The 'Shroom:Issue 168/'Shroomfest

'Shroomfest Written by:, , and Art by:

THE 'SHROOM: BRIBES FOR A VENDING MACHINE

'Shroom Research Lab: ''Hello, everyone! Welcome to a new update from your 'Shroom Research Lab. Thank you for joining us today. During our research, we discovered a file concerning a certain feud between the Website Manager, and the Sub-Director of the newspaper regarding the vending machine located in the Break Room. Apparently, it was due to the vending machine, which stopped working and needed to be replaced.''

After the big incident with Ninja Squid and the Shroobs, everything was going peacefully in the 'Shroom's HQ. Everyone was in good mood, and all started the new year with their own project in mind. Superchao had bought a brand new domain located in a tall tree. Apparently, there were some parties going on over there and he gets extra pocket money by stealing stars from some of the players. I guess the Shadow Director's salary isn't paying enough, or perhaps he found a new way to increase his fortune? Well, it's not really any of my business. As for Ninja Squid, he'd been absent from the office more and more often for a while. He explained to me that he is on an odyssey. Not really sure what he meant by that, but all these trips must be getting quite expensive. I hope he didn't get into a spending spree, because his finances will suffer.

Regarding Hooded Pitohui, well, he got into the advertising market. The Strategy Wing Director told me about his intention of winning the award for the Best 'Shroom Team, and his plan is to master the art of "shilling", to make sure everyone understands how great Strategy Wing is. Apparently the costs associated with it are phenomenal, so I think he should avoid overspending. Well, that's just a simple suggestion from the miser that I am. As for Roserade, well, we all know that he is swimming in money, since his Empire earns him a lot, so he didn't really have to worry about taking a few losses... for now.

I am talking a lot about money, aren't I? Well, there is actually a good reason for that. At the 'Shroom's HQ, it was the presentation day of the annual budget. Ninja Squid, the Statistics Manager, was in charge of presenting the budget to the 'Shroom Congress, and everyone was looking forward to the unveiling of the funding that would be given to each team for the duration of the fiscal year. Some complained about the lack of resources available to them in the past few months, and others found that managers too often waste money on extravagances. The break room was in terrible shape and some rooms needed renovations, so it was about time to get the finances in good shape.



After several meetings and discussions with the employees, Hooded Pitohui and Roserade had managed to find new sponsors for the newspaper, allowing The 'Shroom to win a nice jackpot which made it possible to increase the funding. They thought they could satisfy everyone, but it was too good to be true.

During the budget's presentation, it was mentioned that the new break room would incorporate an all-new vending machine, thanks to one of the new sponsors, and that it would offer some delicious cold beverages. A plan for healthier foods would also come into effect in the coming months. After noticing an increase in coffee consumption from the staff, it was decided that the coffee and tea machines would be removed from the office. This was done in order to push for a healthier diet and to force the employees to use the new vending machine.

Of course, this decision was not going to be unanimous. Once he was aware of the decision, Lakituthequick, the Website Manager, burst into Ninja Squid's office asking for an explanation for this ridiculous decision of banning those warm beverages. Roserade, who was also in the Statistics Manager's office, told him to quit complaining and that it was too late to reverse the decision. Roserade wanted cold beverages to be offered in the office for quite some time now, so he categorically refused to let it go.

Ninja Squid told them that it was not exactly too late. The congress still had a deadline of one month to submit the approval papers for the cold drink vending machines, so they still had time to bribe the congress to move forward with the cold beverages and healthy plan, or otherwise object to it.

Upon learning the information from Ninja Squid, Lakituthequick and Roserade quickly started to gather the highest number of individuals that could support their plan to convince the 'Shroom Congress to vote in their favor. It was not going to be an easy fight, but it was all for the greater good I guess. I wonder how much money they will be spending on their respective campaign? I hope they won't go overboard!

Ninja Squid smirked, pleased by the outcome. The resident ninja of the newspaper hadn't told them, but it was he himself who was going to preside over the congress, and he was not going to make their life easy...



'Shroom Research Lab: ''The 'Shroom Research Lab will be looking for documents regarding the outcome of this fierce battle. In the meantime, we will be modifying our servers, because we learned that Windows 98 was now outdated. After all, we can't be using such software anymore, right?''

Staff Notes
Hello there, 'Shroom readers. It is time for another 'Shroomfest!

This time around, your evil Emperor is currently having a fierce fight with your virtuous Website Manager  over... a vending machine. As hilarious as it might sounds, it is a very serious matter for us in the newspaper's office. As for our delightful and loyal Director, he doesn't have any stake in this. Since your Sub-Director can't preside over the congress due to him campaigning for the cold drink vending machine, I have been appointed to preside over the 'Shroom Congress in his place, so I have to ensure that I am on my prime as the legitimate, unbiased judge of The 'Shroom, despite what some would dare to say.

Anyway, the only thing you need to understand here is that Lakituthequick and Roserade will try to persuade you to join their side. If you want to secure the right for coffee, tea or some delicious hot cocoa, you will have to join with our very own master of coding, and if you prefer them to be abolished in favor of some delicious iced tea, sparkling water or tasty lemonade, you might have to fight FOR THE EMPIRE! Oh, and please take note that I will grant contempt of court to any of those who dare to make a mockery of my turf by accepting some of those backdoor bribes. I won't let corruption make its way into my court.

Oh, and a little warning that you won't easily gain favors from me this time (especially if you supported that filthy Super Arrow in his unworthy victory), so you will have to prove yourself up to the job to earn my bonus points, but I am pretty sure it shouldn't be that much of a problem, right? Right.

In any case, you can find your team leaders just below trying to convince you to join their rank, so make sure to pick a side, and in the meantime, I will be waiting you in the court room. See ya!

&mdash;Ninja Squid, Judge

What type of beverage do you prefer: Warm Beverages or Cold Beverages? Choose your side and cast a vote!

Join Team Warm Beverages
Why hello! What? You expected someone else here? You must be mistaken. Whatever the case, we cannot let it happen that our coffee machine gets replaced with some cold box of sparkle water as Rose seems to envision. No sir! Now, everyone who knows me knows I am a huge fan of coffee, however this month I'll be advocating all other warm beverages too! There's a lot, tea, hot chocolate, glühwein, apple cider, warm milk, you name it. Enough reason to remain cosy and warm! You'll see that there is a lot of variety in warm beverages, popularity thereof and interesting tales and stories over the centuries that make them all the better.

See for yourself, and show Rose that cold beverages are just… cold.

&mdash;Lakituthequick, Leader of Team Warm Beverages

Join Team Cold Beverages
Greetings, beautiful 'Shroom readers. I must admit, I'm thankful that the situation surrounding this 'Shroomfest is a little less stressful. My doctor told me that another alien brainwashing could be bad for my health! But you know what wouldn't be bad for my health? The luxuries of cold beverages, which is why I am before you all today. Ranging from cold juices to lemonades, ICEEs to smoothies, milkshakes to even crisp, cold tap water, it is essential that we install this new vending machine to let cold beverages reign supreme! Come now, dear reader, will you trail from the true path, or follow behind my empire once more?

In these next few weeks, I'll be demonstrating just how amazing these drinks are, all of the different kinds of cold beverages, and even their cultural significance! I may be a Grass type, but perhaps for this month, we can indulge in some Ice.

Don't be too hot-headed, and follow cold beverages to victory!

&mdash;Roserade, Leader of Team Cold Beverages

Rules
In order for you to earn points for each teams, we have opted to divide things into three categories.

The result will depends on the number of categories a team will win. For example: If Team Alpha receives 12 endorsements, while Team Bravo receives 8 endorsements, that means that Alpha wins on the endorsements category. The team who wins the most categories will be declared the winner of the 'Shroomfest. In addition, the winner is officially and objectively the best according the The 'Shroom's law. Therefore, taking the win is very important!

Debate Guidelines
The debate’s thread will be opened by the designated judge who will make a brief introduction to the debate’s subject, along with the motivations of each team's leader.

Afterwards, for a period of three weeks, the team leaders and their supporters will try to convince you that their team is truly the best. They'll do this with arguments, arts, photos, and stories that will demonstrate the reasons why their choices is truly the better. After one week of debating, the judge will then write a brief note, highlighting the best cases from both team, and even question the various subjects raised by the team leaders and supporters. Afterwards, they will have to argue against the questions or subjects brought up by the judge, which will lead to further debating. This cycle will occur every week in order to keep the debate as fresh, and up to date as possible. Once the three-week period has passed, the judge will conclude the debate with a short message and invite the participants to come back for the results that will come out at the release of the 'Shroom's next issue. Any message or argument posted after this message won't be taken into account during the compilation of the results.

How to endorse a team: On the debate thread, you just have to post a simple word of encouragement for the team you choose to support. It is entirely possible to change teams at any time, by writing another word of encouragement to the other team to change side. Take note that only the last team you endorse before the debate ends will be the one that will be taken into account for the results. So be sure that the team you choose to support is the one you want. How to give points to the Efforts category: To allow your team to score point into the "Efforts" category, you must add valuable posts to the debate. Lay out your own opinion/arguments, create art or photos of your favorite beverages (caption are allowed), write entertaining stories, or even make a meme or two. Making the most convincing and entertaining case is an important part of the debate. If you are unsure if something is worthy of the "Efforts" category, just ask the judge about it on Discord, or with a PM. Our main goal is to make the debate as accessible as possible.

'''Please note that in an effort to keep the debate civil, fun, and lighthearted, please, we request that you respect all the instructions. Any inappropriate behaviors (spam, flaming, personal attacks, etc…), and discussions regarding politics, social issues, or any controversial topics that veer away from the light-hearted nature of this debate will not be tolerated. '''

The debate will take place from March 20th to April 10th. To join the debate, click here.

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