The 'Shroom:Issue XIX/Character Comparison

Character Comparison by



=Characters: Pauline vs. Rosalina= Yes, yes, here I am. Doesn't this comparison seem so unfair? Rosalina is like, the newest Mario girl out there, and… Pauline is the oldest one out there! And that would be exactly why I'm comparing them. They've both only been in two games, so heck, it might not be as unfair as you might think. Oh, and BTW, feel free to come to my talk page to give me ideas for comparison subjects. I will read each and every one if you do. Rest assure. But I won't give any guarantees as to whether I will use it or not, and you may not get a reply from me in either case. But if your idea is used, I will credit you for your comparison ideas. Enough with that, let's get on with the comparison.

Pauline
Okay, there isn't much to say, I guess. Well, then again, last month's Comparison just had too many physical characteristics. Anyway, yeah, red one-piece, brunette hair, typical lady that you might see any day. High heels, all that stuff. The artwork I put up there is from the original Donkey Kong, just because there is no artwork for March of the Minis. Like, what happened? Anyway, below is a screenshot of Pauline, in-game. What the heck? She looks nothing like herself in the artwork!! Is that brunette, or is that blonde? And, either way, her dress is definitely not red! It also looks like she's wearing blue stockings, too! It's like she decided to go and jack Princess Peach's clothes, even though she didn't exist yet! They screwed up with either not making her look right in-game, or they messed up on the artwork. OR, Nintendo all believed us to be color-blind.

Rosalina
Did you notice that rod thing in Rosalina's hand? It was only in SMG, I guess she realized she wouldn't be needing to collect STAR BITS in a KART RACE… despite there are star bits on Rainbow Road. The tip of the rod has a yellow star on it. The beta version of SMG was seen with a yellow pointer star, rather than a blue one. I guess it was saying that “Your Wiimote is like that rod thingy Rosalina has!” Because it collects bits, right? Well, they changed it later to blue, but the co-op star pointer became yellow, so it was still there. Anyway, let's get on with appearance. First of all, you know this is no normal lady, because she is wearing a crown. It must mean she is some sort of figure of authority. Also, I've always been wondering; does Rosalina have a right eye? I mean, seriously! YOU CAN NEVER SEE IT!! It’s like a pirate's eye-patch or something. Maybe there's no eyeball, and maybe it's just a socket (ew, gross). Her clothes have less skin exposure compared to Pauline, and she seems more shy. Her voice is also strangely low.

Pauline
You can tell she is the active kind, and loves attention, I guess. Remember in Donkey Kong, when you're playing as Mario, dodging barrels, climbing ladders, getting the crap beaten out of an ape? Guess what Pauline was doing the entire time. She was up on the upper most platform, crying “Help!” Now look again at the image of the game screenshot. What is right behind Pauline's back? THAT RIGHT, IT'S A LADDER. Like, just climb the stupid thing while the ape's occupied with rolling barrels! Nope, she wants to be saved by the hero. If a bushy-moustached carpenter can really be considered a hero, that is…

Rosalina
She practically has the opposite character as Pauline. As mentioned before, she is shy. She is also caring, and a mother-like existence for Lumas. She even dragged one into Mario Kart, too. Besides, she was never the damsel in distress. She also cooperated with Mario, a complete stranger, to help save Peach, another complete stranger. It takes a lot of generosity to do that. It would be like “What if it's blizzarding outside, and a stranger comes to your door, and asks if he can stay at your house for a few hours?” Would you let him in? “What if it was Michael Jackson?” No. So, I guess it takes courage to control the stars as well.

Pauline
Pauline. She, was… kidnapped by an ape with a tie on. Actually, he didn't have a tie back then. But the story… it's so unoriginal! My brother got kidnapped by an ape once! I've been kidnapped! Everybody's been kidnapped by apes everywhere! Right? It happens all the time. Like, what were they thinking? Couldn't they have thought of something never thought of before? Nintendo got smart, and later changed it to a turtle; now that's some creativity to be credited right there.

Rosalina
I was being stupid and/or random in the Pauline section for history, my apologies :P. Anyway, Rosalina has a deep history. Super Mario Galaxy actually had a completely pointless story section! Well, I mean, it wasn't necessary to beat the game or anything, though. So she cared for all these Lumas, yadda yadda yadda. The point is, Mario platformers shouldn't have storylines. Wait, that's not the point. I'm doing a comparison here, not a review. So, for a Mario character, and a platformer, that is, she has a pretty concise history. Interesting.

Wrapup
So there you have it. The classic, but yet active, Pauline, vs. the modern but yet shy Rosalina. I will ask you not to sue me for results, though. Get a lawyer, dude. Now click "Show" for your awaiting surprise...(or is it...? dun-dun-dhuuuun)

WINNER __HIDER__ ROSALINA – I'm sure the results were practically expected :P. Anyway, forget history, but I think Rosalina's character itself is better than Pauline's. Also, Pauline has way too much lipstick... And, Rosalina will likely appear in games yet to come. Pauline's pretty much stuck in the warp pipe.