A Plumber's Lament

A Plumber's Lament is the name of a piece of art created by master sculptor Garro of Nimbus Land for the kingdom's usurper queen Valentina during the events of Super Mario RPG: Legend of the Seven Stars. The gold-colored statue is a depiction of a seemingly ordinary, working-class male human plumber. According to Garro, the sculpture's thick mustache covers the "sad, innocent smile of a simple fool," the sideburns serve as a reminder of the plumber's "blue collar roots," and the strong, muscular legs represent the "legs of the masses." While Valentina was initially repulsed by the sculpture, after Garro's analysis of his masterpiece's proletariat symbolism, the queen-to-be lauded A Plumber's Lament, calling it a piece of "gentle beauty" and "raw power." Valentina quickly had the statue put on display by her servant Dodo next to gold sculptures made in Valentina's likeness, which were also created by Garro.

Unbeknownst to Valentina, A Plumber's Lament was actually Super Mario in disguise as part of a plan to infiltrate Nimbus Castle in order to restore King and Queen Nimbus to the throne and topple the regime of the false queen Valentina (who had manipulated the Nimbus population through various political schemes, setting herself up as de facto ruler of Nimbus Land). In order to expose Valentina's ruse to the greater population, King and Queen Nimbus needed to be extradited from the confines of the castle. However, only those with official business with Valentina were allowed entrance to the castle by her guards, the Birdies. Therefore Garro, Valentina's private sculptor but secretly an ally of Mario and the King and Queen's son (and true heir to the throne) Prince Mallow, devised a plan to get Mario past the guards undetected by turning him into his "latest masterpiece" A Plumber's Lament. To do so, Garro actually applied a coat of gold dust all over Mario's face and clothes in order to make him appear like a gold sculpture. Mario, standing perfectly still in order to mimic a statue, was then delivered to Valentina along with several gold sculptures made in the image of the usurper queen, thus allowing Mario to safely and covertly infiltrate the castle.