List of Paper Mario: The Origami King quotes

This is a list of quotes spoken by the characters from the game Paper Mario: The Origami King.

Battle Lab Toad

 * "Woof! I mean...put up your dukes! I mean...come to the Battle Lab and put up your dukes! I mean...I run the Battle Lab in Toad Town. You should stop by sometime. It's near the museum!"
 * "Yeah, unless you know a shortcut. Like maybe that pipe up ahead on Overlook Mountain? Ahh, I'm still feeling a bit doggy, so I'm gonna woof it back. Hope to see you at the Battle Lab! Awoooo!"
 * "...Oh, I forgot to mention, we have a membership drive going on right now. Free gift for new members! ...Woof."
 * "Awoooo—I mean, woooo! It's you! Remember me? I'm the Battle Lab Toad you rescued a while ago. I guess that makes me a Battle Lab lab, in a way. I mean, if I had been a Labrador, which I wasn't. Um... I'm kind of better at training than talking. Why don't you come on in and I'll show you?"
 * "Yes! You came! Welcome to the Battle Lab. Now that we're under threat from those folded freaks, my setup may be of some use to you. You'll find the absolute latest technology, precisely engineered to develop your fighting skills. No towel service, though. Oh! But I told you about the membership drive, right? Here's your free gift!"
 * "You know how to use that thing, right? Just keep it on you...and if the going gets really tough, it'll give you a second chance. If you need more, check out the local shop, OK?"
 * "Hey, welcome back, Mario! I've been waiting to show you something new."
 * "It's called the Timer Extender! Are you tired of the ol' battle timer hitting zero before you're finished lining up your enemies? Well, this doodad will automatically pull some of your coins to bump that timer back up once per turn! It even has a "bankruptcy blocker" function that lets you set a cap on the amount of coins it pulls."
 * "I call it...the Puzzle Solver! You ever find some of these battle puzzles a bit TOO tricky? Honestly, who wouldn't? Use this machine to spot the best, uh, spot for enemy placement with a big ol' 〇 symbol! Puzzle SOLVED! You don't even have to spend coins or anything! It just works and works and works. Talk about a good deal!"
 * "You can set it up by opening the menu with and turning it On with ⚙. No thanks necessary, Mario. I'm just happy to be helping a real hero!"
 * "Go on—try out any machine you like. You're not gonna break 'em!"
 * "Ah, the hammer training machine. Good choice! It'll teach you how to perfectly time your hammer attacks...and totally shred your lats."
 * "Going for the boots training machine? Good idea! Anyone can squash a Goomba, but after you use this machine, you'll be timing those jump attacks like a pro."
 * "Ah, getting some guard work in. Great thinking! If you can't beat 'em, at least minimize the damage they're doing while they pulverize you!"
 * "Ah, that's the ring training machine. You ever get in a scuffle with some Folded Soldiers and you panic and line 'em up all weird? Well, here's your chance to work on that! And no one will attack you if you don't get it right. You've got two modes to try. There's your basic The Ringer mode, with 10 problems to solve per level... And Speed Rings mode, where you get [number] seconds to clear as many enemy lineups as you can."
 * "Ah, that one's not fully installed yet. But you're gonna love it when it's all done! It's a VR boss-battle machine! Come talk to me after you take out a boss and I'll explain more."
 * "Ah, this one's finally ready for you. The question is...are you ready for IT?! Yep, this baby is the latest in VR. It's called the Bossotronic Animated Machine Fighter, or just Bossotronic Fighter for short. Once you step into this bad boy, it's like you're stepping right back into a boss fight. But this time, you won't get a game over if you lose. You'll have the same kind of items and be about as strong as you were the first time around. It's crazy immersive! Anyway, go nuts in there if you want. If you can take out all the bosses a second time, there's even some kind of prize!"
 * "Wanna do some boots attack training?"
 * "Wanna do some hammer attack training?"
 * "Wanna do some guard training?"
 * "Wanna do some ring training?"
 * "You wanna use the Bossotronic Animated Machine Fighter?"
 * "Too late!"
 * "Too early!"
 * "Perfect!"
 * "Hey, I've got something for you if you can beat all of the Bossotronic Animated Machine Fighter bosses!"
 * "Nicely done, Mario! To be honest, I wasn't even sure that was possible. Here, you've more than earned this!"

Birdo

 * "Now I've got Mario madness... and you've got the only cure."

Bob-omb

 * "Me? Well... I'm Bob-omb."
 * "You know that memory-loss thing? What's it called... Ambrosia? Amnesty? Thinky Thinky Panic? Whatever you call it, I've got it—big time."
 * ''"My name is not Bombert. I am Bob-omb!"'
 * "Oh wait. I don't have arms."
 * "Heh. Right. I'm sure you'd stay TOTALLY on-task in there, ma'am. 'No distractions,' she says..."
 * "I guess we have to check out Shogun Studios after all, huh?"
 * "Yeah...she's not even thinking about the streamer anymore."
 * "This is what every Bob-omb hopes for—a chance to change something for the better. To make an impact."

Bowser

 * "Nobody makes Bowser walk with his face!"
 * "My minions! You monsters... I won't forget this. I'm gonna unfold my body and fold YOURS into pretzels!"
 * "Now, Mario... Ignore your floating friend and get me down from here. Bowser commands you!"
 * "She can't see me like this..."
 * "I know what you're going to do to my minion, so CUT IT OUT!!!"
 * "Do you know who I am!?"
 * "Bahaha! You heard him. It was luck! So let's cut the pity party and bust into that castle already!"
 * "Hey, origami girl! Look at me. I'm Bowser! I breathe fire and punch through solid rock sometimes! You think I'm scared of that little twerp?"
 * "Bah! Pipes are your thing. I'll be here when you get back."
 * "What?! That's crazy talk. The Toads can't come back from that, you know."
 * "BWAHAHA! I love it! Nice work, origami girl!"
 * "BWAHAHA! You got beat by a paper powerhouse! Eat gravity, you jerk!"
 * "GUH! HRNGH! This guy's tougher than he looks! I might...need some backup..."
 * "GRAH! HRRNGH! I'm gonna lose at this rate... Make yourself useful, Mario! Hit that thing!"
 * "ARGH! No! C'mon, Mario! Use that thing again!"
 * "Hey! Hurry it up, Mario!"
 * "Whose side are you on?!"
 * "Aw yeah!"
 * "Yeah! YEAH!"
 * "BWAHAHA! That's it!"
 * "More! MORE!"
 * "What are you doing?!"
 * "Are you crazy?!"
 * "Let's settle this!"
 * "How do ya like THAT?!"
 * "Behold my pushy power!"
 * "Keep pounding the floor! More! MORE!"
 * "This looks like the end! I'm too cool to go down like this!"
 * "GUHH! Too much cardio! I...I can't hold on!"
 * "Nooo! It's like pulling a bandage off halfway!" (After canceling pulling Bowser)

Bowser Jr.

 * "Ta-daa! How do I look?"
 * "No! Dad's airship!"
 * "Aww, man! Dad's not gonna be happy about the airship. His insurance premiums are already so high! And where are we, anyway?"
 * "Dad! You're OK! I was worried you got folded up even smaller or something. We'll be right there!"

Captain T. Ode

 * "Ah, the sea chart. And the Great Sea herself... Yes, everything is coming back to me... In this moment...I am as a bird in a cage. I yearn to sail free at the helm of my Marino, underneath the great cresting waves. I shall require the sea chart, as well as my noble vessel. Make it so!"

Colored Pencils

 * "Aw, man! You were almost out of the picture...for good."
 * "I'm sick and tired of Philistines like you ERASING all of my hard work, man."
 * "You probably haven't heard of me, right? Figures. When was the last time you even went to a gallery?"
 * "Pfft. Don't answer. I'm gonna give you an art lesson for free."
 * "The name's Jean-Pierre Colored Pencils the 12th. I represent the Legion of the Stationery, I'll have you know!"
 * "Anyway, I'm guarding this streamer, and I'll scribble on your flat face if that's what it takes to stop you."
 * "Feast your eyes upon my art-senal! Twelve colored pencils, ready to make your paper bodies my canvas!"
 * "Locked on targets!"
 * "They ALL missed?! No...my missiles are flawless! It's the TARGET that's all wrong!"
 * "No! NO! My lid is closed! I can't stop my missiles!"
 * "Did you enjoy my BITING critique?"
 * "Reload complete! And I have plenty more where these came from!
 * "Ugh. Everyone's a critic. I won't let my work be disrespected like this! Time to roll out my masterpiece..."
 * "Behold my Rainbow Roll!"
 * "Ugh...no way. Defeated by a no-name, no-talent piece of disgusting POP CULTURE! You were better when you were a sidescroller, man..."

Kamek

 * "You may have heard of me. I am known as Kamek!"

King Olly

 * "Oh, and by the way...I am no longer your brother Olly. I am KING OLLY! By the time I am done, all of those miserable Toads will be folded... reborn as loyal Folded Soldiers--serving me! And I shall fold, crease, and bend the entire paper world to my whim... The birth of a new origami kingdom!"
 * "So what do you say? Will you volunteer your paper body to the cause?"
 * "Ah, I expected nothing less. And to be honest, I wouldn't have it any other way." (After saying no)
 * "Oh really? You expect me to fall for such a simple trick?!" (After saying yes)
 * ''"Why couldn't Mario have simply left you in that wall where I put you..."
 * ''"Oh, hello."
 * ''"Yes. It's been a while, hasn't it?"
 * ''"Ahh, sister... You have such a flat outlook on life. All I am doing is creating a glorious kingdom for origami like us."
 * ''"How can you not grasp the brilliance and daring of my plan?"
 * ''"Very well."
 * ''"I thought perhaps you would listen to reason. I see I was mistaken."
 * ''"Ever since you've teamed up with this Mario fellow, you've been nothing but a crinkle in my neck."
 * ''"It ends now."
 * ''"Consider this path closed."
 * ''"Alas, there will be an empty origami throne beside mine..."
 * ''"But no matter. The birth of my Origami Kingdom is imminent. You may as well sit back and wait for its arrival."
 * ''"Well, you're finally here. Took you long enough."
 * ''"As a matter of fact, it took you so long that there is nothing you can do to stop me now."
 * ''"Oh, the princess is right in front of you. Behold!"
 * ''"I told you, didn't I? That I would transform all of Peach's Castle into an origami castle. Including the princess herself."
 * ''"She is at one with the castle now. Beautiful, precious and silent. I'm sure she's happier this way."
 * ''"I would. And I did."
 * ''"Witness The Thousand Cranes technique! He who has the patience to fold 1,000 origami cranes shall have any wish granted."
 * ''"That is real, ultimate power, and I shall use it to turn every last one of those wretched Toads into mere blank paper."
 * ''"Of course I do! He's the whole reason I'm doing this!"
 * ''"That fool disrespected the very paper I am made of... He scribbled all over it!"
 * ''"Now I bear the hideous scar of his negligence and disregard for origami... And he shall pay!"
 * ''"If you've seen one Toad, you've seen them all! They're all the same to me!"
 * ''"That's why I have to turn them all into blank pieces of paper. So I never have to see a single one of their stupid faces again!"
 * ''"That... is my vision for a glorious origami kingdom."
 * ''"As for you, Mario. You've proven to be quite annoying."
 * ''"But there's nothing you can do now to stop me. Already, 999 of my cranes are complete..."
 * ''"After I defeat you... I'll honor your paper by folding you into the very last crane!"
 * ''"Your adventure ends here, Mario."
 * ''"I WILL fulfill my dream. If you won't fold willingly... I shall bend you to my will by force!"
 * ''"Indeed. I've mastered the techniques of every Bibliofold. Now... witness how a KING wields these powers!"
 * ''"*pant, pant* You... surpassed the power of my superior, folded paper..."
 * ''"SHUT IT! I don't need your pity!"
 * ''"I folded you so we could turn this flat world into an origami kingdom..."
 * ''"But you betrayed me... and allied yourself with these paper peasants!"
 * ''"Don't you see, Olivia? We're both origami! Why are you fighting me?!"

Koopa Troopa

 * ''"We'd go try to stop him, but, y'know... We're Koopa Troopas. What are we gonna do? Walk into him slowly?"

Goomba

 * ''"We're the front line! That's proof that we're Lord Bowser's favorites. We always give 110 percent."

Hammer Bro

 * ''"You did it, man! First paper to ever defeat scissors. They're gonna write a book about it, and then a movie that everyone will hate."

Hole Punch

 * ''"Hey! DJ! You call that music? I call it a racket! Stop scratchin' around, and put on somethin' I can dance to! If I ain't movin' to the groove when the needle drops, I'm gonna collect your face like a limited-edition seven-inch single!"
 * ''"I hate it! This song was overplayed the first time it hit the airwaves! They tried to make us love it by putting it on high rotation, but I'm not gonna fall for that. No way! Loop the best five seconds, put it in a car commercial, and throw the rest in the trash. I'm done with it!"
 * ''"I hate it! OK, OK, yeah... I can see why people like this song, but it's just not for me, you know?"
 * ''"I hate it! What am I? A tap dancer? The tempo's way too fast on this track! Drop the RPMs! Or better yet, drop the whole album in a dumpster. No, thanks!"
 * ''"Now that's groovy! Uhhhh! That bass line is making my body do things I never dreamed possible. I'm ready to get down! Wait, wait, wait... I'm not gonna be the only one down there gettin' loose. Why's this place so dead? Who killed the mood? I'm not gonna cut the rug unless EVERYONE is cutting a rug? Dig?!"
 * ''"Whoa... I dig it... Oh yeah... Oh yeah... Oh yeah... It's groovy!"
 * ''"Lady, I couldn't stop groovin' now if I wanted to. So I guess we're gonna have to... FACE. OFF."
 * ''"I am PUMPED. I'm gonna own this dance floor till the break of dawn. And, seeing as there's no sun to rise in here, that means this groove is never gonna end! HEY! C'mon!"
 * ''"I'll start with some moves even amateurs can appreciate. Ooh, c'mon! One, two, PUNCH!"
 * ''"You wanna dance? You wanna DANCE, bro?! Let me show you what you're up against! Hup! One, two! Alriiight!"
 * ''"Is it time for me to bust out my super-secret special dance move? Let's hear it! Make some noooise!"
 * ''"No way! You dodged my special move?! Get back down here so I can two-step on your face!"
 * ''"Oh, man... Why'd you have to harsh my groove? We had it bumpin' in here! Let's keep it going anyway. Disco forever! Count it down!"

Oarsman

 * "I'm the single-oar sculler fer the Autumn Mountain downriver tour! I was folded fer way too long... Went a bit bananas."
 * "Ya think your day was stressful?! I was a monkey!"
 * "Welcome to Shogun Studios!"
 * "It's a SUPER popular location, full of SPECTACULAR shows and AMAZIN' attractions."
 * "If ya look up ahead, you'll see Shogun Studio's famous castle!"
 * "We could continue the river tour, if ya'd like. Sweetpaper Valley is jes' up ahead. What'll it be?"
 * "What in the- Where'd this thing come from? We can't pass through the gate with this in the way!"
 * "Yep. We'll have to turn around and head back fer now."
 * "OK, then! You folks go have fun. I'll be waitn' here when you're done!"
 * "Howdy, folks. We can't go any further with that blue thing blockn' our path. Whatcha wanna do?"

Ol' Grandsappy

 * ''"I've hardly got the hardwoods to speak, let alone learn you some manners... *hack*"
 * ''"If you can find a way to restore my energy, I may just let you two leave this place."
 * "Ach! Ptooey! Nope. That ain't it." (After giving Ol' Grandsappy the Shriveled Seed)
 * "It's doin' something! Watch out now!" (After giving Ol' Grandsappy the Soul Seed)
 * ''"That little seed was all it took. Tightened up my timbers and put the funk back in my trunk. I'm young again!"

Olivia

 * "It's cramped and dark...almost like I'm in between dimensions or something"
 * "That...that sounded good! Are your arms all big and foldy now?" (After using the first Magic Circle)
 * "Oh, was I just stuck in that wall?" (After freeing Olivia)
 * "Save complete, huh? Guess that means your adventure up to this point has been saved! Phew!" (After hitting the first Save Block)
 * ''"Everything here is made of paper, of course, so every little bit of confetti is like a tiny piece of our world."
 * "I'm going to stop you, Brother. As your sister, it's my duty..."
 * "It's eating it?!"
 * "What?! Hang on. Are you telling me this place is..."
 * ''"A THEME PARK?! That sounds like so much fun! Can we go? Please?
 * "Well, Mario...it looks like we HAVE to check out Shogun Studios. It would be irresponsible not to."
 * "So Shogun Studios it is! Right? We're gonna stop here, right? Please?"
 * "WHAT?! We're not going to Shogun Studios? But...but..." (if the player chooses to go downriver)
 * "Shogun Studios..."
 * "We do? My goodness! I guess you're right, Bobby! What a great idea. So glad you thought of it."
 * "Yesss! Oh, we're going to have SO much fun in Shogun Studios!"

Princess Peach

 * "How good to see you…"
 * "Shouldn't the Mushroom Kingdom... unfold? And be refolded unto glory?" (first question)
 * "And what of those... Toads? Shouldn't they be silenced... for all of eternity?" (second question)
 * "Will you crease yourself and be reborn, just like me?" (third question)
 * "Wrong answer. Right answer. It matters not. All your responses are all paper thin."
 * "Goodbye..."
 * ''"Why are you still so...flat?"
 * ''"Why haven't you joined me in folded glory..."

Professor Toad

 * "Well, all things considered, it could have been wors-Wait! Who are you? I've never seen anything LIKE you. Are you one of the Ancient Ones? Tell me!"

Luigi
(Red streamer)
 * ''"Isn't this great, Bro? Back on the road again together and heading to some kind of festival!"
 * ''"What did the invitation say again? An Origami Festival? What's that gonna be like?"
 * ''"And I can't wait to say hello to Princess Peach! It's-a been a while."
 * ''"Here we are, Toad Townn! And there's Peach's Castle."
 * ''"...Where is everybody? You don't think we missed it, do you?"
 * ''"Mario! Check the invitation again! When were we supposed to be here?"
 * ''"Well, it's the right day! You think they're still getting things ready?"
 * ''"Let's-a go check the castle. Maybe everyone's inside."
 * ''"Here we are. Peach's Castle!"
 * ''"I'm gonna park the kart, OK? I don't wanna tip the valet."
 * ''"Sorry for the wait, Bro. Let's-a go see the princess!"
 * ''"It's kinda spooky in here, isn't it? And where is everybody? I'd expect to see at least one Toad by now..."
 * ''"Mamma mia! I forgot our gift in the kart! I'll just dash over and get it."
 * ''"OK, I don't like that."
 * ''"How'm I gonna get outside when the door is locked?!"
 * ''"Don't worry, Mario. I know just what to do in situations like this."
 * ''"You just gotta find Mario! Right, Mario?"
 * ''"....Oh."
 * ''"OK...I'm just gonna take a deep breath and go find the key to this door. That's what you'd do, right?"
 * ''"Tell Princess Peach I'll be right there if you see her first, OK? Bye-Bye!"
 * ''"...Help me!"
 * ''"...I'm all folded up somewhere! Maybe in between dimensions? Someone hellllp!"
 * ''"...Um..."
 * ''"...I'm so close, Bro..."
 * ''"Am I saved? I feel weird!"
 * ''"Whew! That's-a more like it."
 * ''"Let's see... a Shy Guy put me there! But not a regular Shy Guy. It was... thick... and edgy..."
 * ''"Before I knew it, it had folded me up and tucked me away in there. Said it'd come back for me later!"
 * ''"My hat?! But what happened to the whole castle?"
 * ''"And where's Princess Peach?"
 * ''"Oh! That's right! I was gonna go look for the key to Peach's Castle. We got locked in, remember?"
 * ''"Mario's always saving me... so I just wanted to do something nice for him for a change."
 * ''"I'm really happy to see my hat again... but I've still gotta find that key. Let's-a go!"
 * ''"I do need the hat."

(Blue streamer)
 * ''"Waaah! C-can't... move!"
 * ''"Somebody! Anybody! Preferably Mario, if possible! Save me!"
 * ''"Save me!"
 * ''"Can't move!"
 * ''"Huh?"
 * ''"I'm-a moving?"
 * ''"I'm-a saved!"
 * ''"Hooray!"
 * ''"Uh..."
 * ''"I'm-a NOT saved! Help!"
 * ''"You saved me! Thanks, Big Bro!"
 * ''"Good timing too. I have a surprise!"
 * ''"It's-a the key to Peach's Castle! I finally found it!"
 * ''"You wouldn't believe the day I've had in this wacky theme park."
 * ''"I was heading back to find you... when a terrifying Chain Chomp tried to bite my face off!"
 * ''"I ran into this-a house to hide, but couldn't find the exit. Then, BAM! Niinjas started flying at my face!"
 * ''"Eventually I tumbled down here... Next thing I know, I'm-a gummingup the works. With-a my face."
 * ''"Yep. It's-a been a rough day for me and my face... but it was all worth it to finally hand over that key!"
 * ''"What?! I risked my face to find the wrong key? Now I'm-a losing face... and it's the only one I've got!"
 * ''"It was hanging on the wall in such an important spot... I thought for sure I had the right one."
 * ''"OK! I won't let this get me down! I'm-a gonna find the REAL key to Peach's Castle!"
 * ''"See you later, Big Bro! You too, Olivia!

(Yellow streamer)
 * ''"Mario! You saved me!"
 * ''"...Does that mean you actually won the game? How'd you do it?!"
 * ''"Nah, don't answer. I wanna try and beat it myself. Anyway, guess what. I got the key to Peach's Castle. Really!"
 * ''"Can you believe it? That hotel had it just sitting at the front desk! The key to Peach's Castle!"
 * ''"They also had a really nice pool, and I could use a vacation..."
 * ''"Wait, what?! They said it was a "sweet key," and Peach is the sweetest person I know, so..."
 * ''"Don't worry! I'm not-a giving up!"
 * ''"I'll find that key! And I'm gonna come back here and win this carnival game too! Bye bye!"

(Purple streamer)
 * ''"Hey, Bro! Got the key! Come find me on the mushroom-shaped island! Luigi" (A letter from Luigi, can be found in: "Crescent Moon Island")
 * ''"*smack, smack* Hm?"
 * ''"Ah, is that you, Bro? I wondered when you would finally get here."
 * ''"I've been super busy. It's-a really hard to swin in overalls, y'know?"
 * ''"But now? I'm-a relaxing to the max. I've earned a break... cause I finally found the key to Peach's Castle!"
 * ''"Whaaat? Wrong again?!"
 * ''"Ahhh, I DID think it was kinda weird. That key isn't Peach's style at all..."
 * ''"Oh, this place isn't mine. I just stopped here for a nap. Swimming across the sea tuckered me out!"
 * ''"Now that you mention it... I didn't see anyone here when I arrived."
 * ''"I should probably find whoever lives here and thank them for letting me catch a quick nap on their island"
 * ''"Wowie! There's origami everywhere!"
 * ''"Whoever lives here must REALLY love origami."
 * ''"HOME?!" (Luigi and Mario surprised)
 * ''"Wait a minute. Your brother folded you to life... but he's also origami..."
 * ''"So... who folded HIM?"

(Origami Castle)
 * ''"Big news, Bro! You know the key I've been looking for?"
 * ''"Mamma mia! It's been there the whole time? So all this searching I've been doing was for nothing..."
 * ''"Princess! I'm-a coming!"
 * ''"Hey, guys! I hope I didn't miss too much. I found the Origami Craftsman!"

Rubber Band

 * ''"ATTENTION, honored guests of Big Sho' Theater! Your attention, if you please! Today's very special performance will begin VERY shortly... So fill those seats before I SNAP! My patience is stretching thin. I shan't tell you TWICE!"
 * ''"Last call! There are still three VERY open seats in the VERY front row."
 * ''"Attention, audience! We have a few FINAL announcements for our VERY special guests. Outside food or drink, flash photography... and opening the menu screen while onstage are all strictly, super-duper prohibited. With that said, please sit back and enjoy this VERY special show!"
 * ''"ARGH! That's NOT how that scene was written! They were supposed to POP you to SMITHEREENS! Ugh. I DESPISE improvisation. Time for the next stage! Let's make sure he "breaks a leg" this time... Hee hee hee!"
 * ''"UGH! That's NOT how that act was supposed to end! I mean, really! There's no way Mario is actually THAT strong! Talk about a STRETCH! You Paper Macho goons had better band together in the NEXT act... or I may SNAP!"
 * ''"Ooooh, I have HAD IT with your show stealing and grandstanding! You wish to be the STAR? Fine! Come on up and face the MUSIC!"
 * ''"No, no, NO! The star of the show isn't Mario, you uncultured HACKS! The real superstar...is MEEE!"
 * ''"Ah! Such a long monologue...yet you didn't flub a single line! Have you ever considered a career in acting? Oh, never mind! Your SKILL at the performing arts shan't trip ME up! Get ready! This shall be your FINAL performance!"
 * ''"Behold the POWER of my rubber bands! Let's see how well you take stage direction, ha ha!"
 * ''"♪Ooh, your PITIFUL attacks have no effect on my BOUNCY body!♪"
 * ''"Prepare yourselves! Here comes my Rubber Bind attack!"
 * ''"OW! HEY! Don't YANK on my bands like that! That's no way to treat a STAR!"
 * ''"The curtain's been pulled back! I've been EXPOSED! You've reduced my ensemble to a one-man band! You'll PAY for that!"
 * ''"Ohhh! It wasn't supposed to end like this, Mario... The AGONY! The BRUTALITY! The sheer injustice of it all! O muses! O bard! Have you TRULY forsaken me for these flimsy, flat, PAPERY beings? I wanted to make this place GRAND! Eliminate things DULL and bland! Alas, this was my FINAL stand. It's curtains for poor Rubber—*gaaasp*"

Scissors

 * ''"Hmph. Well dodged. Of course, I expect nothing less. It would have been terribly boring to end things so quickly, yes? Why don't you warm up a bit? I'll send out my new pet for you to play with."
 * ''"And yet, you must face it. Have fun! I'll be waiting if you happen to survive."
 * ''"I suppose any toy made out of the faces of those pathetic minions was bound to be flimsy. No matter. I trust you've warmed up? En garde!"
 * ''"Let's get this straight: I WILL annihilate you... but I don't see why we can't have some fun first. After all, where's the challenge in slicing you to strips immediately? Therefore, I shall grant you... a slight advantage."
 * ''"See? My blades have been sheathed. We're on equal footing. However! Should you damage this cover during our battle... I shall interpret such boldness as a direct challenge...and I won't hold anything back!"
 * ''"PFAH! Amateur! You've broken the safety cover! I did warn you... My blade has been unsheathed... Now it must taste ink and paper!"
 * ''"All right! Enough. It was fun while it lasted...but your feeble attacks have grown tiresome. Let's CUT to the climax! Ha haaa!"
 * ''"You shan't be needing these...and I prefer an uncluttered battlefield."
 * ''"I'm readying my ultimate attack! You won't stand a chance!"
 * ''"Guarding is useless! This is the end for you, you flat fiends! FAREWELL!"
 * ''"HEY! Th-that's not fair! You can't jump OVER it! Ooh, you CHEATER! Stay right there! Let me go again..."

Sea Captain Toad

 * ''"I've been stuck up on this mountain for days, longing for the open sea..."
 * ''"See, I'm actually...Sea Captain Toad!"
 * ''"I'll be tending to my ship by the port in Toad Town. Stop by and give me an "ahoy" on your next visit!"
 * ''"Phew! Flops for flopping me out!"

Shy Guy

 * ''"In even better news, the Sudden Death round is your chance to earn another fabulous prize! And in slightly worse news, if you lose, it's game over."
 * "That adds up to a grand total of (number) points. You still need (number) more points to win!"
 * "Oh no! Even if Mario gets everything right from here on out, he still can't get enough points to win."
 * "And you know what that means...Game over!"
 * "The rings have been set. The answer awaits. But is it the right answer? There’s only one way to find out..."

Snifit

 * "It's not fair! I can't be paying people out—I'll go outta business!"
 * " Wrong! "
 * " Time's up! "
 * "Nope! So sorry."
 * "Time's up... So sorry."
 * "Let's try again. The number of chances you have left...is 2/1."

Tape

 * ''"Hey! I'm elevatin' here!"
 * ''"You Mario? I've got a message for you from the boss. How 'bout ya come over here so I can give it to ya? And you, origami kid... Be a good goil and run back to Olly. It's past your beddy-bye time, capisce? You two were gonna try and take dis streamer out of the picture, eh? I come in strips too, ya know. You got a grudge wit' things dat wrap over other things? You think I'm some kinda JOKE? EH?"
 * ''"HEY! I'm not tacky! I'm STICKY! DAT'S IT! Ya want a piece of me? Well, you're gonna get it!"
 * ''"Heh heh heh. I got a feelin' dis is gonna be a fun one. C'mon, you two! Throw your best attacks at me. We'll see what sticks!"
 * ''"Hey! Don't go messin' up my hard woik! Ya gotta tidy up, y'know? Can't leave no evidence..."
 * ''"Ah-ah-ah! Not so tough without the jumps, are ya? Heh heh."
 * ''"WAAAAAAH!"
 * ''"Heh heh heh!"
 * ''"You two got some noive, bustin' up my precious, tailor-made dispenser like dat. It was worth a fortune, not to mention the senty-mental value! If dat's how you want it, I might as well DISPENSE wit' the pleasantries. Time to seal the deal, heh heh!"
 * ''"See what ya made me do? Ya got me breakin' out the doity tricks! All right. Let's wrap this up, eh? Heh heh heh!"
 * ''"Hey! I'm attackin' over here!"
 * ''"Hey, look at me! I'm on a ROLL! Now DAT'S what I call a stickup! Heh heh heh!"
 * ''"Hey! I'm acceleratin' here!"
 * ''"Think you can get da jump on ME, eh? I don't think so! STICK 'EM UP!"
 * ''"Aaah! It hoits! It HOITS! Don't do dis to me! I'm a changed adhesive! I won't stick nobody up no more, I swear! Boss! Olly! Ya gotta do somethin'! Ya gotta avenge me! I'm... I'm... Ehhhhh, fuhgeddaboudit."

Toad

 * ''"To all the origami... Thank you!"

Toad's BBQ Foodeatery caretaker

 * ''"That was too close for clam! I mean too clam for comfort."

Toad mechanic

 * ''“Whew! Thanks, buddy! Got myself in a real pickle there. I sure am glad you came along! And you WILL be glad you came along when you see the kind of value we're offering here today at Toad's Automoboots!”

Toad Researcher

 * "Sensational! You found me, Mario! This is perfect! I've finally found a suitable tester... See, I'm the head researcher here at the Sensor Lab. We develop technology capable of detecting all kinds of things that are otherwise difficult to see. Sensor tech is changing the world! We're breaking conventions and shifting all manner of paradigms!"
 * "Because you've shown an aptitude for Toad detection, I shall let you test our new creation...Toad Radar! With this little beauty, you can suss out hidden Toads without suffering even a single crease in your brow!"
 * "*ahem* Testing! One-two! One-two! Can you hear me, Mario? Let me walk you through a quick test of the Toad Radar."
 * "Can you feel the device on your head? As you may have guessed, that's the Toad Radar!"
 * "The dish will scan the area and react to any hidden Toads you may be facing."
 * "The closer you are to a potential Toad, the stronger the Toad Radar will react. When you think you've found one, try whacking nearby objects with your hammer to unfold the Toad!"
 * "This advanced level of detection uses a MASSIVE amount of power, so the battery will drain quite fast. No power, no Toad Radar. Got it? Keep an eye on your battery!"
 * "OK! That's enough explanation. Let's run some actual tests!"
 * "Amazing! It works! Thanks to you, our test was a total success."
 * "Oh. Oh dear. You ran out of power."
 * "Sensational. I've truly outdone myself this time... Ah! Mario! Join me in a little thought experiment, won't you? What if, rather than detect unseen objects...we were to create a device that makes YOU undetectable? You needn't wonder! Feast your eyes, while you can, upon...the Lamination Suit! Wearing this will make it easier for you to sneak by enemies! BOOM! Another paradigm shifted!"
 * "OK, Mario. Let's have you try the Lamination Suit on for size."
 * "Do you see? Or rather, do you NOT? The suit turned you transparent! Now you'll be able to sneak by your enemies undetected. It's a clear path to victory!"
 * "Be careful not to bump or brush against any foes. That would reveal your position! Enemies with sharpened senses will see right through this trick...rather than seeing right through you. Ha!"
 * "Just like the Toad Radar, the suit's battery will drain rather quickly. Keep an eye on your power!"
 * "Enough gabbing. Time to put this see-through suit to the test!"
 * "You made it through all of the tests! Nice work, Mario!"
 * "Ah! The Lamination Suit makes you invisible to Folded Soldiers, but touching them will give you away!"
 * "At long last...my opus is complete. My work has reached its zenith. My Hidden Block Unhider will turn nearby hidden blocks into regular, unhidden blocks! We've taken this paradigm and HURLED it into the lake of progress! BEGONE, PARADIGM!"
 * "Hop down that pipe and I'll give you a quick primer on how to work the [gadget]."
 * "I must say, that went exceedingly well. The Toad Radar didn't even explode this time! How lucky! All that remains before certification is a robust field test. Go out into the world, Mario! Use the Toad Radar to rescue some hapless, folded Toads!"
 * "Yet another explosion-free test! This may be our longest streak ever! We're free to advance to the field test for this item as well. As I mentioned in the test, more- powerful foes may still sense your presence. Be careful out there!"
 * "We have shifted every existing paradigm. A new era of superior sensory apparatus is dawning. You know what to do, Mario. Take this Hidden Block Unhider with you! Find every ? Block out there! Most importantly, if it explodes... do NOT tell anyone. I've already sent some rather boastful faxes."
 * "Are you ready to learn the secrets of the Hidden Block Unhider, Mario?"
 * "The device on your head looks familiar, doesn't it? The Hidden Block Unhider shares its design with the Toad Radar... and it's similar to operate!"
 * "The device will alert you if and when you're facing a hidden block..."
 * "As you get closer, it will give you stronger and stronger reactions. Try jumping right there, Mario."
 * "Aha! A hidden block has appeared! Welcome to the visible world, you slippery cube, you! When you know you're close, a simple jump or swing of your hammer should do the trick."
 * "Like our other devices, the battery is going to run out sooner or later. Just keep an eye on the meter!"
 * "OK! Let's hunt for some blocks!"
 * "Incredible job, Mario! There isn't a block in the world that can outwit you now!"
 * "When the battery runs out, you can use our proprietary device charger to juice it back up! However... Its use requires a MODEST donation. Power isn't cheap, and funding is hard to come by..."
 * "My work here is incomplete. There are paradigms yet unshifted, so... back to it!"
 * "Would you like to test the [gadget]?"
 * "Want to go one more round with the [gadget]? No rush!"
 * "Aha! I sensed you'd be back for more, Mario! Which of my creations would you like to test today?"
 * "I sensed...wrong? Oh, dear me. This will require some serious recalibration. If you change your mind, our doors are always open for testing!"
 * "Would you like to visit our satellite office at [location]?"
 * "Which satellite office would you like to visit?"
 * "Ah, I'm afraid that office is being unresponsive. Perhaps there's a paper jam on the other end?"
 * "Care for a refresher on how to use our Toad Radar?"
 * "Care for a refresher on how to use our Lamination Suit?"
 * "Care for a refresher on how to use our Hidden Block Unhider? "
 * "My work is finally complete. So...now what? I guess I could...find a new hobby? Maybe I'll learn how to fold origami..."

Toads (battle audience)

 * ''"It's sharp! Watch your feet!"
 * ''"That hammer will never reach."
 * ''"Flames?! No! Come on, man!"
 * ''"It's gonna vanish! Wait for it!"
 * ''"Which tiles were they on?"
 * ''"Now! Use a Fire Flower!"
 * ''"Hammer! Hammer!"
 * ''"Jump! JUMP!"
 * ''"That's too hard..."
 * ''"Try sliding some of them!"
 * ''"I wanna see you turn them!"
 * ''"Aww! Too bad."
 * ''"Whoopsie doodle!"
 * ''"Ooh! Nice lineup!"
 * ''"Turn the inner ring! Quick!"
 * ''"What about the second ring?"
 * ''"Turn the third ring, obviously!"
 * ''"Maybe the outer ring?"
 * ''"Put 'em on ice, Mario!
 * ''"Mario! Use an item!"
 * ''"Try a Tail! Trust me!"
 * ''"Hey! He did it!"
 * ''"Uh-oh! Surf's up!"
 * ''"It's gonna flood the panels!"
 * ''"Phew! Magic Circle!"
 * ''"Something big is coming..."
 * ''"Lift it up, Mario! HEAVE!"
 * ''"It's the tail! Go for the tail!"
 * ''"It smells AMAZING in here."
 * ''"Uh-oh. I stared directly at it..."
 * ''"Hot enough for ya?"
 * ''"Aah! Put out those flames!"
 * ''"Extinguish it! Use water!"
 * ''"Send that rubber band flying!"
 * ''"Yank on it!"
 * ''"It's still alive?!"
 * ''"I thought he had it for sure!"
 * ''"Press A to guard!"
 * ''"Can't he use a Magic Circle?"
 * ''"Don't get TOO close..."
 * ''"That shape...oh no!"
 * ''"I call this Roshambo."
 * ''"Go for the hammer!"
 * ''"Knock it over! Whack it!"
 * ''"ROCK PAPER SCISSORS!"
 * ''"I'm snaking in my boots!"
 * ''"Is this Rock Paper Slithers?"
 * ''"1,000-Fold Arms are amazing!"
 * ''"Break the ice! Ask how it is!"
 * ''"Melt it with fire!"
 * ''"Hurry up! I'm freezing!"
 * ''"Attacks won't work?! Oh no!"
 * ''"Try the 1,000-Fold Arms!"
 * ''"Now's your chance!"
 * ''"Spin it back! Make a path!"
 * ''"I already forgot how it looked."