List of quotes from Mario comics

The following is a list of quotes from Mario comics; they are listed by character.

Mario

 * "When the going gets tough, the tough read Dirk Drain-Head!" - "Bedtime for Drain-Head"
 * "Tea hea... I mean, tee hee!" - "Cloud Nine"
 * "But I've got drains to drain! Clogs to unclog! Remember... the noble plumber always comes through? Besides, this coat is turning my hair brown!" - "The Doctor Is In... Over His Head"
 * "Eat cake, shell scum!" - "Super Mario Adventures"
 * "I wish Luigi were here, I could blame him!" - "You Again?"
 * "Oh, no! The Princess is being forced to listen to a debate by two Fryguys about the names for the little things on the end of your shoelaces! What do you call those little things anyway? Tabs? End caps? Plastic nobbie deals?" - "You Again?"
 * "Stay away, you guys. I overslept, and I have to save the Princess!" - "You Again?"
 * "Oh no! It's a pipe-o-rama!" - "Super Mario Adventures
 * "You sure that kid's on your side?" - "The Buddy System

Luigi

 * "Actually, I had planned on spending the afternoon flossing my teeth." - "The Adventures of Dirk Drain-Head"
 * "That's a mirage, your royal nincompoopship!" - "Just Deserts"
 * "A pipeline job by tonight? I can't start a job this big on an empty stomach." - "Super Mario Adventures"
 * "Help, Mario! I'm swimming in a sea of pipes!" - "Super Mario Adventures"
 * "I think hunger is making me hallucinate!" - "Super Mario Adventures"
 * "Nooo! I've been having pipe dreams about that canneloni!" - "Super Mario Adventures"
 * "Help! I'm being devoured by vile vegetation!" - "Super Mario Adventures"

Bowser

 * "Who were you expecting? The Tooth Fairy?" - "The Legend"
 * "A stout ship, a loyal crew -- or else -- and lots of stolen money. This is the most fun you can have without pulverizing a plumber." - "Mutiny on the Fungi"
 * "Whose harebrained idea was it to make a coin operated battleship?" - "Mutiny on the Fungi"
 * "In case you didn't notice, I don't give a blond hog's hair about "honor"!" - "Mutiny on the Fungi"
 * "This is gonna be excellent!" - "Just Deserts"
 * "I should never have quit my day job!" - "Just Deserts"
 * "Sob! My beautiful fortress! And I was going to conquer the world on Tuesday!" - "Just Deserts"
 * "Will someone get me a drink without little paper umbrellas??!" - "Beauty and the Beach"
 * "Don't hold the bomb when it blows up -- You'll waste a perfectly good bomb!!" - "Beauty and the Beach"
 * "PTEWWW!! What is this?!!!! I didn't order Koopa Kola Plain -- I wanted Koopa Kola Crunchy!!!" - "Duh Stoopid Bomb!"
 * "My ol' pop used to say in situations like this - 'Son, when you put your mind to it, there's no problem big enough to run away from'!" - "The Buddy System"
 * "I wonder if I can put Lemmy up for adoption?" - "The Buddy System"
 * "You wondered about that too, huh?!" - The Buddy System
 * "Yeah? Well, they're gonna be flattened! King Bowser Koopa is nobody's fair game!" - "It's Always Fair Weather"
 * "I'n terriby disappointed in all of you. Except you, Lemmy. I know you're a blithering idiot!" - "Bowser Knows Best"
 * "What is it with you kids these days!! Is it hip to be stupid nowadays? Is there a fad nobody's told old dad about?" - "Bowser Knows Best"
 * "Testing, 1, 2, 3, testing... am I coming in loud and clear? And a one, and a two..." - "Super Mario Adventures"
 * "Ta ta, turtle dove, until next week. Here's a smooch for your sweet cheek." - Super Mario Adventures
 * "Bwa ha ha! My sinister plot worked!" - Super Mario Adventures
 * "Am I handsome or what!" - Super Mario Adventures

Ludwig von Koopa

 * "I think it should be cultural. The man desperately needs refinement." - "Bowser Knows Best"
 * ''"Thats music to my ears!" - Super Mario Adventures
 * ''"It was a piece of cake, pop!" - Super Mario Adventures
 * ''"Double anchovies for me!" - Super Mario Adventures

Morton Koopa Jr.

 * "It's Father's Day, Iggy -- We're gonna get him a present, you idiot!" - "Bowser Knows Best"
 * "Okay, guys! Get ready to pillage, level the place, mess things up..." - "Bowser Knows Best"
 * "Hello, princess, we're kidnapping you!" - "Bowser Knows Best"
 * "I always wanted to be part of an unruly mob." - "Bowser Knows Best"
 * ''"Double cheese, too!" - Super Mario Adventures

Wendy O. Koopa

 * "Well, Wendy Koopa, this is either the smartest thing you've done or the stupidest! If Daddy finds out I looted the arsenal, I'll be grounded till I get my fourth set of teeth! But it's not every day a girl gets her own personal spy network, warning her that Mario has to cross through here today, in fourteen minutes to be prescise!" - "Fins and Roses"
 * "I... Hate... Stanley... The Talking... Fish... OW!" - "Fins and Roses"
 * "Well I think that Daddy would like something pretty and shiny! Like maybe a diamond ring for me!!" - "Bowser Knows Best"
 * "Gee, Dad, when you put it that way, you make us sound dumb!" - "Bowser Knows Best"
 * ''"Mellow out, Dad!" - Super Mario Adventures
 * ''"The piranhas are always hungry! He'll make a fine meal!"
 * ''"And behind door number 2..." - Super Mario Adventures
 * ''"You're off your royal rocker!" - Super Mario Adventures
 * ''"The fools! They fell for it!" - Super Mario Adventures

Lemmy Koopa

 * ''"AH! Obviously I've done everything perfectly! Daddy will be so pleased!!" - The Buddy System

Princess Peach

 * "You mother scraps toilets in Hell!" - "Super Mario in Die Nacht des Grauens"
 * "What's the pipe panic? The Bros. are on the job." - "Super Mario Adventures"