or a humdinger of a puzzle. "Wow, excellent job, Kuzzle!" "Absolutely brilliant, Kuzzle!" "You're really hip, Kuzzle!" Oh yep, I was hip all right. I can still picture myself as I was then. Hip. Really hip. This house was a party pad back then. Luxurious décor, catering, bands, the works. But that were a while ago... Anyway, just t'other day... I was enjoyin' me a fine puzzle, as is my custom, when I had me a doozy of a pickle. I was about to put in the final piece, and at that moment... Yep... At that exact moment... He arrived... Oh, you tots know the fella... That big ol' galoot, Bowser... He came in pure angry... I tried to have him do a puzzle, but within thirty seconds he got way too peeved! He said... "I DON’T GET IT!"  So he started raisin' him a ruckus and messed up all the furniture in the room. On top of that, the galoot ran off with the Star Cure, which is a sage's charge. Oh, it's a tough ol' tale, yep. That big galoot was actin' like a big ol' baby... And ever since then, well, ain't nothing much has gone on around here. I mean, if he stormed in here again, there ain’t exactly anythin' for him to steal... And that's the tale, tots. Now this ol' coot would like to enjoy a peaceful puzzle. Anytime you're lookin' to do the same, you come by and visit old Kuzzle..."
 * "Oh, got yourself a puzzle, eh? How’s about I hang onto that. You tots feel the urge to jump into that puzzle right away? You can also retry ones you've already solved, of course. It's a challenge, tryin' to solve them puzzles quick as you can. Me, in my heyday, I'd always get a perfect score of 100."
 * "Can't wait to have me a nap on that."
 * "Yep, now that there is what I call hip design."
 * "Yep... Hip..."
 * "Hm... Gazin' out of this reminds me of the first lady of my life. Mysterious and strange, just like memory itself, young tots."
 * ''"That's some puzzlin' skill. Here. Beans up HP, SP, and POW. Fill out the décor in my place, and I'll get you tots more.
 * "Ooooh! Ah, yep! That’s pleasant! Awful pleasant, tots! All them old memories come floodin' back!"
 * "You two are good folk for indulgin' the request of... This old coot... You deserve a fine reward. Yep, I’m talkin' beans. By now, you know beans up your HP, SP, and whatnot."
 * "Anytime you feel like puzzlin', you tots just come on over. Challenge yourself to some timed puzzle runs, y'know? You can chase down my perfect 100-point score."

Midbus

 * "You. No longer needed. Here, you taste defeat."
 * "Sense is for the weak!"
 * "You listen. Peach, gone. Lord Fawful, new ruler. Now, no need of you. Lord Fawful says sleep. NOW YOU SLEEP!"
 * "You have grown giant. As has your cheating!"
 * "MUH MUH! The clock strikes payback hour. Do plan two. To your posts!"
 * "Bowser! Next time, I punch your thigh bone, your eye bone, and your dry bone!"
 * "Bowser! Next time goes a different way than this way went."
 * "Hmph. I scoff. I scoff at you. You bluff. It is time. The special weapon of Lord Fawful. I will release it. SUPER ULTRA WONDER ULTIMATE RUTHLESS GREAT IRON BALL! HYAH!"
 * "Now it is time! Now we will fight! Then you will lose! And you will cry!"
 * "You amuse me. I have fought Bowser. You are much smaller."
 * "You speak rudely. And I permit it just this once... Soon Dark Star awakes. And soon means later! Try to interfere with it, and taste my wrath!"
 * "No one pressed "dance"! You are broken!"
 * "He is of trash. And you are. You, trash. I call you trash. Go be trashy in this trash hole with this trash robot forever! Go! Super Ultra Great Mega Trashy Monster Junker Bot!"
 * "What? Nothing?!"
 * "Move! MOVE! Stupid junk!"
 * "Trash these trashmen!"

Narrator

 *  "THE BLORBS!"  
 * "Mushroom Kingdom Marred by Mystery Malady! The Blorbs!"
 * "It comes without warning! First, you balloon to blimp size! Then the rolling! You roll away! Oh, the horror of the blorbs!"
 * "As of press time, the cause and cure are unknown..."
 * "Day by day, the number of blorbed Toads swells..."
 * "Seeing how grave the situation is, Princess Peach convenes an emergency meeting at her castle..."

Princess Peach

 * "Yes… We've sent word to the Star Sprites for help, but…"
 * "We've gotten no response."
 * "Both of you… Calm down."
 * "You saved me once again. Thank you!"
 * "Starlow! Everyone's...OK! How wonderful!"
 * "Everyone... Thank you... You've saved our dear Mushroom Kingdom."
 * "Mario! Luigi!"
 * "Mario!"
 * "Luigi!"
 * "...Good luck!"

Private Goomp

 * "Yeah... It... Well, this weird duo just showed up and went nuts. Huge attack, and just like that, they had the castle..."

Sergeant Guy

 * "Get it together, Private Goomp! Let's scout this area, at least."

Starlow

 *  "PARDON ME!"  
 * "Sorry I'm late! This castle's huge!"
 * ''"Nice to meet you! I'm Starlow !
 * "Peach sent word of trouble in the Mushroom Kingdom…"
 * "So, as a representative of the Star Sprites, here I am!"
 * "HELLO YELLO!"
 * "Oh… Uh… Well…"
 * "Well, I did some research on similar afflictions, but…"
 * "The blorbs is in a class of its own. It seems to be incurable…"
 * "If we could just find a cause, we'd have a place to start…"
 * "Psst… Who is that over there?"
 * " Dr. Toadley ?"
 * "Look, I'm really sorry, OK?"
 * "There are some things that even a Star Sprite can't do!"
 * "I guess we just give up, huh?"
 * "YELLO GOODBYE!"
 * "It's not in the forest at all! It's inside Bowser's body!"
 * "The Dark Star...It's finally gone!"
 * "And the princess? Is she all right?"
 * "Oops. I said too much."
 * "What? You're still at it?"
 * "Look, give up already. Seriously, get over it. You're done with evil."
 * "Sounds good. No more evil, OK?"
 * "Luigi! Wake up! Everyone's out!"
 * "Yes! We made it out of Bowser's body!"
 * "Looks like Fawful's final ploy failed at the last... His last-ditch explosion rescued us all!"
 * "Listen, I'd advise not thinking about it too deeply, OK? It's all in the past, and what you don't know won't hurt you!"
 * "Yup. Your minion."

Toadbert

 * "Yeah, what's wrong with you, Toadsworth?!"
 * "There IS someone we can count on, by boogity!"
 * "So uh… What's up? They're not here yet? The bros ..."
 * "Now then, going on what little information we've unearthed..."
 * "The cause MAY be a mushroom sold by a local merchant."
 * ''"Well, yeah, we interviewed all the blorbed Toads we could... And they all said they'd bought Blorb Mushrooms."'
 * "Well, according to one witness, it was a fellow in a cape... All signs point to the suspect not being from this kingdom."
 * "Well, that's a sure way to end a meeting. I suppose we cancel it?"
 * "I know that voice, by boogity... Is Mario in here?"
 * "Wow, it IS Mario! It's me, Toadbert!"
 * "Yeah, Bowser inhaled me too. With almost the whole castle. I'm so happy we met up! Well, I'm not happy we're here, but..."
 * "Anyway, gotta say, it's pretty interesting in here, by boogity! There's all kinds of weird stuff! I feel like a gut spelunker!"
 * "Hmm? Princess Peach? Oh yeah, it makes sense that she would've been inhaled too... Unfortunately, I haven't seen her around here anywhere... She's gotta be in his body somewhere, though... I guess you just gotta keep trudging around, huh?"
 * "Yeah, I've been poking around... This whole area is a pressure point for Bowser's arm... It's just a theory, but I think if he punches while moving, he'll punch much harder than before!"
 * "Mario! By boogity!"
 * "That last shock opened up deeper byways in Bowser's body! Check this out! All the pipes Bowser inhaled piled up in this room!"
 * "That's right! These pipes should take us to the Mushroom Kingdom. If we use these, we can get out, by boogity!"
 * "Hurry! Get in this pipe!"
 * "Mario! You guys found your way here too, by boogity!"
 * "So I’ve been investigating this area, and I discovered that this region controls the body slam!"
 * "Yes, by boogity! Body slam! If my calculations are correct, the body slam somehow doubles Bowser's weight while airborne. With that doubled weight, Bowser can slam into the ground with incredible force! You see those three pressure points? If you stimulate them, you'll awaken the body slam... But right now pressure points aren’t active... Stimulating them right now wouldn't have any effect. Something somewhere in this area must activate those pressure points, by boogity! Mario! Luigi! See if you can find something! "
 * "The pressure points are active! Well done, by boogity! All right! Try stimulating those three pressure points, and we'll see what happens! "
 * "Body slam, by boogity! I guarantee you he can do body slams now!"
 * "That went well, by boogity!"
 * "Right, well, I’ll keep poking around to see what I can find. Bob-ombs AWAAAAAY!"
 * "Yuh... You guys! Good luck!"
 * "Toadsworth, by boogity! I was looking for you!"
 * "Really? That sounds fascinating, by boogity! You mind if I watch as it sloooowly works its magic?"
 * "Ahhhh! Toadsworth, your tea never fails to calm me down. Teatime is so restful..."
 * "Yes, take it slooow..."
 * "Mr. Mario! Mr. Luigi! I suspect that Bowser has learned the spike ball move!"
 * ''"Yes, by boogity! By stimulating this spot, we've made his muscle loose and incredibly limber!"'

Toads

 * "Mom, I'm home!"
 * "Well, hi there, sweetie! Home early today, huh?"
 * "Ms. Ingletoad just wouldn't stop talking. Blah blah blaaaaaah!"
 * "So I snuck out and came home!"
 * "You naughty little scamp!"
 * "You'll never grow up into a fine Toad with such bad behavior!"
 * "Fiiiiiiiine, Mom, whatever."
 * "So, is dinner ready yet?"
 * "Yes, dear, it is."
 * "But call your dad before we eat."
 * "DAAAAAAD! Dinner's ready!"
 * "Dad?"
 *  "YEEEEEK!"  
 * "What is it, dear?!"
 * "It's Dad! He's…"
 * "Soon the entire Mushroom Kingdom will get the blorbs…"
 * "We've gotta find the cause and get this place back to normal!"
 * "Yeah, obviously, but we've never dealt with something like this!"
 * "I have absolutely no idea what to do! I suggest we panic!"
 * "Pull yourself together, man! We have to do SOMETHING!"
 * "My son… He's also… He's also got the blorbs!"
 * "You docs gotta do SOMETHING! This is a national emergency!"
 * " Dr. Toadley's intern."
 * "He's a really famous doctor! He knows EVERYTHING!"
 * "He couldn't make it to today's meeting, so his intern is here."
 * "Hey! Mario ! Hurry! Hurry!"
 * "It's a meeting! Big meeting! You've gotta hurry, please!"
 * "Everyone's waiting, Mario! In the conference hall!"
 * "…Oh. Luigi came too. Super."
 * "Look, the conference hall is in back. Please hurry!"
 * "…Oh, but before you do, do you need an action-icon refresher?"
 * "OK then, keep your peepers on the lower right of the screen."
 * "Those things are action icons . They represent the actions that you guys can perform."
 * "The ones you see right now show Luigi's and your jumps."
 * "But the thing is, those icons… When Mario --that's you--gets near stuff, those icons change."
 * "Like, say Mario approaches someone her wants to talk to… Well, the icon changes talk this!"
 * "Then you press to get talking. Simple, right?"
 * "So say Mario nears something a little sketchy. In that case, the icon changes to this!"
 * "If you press at that point, you'll take a closer look."
 * "Watch for that icon to change ! Then make good use of ! Always remember that!"
 * Cool… What else… Oh, numbers under the icons. That's HP for you two. Y'know, your health.''"
 * "When that number gets too low, you're in big trouble, so both of you be careful, OK?"
 * "…Need to hear that again?"
 * "Whoa, you're old pros, huh? Cool--get to it, then!"
 * "Hey there! The conference hall is just up ahead."
 * "Yup, everyone's in there, and I'm sure they're eager to see you!"
 * Of course, there are many Toads working the grounds here too."
 * ''"If you want to chat with anyone, you know the drill--press.
 * "You'll probably hear some juicy tidbits! Or maybe not."
 * "Like gossip? Then get chatty with folks by pressing !"
 * "Ooooog. Mario!"
 * "Phew! You'll fix me up, won't you?!"
 * "I can't wait, seriously. Not a fan of the blorbs."
 * "Whoa, hey, Luigi ! Long time, no see!"
 * "What are you doing out and about today?"
 * "Mario! How's the jump holding up these days? Knees OK?"
 * ''"Remember, use for Mario and  for Luigi !
 * "This is Peach's Castle! …But you knew that."
 * "That intern that just passed by here…"
 * "Man, she was cute…"
 * ''"Ooog, not the conference hall.
 * " Conference hall is over there!"
 * "See this? Yeah. Save block. You see one, jump to hit it."
 * "Trust me, save whenever you can. Gives you peace of mind."
 * ""Save often, save your sanity.""
 * "My uncle used to say that all the time. A wild one, my uncle."
 * "Anyway, it's OK for Luigi to hit blocks too!"
 * " Save often! It's crucial!"

Toadsworth

 * "Oh! How absolutely wretched…"
 * "Such a thing has never happened in the history of the kingdom!"
 * "Princess! We still await..."
 * "Ah, glorious! I daresay our Star Sprite has arrived!"
 * "Princess... This thing is...what?"
 * "Mercy! Such pep! Such verve! Such unswerving confidence!"
 * "So you'll be able to simply cure the blorbs, then! Correct?"
 * "Hrm... If this is even beyond the power of a Star Sprite..."
 * "Blast... Doctors are stumped... The Star Sprite is helpless..."
 * "To whom might we turn?"
 * "Hmph! How insolent!"
 * "Oh! Quite right!"
 * "Hope endures!"
 * "Have at you! I'll thrash you! I'll... Ah. Could we be..."
 * "Princess. OH, PRINCESS! Such joy... You are safe! I'm simply awash with relief!"
 * "Good gracious! No... Not again! Princess! Flee!"
 * "Worry not! Masters Mario and Luigi are sure to trounce him!"
 * "Have at him!"

Wisdurm

 * "ENOUGH! Persistent men, aren't youuu? What is it you want with meee?"
 * "Hmm? The Dark Staaaar? Princess Peach captuuured? Mushroom Kingdom overrunnn?"
 * "Ahhhh... Traaaagic. Truly traaaagic. My sympathiesss."
 * "You want me, a sage, to give you, a nobody, the Star Cuure?"
 * "I don't know about thaaat… What physical proof do you have that your story is truuuue? Why should I believe youuuu?"
 * "This Star Cure was entrusted to the sole care of me, Wisdurm! Why would I hand it over to men who lack any credibiiiiility?!"
 * "Hmmmmmmmmm… You're quite persistennnnt. This troubles meeeee. You chase me without flaaagging. You demand the Star Cuuuure... Rather brazen, methiiiiiiinks..."
 * " Tut tut! Lost our temperrrrr? Somewhat childish, nooooo? And yet amuuusing! Regrettably..."
 * "Very wellll... If you are so insistent that I gave you the cure, we will battle for iiiiit."
 * "A battle with Wisdurrrrrm… The winner will own the Star Cuuuuuure. Yes? Then we beginnnnn. Wisdurm battle sequence STAAAAAAAAAAART!"
 * "Guh... Bluh... Gack... Haff..."
 * "Heh heh heh heh... So you have bested me on the field of baaaaattle. That victory has earned you the right to see me in my true forrrrrrm. Wellll? Not too bad looking, hmmmm? Heh heh heh heh..."
 * "Now thennnn... I am one of the guardians of the Star Cuuures. We sages knew the day of the Dark Star awakening would come, and so awaited the heeeeroes..."
 * "We have met many times, as you two well rememberrrr... The day Bowser ate me along with the giga-carrot was the day our fates crosssssed... heh heh heh heh... it is clear we are connected by a fate that is beyond our poor comprehensionnnn..."
 * "Of coursssssse… Here, take iiiit."
 * "And so my role here comes to an ennnnnd... Now, please stop following me around. It's creeeeepy... I wish you luck finding the other two Star Cuuuuures... Flapflapflap..."