The 'Shroom:Issue IX/Fake News

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We apologize but the Fake News will come out Wednesday, November 8, 2015

How the heck are you seeing this? :|

Super Mario Chef Challenge
Premiering tonight (Friday the second of November) at 5:00 PM is a new, Mario themed cooking/comedy show that focuses mainly on wacky food related antics instead of actual cooking in an attempt to draw younger viewers to the Food Network's programming. It is hosted by Mario & Luigi as they travel the world to find the greatest food, and have quite a few laughs along the way... Or just stay at home and throw silverware around. So far, four episodes and a double length, two part special have been announced;

"Episode 1A: Taco Factory"
Airtime: November 2nd, 5:00 PM

Description: Mario and Luigi go to Fort Worth, Texas to visit the headqaurters/packing facility/flagship restauraunt of the Mexican restauraunt chain Blue Taco, were they stuff their faces with free Tacos, learn how Blue Taco's signature blue salsa is made, and much more! Also, viewers will get to see Mario trick Luigi into eating the world's spicest pepper, the Naga Jolokia.

"Episode 1B: Vermont"
Airtime: November 2nd, 5:30 PM

Description: Mario, on the run from Luigi after the pepper incident, visits Vermont, and is tricked by Bowser into churning butter. Mario then uses the butter to make all Bowser's troops fat, foiling Bowser's plans. Then, he visits a dairy farm and learns how cheese is made, and meets up with Luigi (who forgives him) and they pay a visit to Ben and Jerry of the famous ice cream company.

"Episode 2: Japan"
Airtime: November 9th, 5:30 PM

Description: Mario and Luigi go to Japan, were they work in a ramen shop on a busy night but get fired due to their incompetance and lack of knowledge of japanese, eat at a restauraunt were you catch your own fish out of a tank before you eat it, eat Squid on a stick, and attempt to eat hot instant curry on a high-speed train (Which, needless to say, doesn't work out so well).

"Episode 3: Food of the Future"
Airtime: November 16th, 5:30 PM

Description: Mario eats too much leftover turkey for lunch, and falls asleep. In his dream, he imagines a far future world were turkeys ruled over human slaves and all meals were made of flavored, microwavable bread. Meanwhile, Luigi tries to create the next food sensation by creating a waffle sandwhich.

"Episode 4: Pizza and BBQ"
Airtime: November 23rd, 5:30 PM

Description: Mario and Luigi find out that all of the pizza deliverymen that work for their pizzeria in Brooklyn are sick, and Luigi decides to take on the job over. Along the way, he goes to a BBQ, fights thieves at a supermarket, and finds a diamond in a trash can. Meanwhile, Mario tries new pizza topping combinations.

"Episode 5: Boxcar Blues"
Airtime: November 30th, 5:30 PM

Description: When a careless man operating a switch on a railroad sends a train full of high explosives heading straight into a major city in the place of a train full of canned pineapples, Luigi saves the day, but accidentaly blows up a meat packing plant, and is forced to clean up the mess. Meanwhile, Mario prepares a romantic meal for Princess Peach.

Is there any more?
5 more episodes plus a exciting two part season finale are also planned for the first season, but details have not been announced. Make sure not to miss Super Mario Chef Challenge when it premiers tonight, or you will be missing out on a wonderfull world of fun and... food.

=== Mario & Sonic: Nitro GP ===

http://editthis.info/images/unijuwiki/a/a9/MnSNGP.PNG

Mario & Sonic: Nitro GP is an upcoming Video Game in the Mario & Sonic Series, for the Wii.

Gameplay
Its basically, just another Mario Kart game, but with several different types of vechiles, and the ability to do Tricks(Like in Sonic Riders, and Mario Kart Wii). The Player can choose to race in a Kart(Mario Kart), An Airboard(Sonic Riders), a Motorcycle(Mario kart), or Air skates(Sonic Riders). Each have their own upsides, and downsides. Tricks are performed by shaking and moving the Nunchuck attachment, when your about to fly off a ramp, or right after flying off a ramp as part of a series of tricks, started right before flying off the ramp. Doing a trick gets you -100 - +1000 points, getting points effects %50 of your score in the end of a match. So, even if you got a bad place, you can make up for it by doing tricks.
 * Kart
 * Slower then others, but with good traction and control.
 * Airboard
 * The fastest, but with bad control, and since its not even touching the ground, awful traction.
 * Motorcycle
 * Fast, and with good control, however bad stearing, and rather clunky control.
 * Air skates
 * Very good control, and stearing, but not all that fast, and its worse at tricks then the others.

Controls

 * Kart
 * Tilt Wii-Remote(Hold sideways) - Stear
 * 1 - Accelerate
 * 2 - Break
 * A - Item
 * Airboard
 * Tilt Wii-Remote(Hold up) - Stear
 * A - Accelerate
 * B - Item
 * D-pad(Down) - Break
 * Wii Balance-board control
 * Tilt - Stear
 * A - Accelerate
 * B - Item
 * D-pad(Down) - Break
 * Motorcycle
 * Wii-Remote Side to Side(Hold Sideways) - Stear
 * Wii-Remote Forwards - Accelerate
 * Wii-Remote Backwards - Break
 * A/B - Item
 * Air skates
 * Wii-Remote (As a Pointer) - Stear
 * B - Item
 * A - Accelerate
 * D-pad(Down) - Break

Mushroom Cup
The Mushroom Cup's Raceways are all rather simple. Sometimes full of traps, but usually very straight forward. They also tend to have more Items then the Emerald Cup ones.


 * Mario's Raceway
 * A large generic Raceway, themed to Mario, and the Mushroom Kingdom.
 * Kamek's Cavern
 * An underground cave Raceway, filled with Boos, and Dry Bones.
 * Paper Raceway
 * A Paper Mario-like raceway, going trough a town resembling Toad Town from the first Paper Mario game.
 * WarioWare Inc.
 * A course going right through the WarioWare HQ building. And, in the process going through several Micro Games.
 * Rainbow Road
 * The same old Rainbow Road style stage from all the other Mario racing games. However, here it has a lot more traps(Such as pieces of track that fall out, or move). Also, theres now several trick jumps, ramps that are there to trick you into jumping, then falling to your doom. Also, for the first time since Super Mario Kart, Thwomps inhabit this stage.

Emerald Cup
The Emerald Cup's stages are all full of twists, loops, and corkscrews. If your not going fast enough, you'll simply fall out of the crazy track!


 * Metal Harbour
 * Similar to the Sonic Adventure 2 stage, of the same name. A military Harbour raceway, filled with all kinds of traps.
 * Green Hill Zone
 * A familiar place for Sonic Fans. The first stage in Sonic the Hedgehog(1991), and also an area that started a long series of similar levels in the Sonic Series.
 * Sky Deck
 * A huge Raceway that takes place on top of Dr. Eggman's flying battleship, the Egg Carrier.
 * Casinopolis
 * A huge Pinball stage(Similar to Waluigi's Pinball, but more... Pinball-like).
 * Emerald Stage
 * A race track based on the special stages of Sonic the Hedgehog 2, and Sonic Heroes. A large half pipe like stage, filled with spiked balls, and bombs. The Player can do tricks if they run up on the Half Pipe, however, they can fall off the stage if their not careful. Also, like in Sonic Heroes, sometimes a Balloon will come, and drop both Traps, and items, so be careful.

Star Cup(Retro Cup)

 * Mario Circuit 1 (SMK)
 * Toad's Turnpike (MK64)
 * Sky Garden (MKSS)
 * Waluigi Stadium (MKDD)
 * Airship Fortress (MKDS)

Ring Cup(Retro Cup)

 * Radical City (SR)
 * Reactive Factory(SR)
 * White Cave (SRiders)
 * Dark Desert (SRiders)
 * Digital Dimension (SRiders)

Fake News Interview: Geno
3D: Hidey-o, readers-o and welcome to yet another piece of trash slapped together to make you laugh until your eyes fall out! Today's hapless victim is Geno! Geno: Hello, carbon-based fleshy earth creatures. 3D: Geno, can you tell us a bit about your adventures with Mario in Super Mario RPG? Geno: It was boring. 3D: Anything else? Geno: It was boring. 3D: I see. Geno: If SquareSoft hadn't offered me 5,000,000 gold coins for the contract, I would have quit in no time flat. 3D: What would they have done then? Geno: They had an, er, replacement ready...

* Somewhere Somewhere Else...*

E.T.: I STILL SAY I SHOULD'VE GOTTEN THAT CONTRACT! E.T.'s Dad: Shut up. You already ruined one viedo game company.

* Back to the Auditorium*

3D: Do you regret the fact that Nintendo decided to remove you from the franchise? Geno: Nope. 3D: Why's that? Geno: If I had stayed, I'd have had to star alongside Bowser Jr. 3D: Good point. Geno: Also, a wooden doll makes a lousy body. 3D: How so? Geno: Lighting campfires is a hard task when you're made of wood. Also, a wooden body makes you practisally invincible. 3D: Why is that bad?

* FLASHBACK*

Smithy: AH HA HA HA HA! I SHALL ANNHIALATE YOU!

* SMITHY USED ENERGY BLAST!*

* THE ATTACK BOUNCED OFF GENO!*

Smithy: AH HA HA HA HA! I SHALL ANNHIALATE YOU!

* SMITHY USED ENERGY BLAST!*

* THE ATTACK BOUNCED OFF GENO!*

Smithy: AH HA HA HA HA! I SHALL ANNHIALATE YOU!

* SMITHY USED ENERGY BLAST!*

* THE ATTACK BOUNCED OFF GENO!*

Smithy: AH HA HA HA HA! I SHALL ANNHIALATE YOU!

* END FLASHBACK*

3D: I see. Again. Now, let's ask some questions about your life now. Where do you live? Geno: In a galaxy far, far away. 3D: Anything you can tell me? Geno: That dude that's trying to take over it likes black, wears a dorky mask and has some serious asthama. 3D: That sounds familiar... What does your name sound like pronounced in the English language? Geno: Eeek-anglo, fabarh tanh, far-crak-wah-glowlo, teddarforcnahvealk. 3D: Wow. Geno: But my close friends call me Ed. 3D: 'K. My last question: what does your true form look like? Geno: I really don't think.. 3D: C'mon! Geno: OK...

* FWASHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM*

* ALL AUDIENCE MEMBERS LOST 500 HP!*

* ALL AUDIENCE MEMBERS WERE KNOCKED OUT!* *

Geno: Well, that's just ducky.

* END TRANSMISSION*